Nursing Student Peers Who Want to Mooch

[katiejames7878]

Hi everyone,

I have a question. I am in nursing school and study very hard to make good grades. A small group of my friends and I spend time splitting up material and making study guides and having study groups. We work well together and stay on task while studying. We also work hard and as a result we do not get to spend as much time with our spouses, children, family, and significant others as we would like to.

Each semester near finals, we have people asking us to share our study guides and materials that we have worked so hard to make each semester while they have been partying, hanging out with others, and etc.

We do not want to share our hard work with other people in our cohort who are not willing to work hard themselves or contribute to the work. These people just want to mooch off us at the end of the semester when they are stressing that they won't pass their classes.

Is it wrong of us to feel this way? What is a polite and respectful response to these classmates? And how can we say no when they ask to be invited to study groups?

Does anyone else have this problem?

Thank you

[Rose_Queen, BSN, MSN, RN]

Welcome to AN!

This thread is along the same lines as what you are experiencing and may provide the advice you seek.

[traumaRUs, MSN, APRN]

Moved to General Nursing Student

[la_chica_suerte85, BSN, RN]

I would say something along the lines of, "My notes are kind of hard to understand since they're a work in progress throughout the quarter. They kind of connect with everyone else's notes. It's a 'you have to be there to get it' kind of situation. You're welcome to join us next semester if you want."

And, no, you're perfectly entitled to feel that way. Some people are more mature, some people are less mature. It takes all kinds, I'm told. You don't have to bother with looking out for anyone other than yourself so don't worry about it.

[Purple_roses]

I don't think it's wrong for you to withhold the study guides. One woman in my class went on a rant and actually blamed those who were doing well this semester for other people failing out already. She said "where were you when so and so was failing?!" For the record, "so and so" never once spoke to me, nor did I know that "so and so" was failing.

You are responsible for yourself and yourself alone. I share notes with people who share notes with me. For instance, I'll go through and take thorough notes over the reading, while my study buddy will take thorough notes over the powerpoint, then we swap and combine them. That's fair. Throwing another student over your shoulder and carrying him or her across the finish line is not fair.

[nlitened]

Be honest. Tell them they did nothing to contribute to the group, therefore they will not be getting your study guides or will be invited into the study group. Enough said.

It's not wrong to feel how you do.

[OcMurse93]

Just be honest and state the facts. They haven't been part of your study group all semester, they are trying to use the tools you created after many hours of hard work, and they are doing a disservice to themselves. They won't be prepared for the NCLEX unless they actually put the work in. Mooching off of your study guides isnt fair to you, and adding them to the study group isnt fair to whomever is going to be picking up the slack if they don't contribute.

[AspiringNurseMW]

I'm not saying you shouldn't, you have every right not to, just offering my experience.

I share my notes freely. I think in part because a big way I learn is by teaching others, and I now purposely make my study guides that are geared towards sharing. I don't mind sharing my study guides because they are not going to be enough to get a slacker to pass. In the end, NCLEX style questions are still primarily critical thinking, you can't answer all the SATA, priority, and delegation questions based on my study guides alone. I created a Facebook group with about 20-30 classmates who are active on it, I share all my study guides there.

Again, this is just me. I am somewhat selective though with who I do study groups with, and at this point in the semester, the people who are not doing so hot, are usually the no shows anyway, even if they were invited.

[la_chica_suerte85, BSN, RN]

I don't think it's wrong for you to withhold the study guides. One woman in my class went on a rant and actually blamed those who were doing well this semester for other people failing out already. She said "where were you when so and so was failing?!" For the record, "so and so" never once spoke to me, nor did I know that "so and so" was failing.

Oh what a bleeding heart....

[selectallthatapply]

This is something that I've been trying hard to remember/apply: "No." is a complete sentence.

[NICU Guy, BSN, RN]

Everybody has their price. How much is your hard work worth to you? $100/ study guide? LOL

[Zyprexa_Ho]

HELL NO.

It's nice that you care enough to even consider this. Maybe a nice middle ground would be offering for them to join you next semester, but I ain't giving it away for free!!