I'm surprised there has been no mention of the Stanford rape trial and sentence on all nurses. I'm opening up the discussion as I feel it pertains to us in many ways. One as people who may have been victims or know others who have been victims of sexual violence and two as nurses that have taken care of others in this situation, whether directly in ER or a patient suffering from PTSD with other health problems as well.
I applaud the survivor's bravery and her impact statement that has gone public. I hope this will comfort other survivors, but even more I hope this will discourage rape in general. Campus rapes are common and rapes at frats are in the news frequently. Once again a college athlete got off with just a slap on the wrist, although I don't think he counted on all the negative publicity this case has garnered.
What disturbs me the most is the letters of the parents to the judge. The father's don't punish him for 20 minutes of action. Then the mother's letter, who by the way is a nurse for gynecological surgeries and in the past as a pediatric nurse, who had not one iota of empathy for the victim. Her letter simply astonished me. I can't believe as a woman, as a nurse, as a mother of a daughter she had no empathy for the victim! This troubles me the most! I imagine in her years as a nurse she must have taken care of a rape victim and her total lack of empathy for the victim disturbs me greatly!
I think it is disgusting that he is going to county jail for 6 months after being convicted of three felonies. I would say I feel for his mother and father for loving their son, but I don't. His family was arrogant and showed no remorse for the victim and tried to make the boy out to be the victim. I don't see any significance in him registering as a sex offender or not being able to go to the olympics...Most people don't get HALF the opprotunities that he gets. I refuse to feel sorry for some rich kid that rape's a girl behind a dumpster especially when truthfully, he had so much going for himself and probably could have hooked up with a girl, with her consent, if he wanted to.
Another thing about this case that pisses me off to no end is the fact that people are convicted of crimes that they did not commit everyday and serve time in prison as criminals. That is wrong and is not fair. It shows that with the right amount of money anything is possible, even getting off for rape.
I honestly thought that it was a rather poor analogy.
From a legal and moral standpoint I equate a rapist to a driver who instead of hitting the brakes hard or attempts to swerve around the person when he spots a person playing in the middle of traffic, instead chooses to push down decisively on the accelerator and aim straight for the playing person, with the explicit intention of running them over.
If a person gets run over after they went playing in the middle of traffic, despite the driver doing everything in his or her power to avoid running that person over, then that would make it an accident.
There is no such thing as an accidental rape.
The car and traffic analogy is just another way of saying that a woman's actions and/or behavior is a contributing factor to her rape.
The analogy bothers my on another level too. Almost any reasonable person would acknowledge that playing in the middle of traffic is a decision that carries a significant amount of risk.
Comparing that to a woman going to a party in a form-fitting dress and drinking alcohol and talking to men and trying to make it seem that the risks are similar and comparable, paints a very ugly picture of the what level of decency, trustworthiness and morality we have the right to expect of men. Do we hold them in such low regard? Are they that lacking in moral fibre? Is the default position that men should be regarded as potential rapists?
Personally, I love and respect the men in my life. I will not let a minority of deviants out there in the world dictate how I live my life. I will not accept that I have to curtail my freedom in order to "be safe" from individuals who are by definition criminals.
Well, your analogy works.
All I'm saying is we shouldn't link "Be safe out there" with "If you don't you deserve what you get".
I'm ok with telling my kids to be safe.
It doesn't excuse a rapist.
In my mind, I'm making two totally different and unrelated comments.
As an aside - Personally, if one of my sons did this, I would not be writing a letter to the public. I would be kicking his orifice and telling him he was wrong. I'd be heartbroken over it all of course, but I wouldn't excuse him just because he was my son. He'd have to make amends somehow. And get some psychological help to ensure this didn't ever happen again.
And if she would let me, I'd be tempted to reach out to the victim. Otherwise, I'd give her privacy and wouldn't make my own thoughts public.
Good point. I'll follow up with my friend to find out exactly where she heard this.
Double jeopardy applies only in courts of the same level. If you're tried in a state court , you can't be retried. Doesn't apply to a federal court. If they can assert jurisdiction , then can retry you.
Don't ever force feed a person tea...even if they said they wanted it before, if they've now changed their mind, don't pour the tea down their throat. And no matter what they said before, even if they drank the tea in the past, if they are unconscious, don't give them tea...because unconscious people don't want tea.
Don't act all equal then dare to admit women have been attacked???
No one is saying women should be stupid. No one is saying women shouldn't do things that cut down their risk of being assaulted. We are saying women don't cause rape. We are saying that when rape happens, it is the fault of the rapist. We are saying women shouldn't have to modify, limit, and shrink their entire lives because of constant fear of attack.
How many times do we have to say that modifying your own behavior doesn't stop rape? How many? All it does is shift who is the most vulnerable. There will ALWAYS be someone who is vulnerable and there will always be men who rape. Focusing on women's behavior instead of rapists' gives a free pass to predators. and the culture that enables them and increases the blame directed toward women who weren't "good" victims.
Rape isn't getting hit by a car while you're in the street. It's getting hit by a car while you're on the sidewalk.
Thats not what I am saying. I am saying don't act like superwoman in one breath and a damsel in distress in the next. The type of woman who competes with men on every level and insists on being treated the same and then wants a man to open doors and lift boxes. It is hypocrisy.
By the logic used in the second quote you must not lock your car or home up because robberies will happen and focusing on home and car safety gives the robbers a free pass. Telling women to act more responsibly and addressing predators is not mutually exclusive but that is what I am hearing. It is all the rapists fault and being drunk and impaired in a strange place should be irrelevant. I am sure the victim is this case feels very justified that she had a right to be drunk in public. I am sure she will do it again because she has a right to do so without being harmed by some creep. Even if the driver or the rapist are 100% wrong it will be little consolation to you when you are the victim.
naomi12397
1 Post
I think it is disgusting that he is going to county jail for 6 months after being convicted of three felonies. I would say I feel for his mother and father for loving their son, but I don't. His family was arrogant and showed no remorse for the victim and tried to make the boy out to be the victim. I don't see any significance in him registering as a sex offender or not being able to go to the olympics...Most people don't get HALF the opprotunities that he gets. I refuse to feel sorry for some rich kid that rape's a girl behind a dumpster especially when truthfully, he had so much going for himself and probably could have hooked up with a girl, with her consent, if he wanted to.
Another thing about this case that pisses me off to no end is the fact that people are convicted of crimes that they did not commit everyday and serve time in prison as criminals. That is wrong and is not fair. It shows that with the right amount of money anything is possible, even getting off for rape.