What do you say when a friend and classmate asks to see your answers or papers?
My mom called me a pushover and maybe. One girl, also my friend as in hanging out outside of classes, asked to see my 5 page study guide for a final in our class we had to write. I waited until she told me she did her own, then she asked again to see mine in case she left anything out so I emailed it to her the night before. The next day in final we took out our guides and the teacher checked them all over, and I found out that she had copied mine exactly. She told the teacher we worked on it together before I could open my mouth, and the teacher said "that was smart" and was fine so I just didn't say anything when maybe I should have I don't know. The teacher had already seen mine first. This friend is a good friend.
And other examples were just other friends asking for my homework or lab answers and reports. I mean it seems wrong to say no to a friend but???? I tried to help explain the answer to them instead but I didn't always have time (or even know how to sometimes). I gave answers in the beginning but then I felt used by the end of the semester, by my own fault. Maybe this is just what you do though.. share answers? I wasn't a good student in high school so never had this problem before of people wanting my work!
Just wondering how you guys respond to friends who ask for your work. Thank you.
First and foremost, change your picture. You want to remain anonymous on this website, especially with posting what you just did. Secondly, I did have an incident similar to this one, and I just said no. What's the worst that can happen? They tell you they don't want to be friends with you anymore, fine by me! Don't let people cheat, and that's exactly what it is.
I have said no numerous times to people who have asked to see my work or study my personal test reviews. However, I have offered to help others out to do their own work, if time permitted and they just needed some guidance.
You really aren't helping if they get to copy your stuff. I know I don't want a nurse who didn't do their own work and didn't work hard in nursing school and earn their own grades.
Honestly, a friend wouldn't do something like that without your permission and even then I doubt a friend would do that.
Depends, if they are classmates I'll tell them to bug off. If they are a friend I'll tell them that I ain't gonna let them down like that. They need to know their own **** in prep for NCLEX.
Well, I am OLD school. I learned shorthand in HS and still remembered a good chunk years later when I went back to NS. I used it a LOT. My notes would have been USELESS to anyone but me =)
In bio class several years ago, I gave my lab assignment to one of my lab partners to copy OUR lab results from. He was was suppose to answer questions, etc use those values. He ended up copying my whole paper and turned it in. We both got an email about dishonesty, etc. Yes, I could have gotten kicked out, etc. But the professor just gave us a warning. Next week the guy needed the info and I just flat told him no. He PROMISED and I still said nope. Bridge burned, I can not trust him again.
She is your friend. You can forgive the ONE TIME. But when she asks again, just tell her nicely that you feel uncomfortable doing that, considering what happened before. You didn't like being in that postion and the best way to prevent it, is not to share homework. Notes, ect.. yes. But not actual homework. If she stressed you over it, just tell he that you thought as your friend, she would UNDERSTAND.
Another way is, talk about such situations in a group. (other class mates, in the hall, etc) and mentioned what ws done to you, and how it made you feel, and how you learned your lesson and wouldn't share again. Made it seem your giving THEM the heads up. Let your friend nod her head sagely, but hope she gets the message to not even try.
A similar situation happened to me last semester. We had to make a powerpoint for a class. A classmate didn't do well on hers so she asked me to email her mine so she can see what she did wrong. I obliged (even though I thought it was a strange request) since they were already graded. I found out after the fact that she was allowed to make corrections on her assignment and likely used mine to copy from. I confronted her. It didn't go over too well. Of course she denied it, and I would have no proof whether she copied it or not, so I just let it go and vowed to never send her any of my assignments again.
The same girl asked me to email her a paper that I did 3 years ago for a class that she was in at the time (this was the semester before the incident I described above). I told her I didn't know if I still had it since I got a new computer since then (which was a lie). I told her I'd look for it but I never mentioned it to her again.
I'm betting that if this student was ever confronted by a teacher about plagiarizing or cheating off you, she would throw you under the bus to save herself. Even if by chance she didn't blow you in to save herself, you would be just as guilty as her if this was ever discovered.
Just tell her that you won't participate in cheating. You can also mention to her that if she doesn't bother to learn the material and relies on cheating off others, she's only hurting herself when it comes time for the NCLEX. Good luck!
I personally never really cared when people needed my answers or needed to copy, especially friends. Sometimes we just get lazy or things come up and its nice to have someone to rely on every once in a while when something like that comes up.
I took solace in the fact that when its go time for an exam or a practical, if they truly didnt know rhe material instead of just beinf lazy theyre going to fail. Horribly and miserably. And at that point theres nothing you can do for them.
But if youre unlike me, and more of the academic scholar then the academic integrity is probably whats getting at you. So if it makes you so uncomfortable youll have to suck it up and say she cant use you that way anymore. I personally wouldve been annoyed at her lying to me about having a guide and using mine, and then lying again. If anything I would use that as the basis tof my argument why Im no longer letting her "use" my notes etc.
But I can say with a high degree of confidence, if she needs to copy so desperately in just the prerequisite classes, I dont have much faith in her being accepted ininto nursing school, and even less faith shell complete NS.
Be prepared for her to pitch a fit, imply that if she does poorly it will be your fault, and say that she never liked you anyway and especially now that you have shown your true colors.
Obviously, if she does poorly it will be her own damn fault. If she needs help studying she can go to the college learning center. If she never liked you anyway, that says a good deal more about her true colors, doesn't it?
I wouldn't help her cheat any more, and neither would I lie about why (e.g., "I got a new computer and don't have it anymore"). Confronting her c truth is the only way to sleep well at night, and maybe in ten years she'll thank you for a light-dawning moment that set her on a better path. If so, nice, but her welfare is not your responsibility.
If your grades are really good and people know that because you tell them, stop. When they ask how you did on that test, you can say, ruefully, "Well, I could have done better. How about we go get coffee?" Your goal is to maintain some personal boundaries here. They'll stop asking sooner or later.
By allowing her to cheat off of your work you are helping to create a potentially BAD nurse. The ones who will be at greatest risk will be her future patients. View 'saying no' as a prime opportunity to start practicing your patient advocate skills.
I wouldn't help her cheat any more, and neither would I lie about why (e.g., "I got a new computer and don't gave it anymore"). Confronting her c truth is the only way to sleep well at night, and maybe in ten years she'll thank you for a light-dawning moment that set her on a better path. If so, nice, but her welfare is not your responsibility.
I agree lying like that didn't really prevent the girl in my case to stop asking for my assignments. She only stopped when I confronted her. The lying thing was a short term fix.
missmollie, ADN, BSN, RN
869 Posts
First and foremost, change your picture. You want to remain anonymous on this website, especially with posting what you just did. Secondly, I did have an incident similar to this one, and I just said no. What's the worst that can happen? They tell you they don't want to be friends with you anymore, fine by me! Don't let people cheat, and that's exactly what it is.