Stupid hurts.

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OK all y’all, time to lighten it up. Disclaimer: this is kinda an ED thing but all disciplines are more than welcome to join.

Title says it all. I’ll start.

Alcohol + jammed lawnmower = date with orthopedic surgeon. Yeah, stupid hurts.

When you’re drunk AND a nurse, you should probably not attempt to jump over a picket fence resulting in a torn crotch (everything) and multiple wound vacs for months.

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Specializes in Neuro ICU and Med Surg.

If you are riding in your friend's jeep with no doors it is advisable to wear a seatbelt.

Thankfully only a bit of road rash.

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On 4/27/2019 at 3:05 PM, Ruby Vee said:

That's a good one. Or the mother who let her intubated son suck Snapple off a toothette (spongey mouth swab). The new grad who taught her to do that told her it was OK didn't set any limits. At change of shift, while the newbie was giving me report, the mother came out of the room to ask for another bottle of Snapple because 'he drank all the first one'. It was one of those instances where my gut immediately flashed me a warning and I was out of the chair and at the bedside in two seconds at the most. It was already too late. The kid had vomited, then aspirated, desaturated and coded. Very sad outcome.

I tried my best to teach the new grad the error she'd made, but she didn't get it. Didn't think she had done anything wrong. INSISTED she hadn't done anything wrong -- after she told me in great detail how she'd given the mom a handful of toothettes and the Snapple, telling her she'd get him another when she needed it, and instructed her in "wetting his mouth for comfort." I was proud of myself for not screaming at her. She, as much as the mother, caused that kid's demise. She's a CRNA now. The consensus is she still doesn't get it.

Now that’s just plain scary. Oral care doesn’t take a bottle of h20, and sugary Snapple would have rotted out his teeth if he hadn’t aspirated. Yeah, it’s the least severe of the possibilities, but the biggest common sense one for even someone who is not in the medical field. Now she’s advanced her career and is still oblivious. Just another reason to check out our health care providers.

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Do NOT wax your nose hairs. They are there for a reason. Besides, we’re tired of your whining about the abscess in your nose.

Thoroughly check the fish filet you’re about to eat for bones, and take smaller bites so you can feel the missed fish bone BEFORE you swallow it.

Just because your buddy let you shove a Lego into his ear so deeply it had to be removed in our office, doesn’t mean you let him to it to you in return. Yes, we saw two teenage boys within a week for that; they were friends who’d dared each other.

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Specializes in School Nurse, past Med Surge.
On 4/27/2019 at 11:49 PM, TriciaJ said:

Was walking around the house naked, then slipped and fell on it. Duh!

"Million to one shot, Doc!"

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Specializes in School Nurse.

My favorite was a line from the attending on one of these events. I was working in the ER when we had a man presented with a light bulb in his rectum. Now you work long enough in an ER you'll see all sorts of stuff placed up in there. It was late and the attending had gone off to take a nap. I told the intern that glass he'd have to be careful with. So he decides to go wake the attending. I didn't hear the intern's statement to the doctor, but I heard the attending boom back: "Is it still attached to the lamp? It makes a difference."

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Specializes in Geriatrics, Dialysis.
3 hours ago, aprilmoss said:

My favorite was a line from the attending on one of these events. I was working in the ER when we had a man presented with a light bulb in his rectum. Now you work long enough in an ER you'll see all sorts of stuff placed up in there. It was late and the attending had gone off to take a nap. I told the intern that glass he'd have to be careful with. So he decides to go wake the attending. I didn't hear the intern's statement to the doctor, but I heard the attending boom back: "Is it still attached to the lamp? It makes a difference."

That's awesome! There's a doc that's really seen it all. I love these ER stories, people are just so, so stupid sometimes.

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Specializes in Pediatric specialty.

New pulmonary pediatric patient being seen by her doctor. As they were leaving 5 cop cars zoomed into the parking lot along side two undercovers where they arrested her mom who oddly drove a u-haul to their appointment....? Felt so bad for the patient.

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Specializes in CEN.

Don't ever run from the police dog. They are faster than you are

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Specializes in CEN.

If you roll your 4-wheeler over on yourself and spend the night pinned under it in 30 degree weather until your friend comes looking for you, don't finish off the case of beer before coming into the ER. It makes it harder to get you into surgery expediantly

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Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

For ladies only: Please, do NOT use a potato as a pessary for prolapsed uterus. It will grow roots and decide to live there. And getting it out will mess you up, for good, IYKWIM

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Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

also: Please DO remember when you have a tampon in so the GYN does not have to pull out a foul-smelling mess of goo from your hoo-hah a month later and put you on a strong course of antibiotics. The GYN is NOT laughing, nor am I as the nurse, assisting in the extraction.

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