My husband wakes me up!

Published

Ok so I have been married a little over a year now and I work nights 7 p-7am. My husband is absolutely awesome with helping with the house, my kids, and well EVERYTHING. My friends are envious the man is amazing I'm lucky no doubt. There's one major issue that keeps causing fights between us though. I work nights and my husband is self employed so he's home most of the time. While this is a benefit to us in many areas it is killing my sleep. He wakes me up all the time. I can't get him to understand even if it was just for a minute or five that it's a big deal. Today he woke me up to help him find something. He had no where to go. There was no urgent need. He just wanted my help. I was really ugly to him to the point I left for work not speaking to him. Has anyone else had this issue? Any advice?

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Talk to him.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Medsurg/ICU, Mental Health, Home Health.

Wake him up in the middle of the night a few times.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).

Welcome to AN.com, BabyRN_nights!

This is a conundrum! On one hand, you've got a devoted helpmate, and on the other hand you've got a needy dude to have to deal with. Hmmm!

I'm at a loss... as humorous as Penolope_Pitstop's advice is, I think I have to go with hherrn's. Playing "See How You Like It" could just cause more problems

Good luck to you, BabyRN_nights, and if you find a magic solution, please let us know and then bottle and patent it!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I have no magical solution for keeping your husband in line.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Critical Care.

Each time he wakes you up during the day, wake him up at the corresponding time during the night.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia.

You can also make those preemptive strikes by phone while you are working.

Let's just say that I have personal experience with their effectiveness..

Up Vote Up Vote ×

How does he feel about what he is doing (assuming there has been some kind of discussion in the past): Does he truly not understand how disruptive this is or does he not CARE?

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Someone I know made liberal use of hotel rooms because of the distance to her job. Start going to a hotel for rest and I'll bet he gets the message.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Sleep is precious for night shift workers. Unfortunate that he doesn't comprehend your need for sleep. If he is that outstanding of a husband in general.. get on day shift.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in CMSRN.

I would wake him up while he is sleeping. Sounds bad but if talking to him does not cut it, than action would be the next step. Some just do not understand that sleeping during the day is equivalent to night time sleeping. And is necessary for your health. Keep us posted on what worked out.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Case manager, float pool, and more.

Talk to him first and if there is no resolution you may want to consider switching shifts. Especially since he sounds supportive in every other way. You may miss the night shift differential in pay but sanity and sleep may be more valuable. You could also employee a "do not disturb" type sign on the bedroom door whilst sleeping as a visual reminder for him.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion