Would you be insulted?

Nurses General Nursing

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Would you be insulted if you were never asked to precept and people with less experience than you were being asked to precept left and right?

I have been at my job for three years. The clinical nurse educator used to work on the floor and she precepted me and basically told me I was too stupid to work in the specialty. I ended up having to ask for a different preceptor and the two new ones I got disagreed and here we are three years later. She was promoted as clinical nurse educator and I can tell she hates me or at the very least thinks lowly of me.

I asked a fellow coworker (one I trust) if I should be worried, if it means that I am too stupid or terrible. She says I should consider myself lucky. Also, if I was so terrible, I would have been fired ages ago.

I would have thought with the extremely high turnover and the fact that I am quickly becoming more experienced that I would have been asked but then I remembered my history with the nurse educator.

How should I approach this, if at all? It isn't that I necessarily want to precept, but it bothers me that there may be a reason I haven't been asked.

Or should I thank my lucky stars?

Why don’t you just ask her? Be direct. I was. I had a similar situation, not exactly like yours but had a similar situation. I simply asked why. Was told that other people had asked to precept and I hadn’t.

So guess what? Now I precept.

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Specializes in CMSRN, hospice.

If you would actually like to precept, maybe just tell her so? "I am feeling more confident and experienced, and am interested in becoming a preceptor. Would that be a possibility? How would you recommend I prepare for that role?" Go into the conversation with an open mind; it could (and hopefully will) be a reason other than her personal feelings toward you.

If you genuinely don't care about precepting and are only concerned with this person's opinion of you, don't say anything. We all work with people who don't care for us; life goes on. If she isn't preventing you from advancement that you desire and feel you have earned, don't worry yourself with it.

Congrats on working toward your MSN! That's exciting and I hope it will lead to some great opportunities for you in the future. ?

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Yea i'd be upset about that, I'd hate to think someone thinks poorly of me, given it's unjustified I'd say it's just her being petty and silly. I'm just currently being a preceptor to a nursing student for the first time, one year after starting work, and I love it! I can't believe how much knowledge I have gained, gee I remember being a student two years ago and wishing I knew as much as my preceptor knew then, and I am so proud of myself that I now know it and can teach it!

I am from a unit with very little turnover, however recently a lot of nurses are retiring, and so there are a few of us young ones coming through, and it's really nice to be accepted into a unit that is so close knit. If your unit is just being petty and toxic, hopefully you can find somewhere else to go that appreciates you more. Also, good luck with grad school! You never know, sometimes you have to take a step away from the floor to be appreciated.. maybe she'll notice how good you are when you're gone!

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Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
19 hours ago, ThePrincessBride said:

Would you be insulted if you were never asked to precept and people with less experience than you were being asked to precept left and right?

Or should I thank my lucky stars?

I thank my lucky stars administration at Wrongway Regional Medical Center knows that I believe any job worth doing is worth doing quarter-heartedly, because doing a job half-heartedly is a quarter heart too much for me.

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15 hours ago, ThePrincessBride said:

I know what you mean. It just bothers me to know a colleague thinks so poorly of me and harbors bad feelings toward me even years after the fact, you know?

THAT is the colleague's problem, don't make it yours. If she wants to remain petty and vindictive , your best bet is to ignore it.

By the way, precepting is not a badge of honor, it is mainly a pain in the tookas.

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Might I just say, I’m sure that it feels awful to some degree. Who wouldn’t feel slightly uncomfortable in your exact situation knowing the history you two have. Then again, I’m sure many have felt slighted in some manner. Justly or not. If I were you I’d leave it alone. As you’ve mentioned you’ll be changing your work load there and likely moving on to another unit/facility during/after grad school. What I’d suggest is JUST before you actually leave (if you do) that place is ask this person for their feedback on where they saw me then and now. IF you even care to by then. IF you even have any respect for their opinion. In the end what they think doesn’t change how you practice, if it’s going to be non constructive feedback.

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Specializes in EMS, ED, Trauma, CEN, CPEN, TCRN.
15 hours ago, ThePrincessBride said:

I know what you mean. It just bothers me to know a colleague thinks so poorly of me and harbors bad feelings toward me even years after the fact, you know?

Yeah, I totally understand. But it seems more like her problem than yours — clearly you are not stupid or incompetent or whatever she said. That would offend me far more than not being asked to precept.

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Specializes in Dialysis.

Look at it as a blessing. If someone performs poorly, can’t be blamed on you or the educators perceived incompetency of you. Move on, too many other things that really matter out there

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***! I'd be celebrating. I do not like to talk when I'm working, I don't like to talk period. Having to teach someone while trying to work would be the worst torture imaginable. I had a student last Thursday, she was the sweetest thing, a big help too! And I did make it through... and I think she may have learned a few things. But, I hated every second of it.

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Specializes in Community Health, Med/Surg, ICU Stepdown.

To me it sounds like there could be a racial component to this, unfortunately. Maybe I am hypersensitive because I am married to a black person and have done a lot of research on implicit bias but many people (sometimes unknowingly) automatically have a negative perception of black employees and assign good characteristics to white employees. I hope this is not what’s going on and I wouldn’t accuse the educator of it but it doesn’t sound like there is another reason besides her just not liking you as others have agreed you are a competent nurse and you have worked successfully for 3 years. Sounds like a difficult environment to work in.

Congrats on grad school and your next steps! I agree with above posters if you do want to precept schedule a meeting with the educator and let her know you’re interested. Or schedule the meeting to ask for feedback on your work performance. Good luck!

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Specializes in CVICU, MICU, Burn ICU.

What are you going to grad school for? Would precepting be a good activity for you? Is it an MSN in education? Is it administration? If so -- precepting would be good for you. Have a direct conversation with an attitude of expecting her to respond appropriately and encouragingly as the nurse educator.

If precepting is not going to help you prepare for your future, forget about it and let it go. You don't have time or mental energy for it.

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Lol no...take it as a blessing.

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