Today's funny

Specialties School

Published

So I have a student with really severe allergies this year. Sensitive to ingestion, contact, and inhalation of peanuts and treenuts. Also has asthma so he comes to my office daily to take his inhaler before PE. I always chat and joke with him.

So today...

Severely allergic kid: Hi! Do you know what time it is??

Me: Peanut butter jelly time?

Severely allergic kid: ...that would be awful.

Me: Oh, yeah. My bad. But good for me! :)

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Just had a boy come in with complaint of head ache and seeing unicorns.

Kid: Is that normal?

Me: only if you live in a land far, far away, or on XYZ street

Kid: That's my street

Me: I know, I had to stop for a herd of unicorns crossing this morning just past your house.

Kid: You know I was just joking around

Me: I was serious!

Kid walked out after taking his meds giggling

Teacher called wanting to know what I have that kid, he came back talking about unicorns...I know NOTHING!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Community Health/School Nursing.

I have a bathroom in my clinic. I had to go pee. I was getting ready to flush when I heard kids walk into my clinic and say, "She isn't in here...let's go look for her." I never moved. I was like a ninja. They left. Let the game Marco Polo begin!!

Also, a kindergartner today asked me if I was an expert of the body and I said, "I think a doctor is more of an expert than a nurse." She yelled out, "I had surgery on my butt!" Perfect! Oy vey.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in School nursing.
I have a bathroom in my clinic. I had to go pee. I was getting ready to flush when I heard kids walk into my clinic and say, "She isn't in here...let's go look for her." I never moved. I was like a ninja. They left. Let the game Marco Polo begin!!

My students just scream my name through the bathroom door. I can never pee in peace.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Community Health/School Nursing.
My students just scream my name through the bathroom door. I can never pee in peace.

Yes! lol Most of the time they will stand by the door and knock. I'm pretty sure I come out of that bathroom like a banshee ready hurt someone.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in school nursing; pediatrics.

You all are brave - with the way my kiddos pee all over the place, I wouldn't use the bathroom in my health office unless I had on a hazmut suit! Luckily, one of the staff bathrooms is close by.

Obviously, I go in there periodically with Lysol wipes and spray and clean it but I still won't use that bathroom. Besides, aren't we as nurses never supposed to take the time to pee or eat? LOL

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in school nursing, ortho, trauma.

love it, Farawyn, i had a rough night -i needed a kick start this morn.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ICU, HIV, Peds (last 30 Yrs<;o).

I had a kindergartener with a persistent stomach ache yesterday---not a frequent flyer, so I was trying to decide if he could try to make it to the end of the day or if I needed to send him home.

Me: "How do you usually go home?"

Kid: "Usually with a headache"

Me: "..........Me too".

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in School nursing.
I had a kindergartener with a persistent stomach ache yesterday---not a frequent flyer, so I was trying to decide if he could try to make it to the end of the day or if I needed to send him home.

Me: "How do you usually go home?"

Kid: "Usually with a headache"

Me: "..........Me too".

I went home with one yesterday.

I cured it with wine.

:smug:

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Peds, Oncology.
I went home with one yesterday.

I cured it with wine.

:smug:

I have a date with Mr. Moscato tonight. ;)

Up Vote Up Vote ×
I never moved. I was like a ninja. They left. Let the game Marco Polo begin!!

:roflmao:

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Add a Comment