I have a question. I am in nursing school and study very hard to make good grades. A small group of my friends and I spend time splitting up material and making study guides and having study groups. We work well together and stay on task while studying. We also work hard and as a result we do not get to spend as much time with our spouses, children, family, and significant others as we would like to.
Each semester near finals, we have people asking us to share our study guides and materials that we have worked so hard to make each semester while they have been partying, hanging out with others, and etc.
We do not want to share our hard work with other people in our cohort who are not willing to work hard themselves or contribute to the work. These people just want to mooch off us at the end of the semester when they are stressing that they won't pass their classes.
Is it wrong of us to feel this way? What is a polite and respectful response to these classmates? And how can we say no when they ask to be invited to study groups?
"Our study group has an agreement. We split up the subject areas to create our own study guides, then share them with each other. That way we all feel fair about our contributions. If you'd like to join our group next semester, or form a second group doing the same thing, that would be fine."
Either that or figure out how many hours you spent and charge what you think is a fair fee for the guide.
Everybody has their price. How much is your hard work worth to you? $100/ study guide? LOL
That's right, everybody has their price. Last I saw, The College Network was charging about $680 for one study guide that covers the material for only one exam. Don't really think that TCN even gives a majority of that income to the person who wrote the study guide! I am in the camp of those who remind the seekers that they could have been part of the contributing group from the beginning of the term. Emphasis to be on the word, "contributing".
Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.
Say what you mean, mean what you say. Learn it now cause as a nurse you will find this critical.
Yep. I have said to people on more than one occasion, "What part of 'NO' don't you understand?"
Assertiveness is a much-needed skill in nursing school and the real working world of nursing. Learn it now or risk being bombarded by those who view your kindness as weakness.
Not only do you not owe these people your study guide, but you also do not owe them a place in your study group.
I have seen a few posters advising you to tell people that they can join your study group next semester if they want. But...why would you offer that option? It seems like you have a great study group already, composed of people who are putting in the same amount of time and effort as you are. Why would you want to add folks to that group who you know are not up to that level? (If they were, they would have asked you looooong before the end of the semester if they could be in your group.)
If they are serious about reforming their study habits, they can start their own group. There is absolutely no reason for you to admit them into yours. That's like volunteering to take on the student who falls asleep in class every day when it comes to group project time ("Professor, I would love to do the work of two people, as long as my partner profits from my hard work! Please make sure that Sleepy McSleepersons is my partner!") This is a bad idea. Don't do eeeeeet!
"No" is a complete sentence. You don't have to be rude, or rub it in that these people didn't start studying beforehand. "I'm sorry, but our study group isn't open to new people" would work just fine.
You are not wrong. You and your study group partners work hard and sacrifice time and blow off committments you wish you didn't have to. I would be honest. I would say no I'm not giving you my study guide. Theres a book and I'm sure you will find powerpoints and resources to study with. As far as the study group I would also be honest "why would we want somebody in our study group who doesn't do their own work? What can you offer our group". It probably sounds mean but what they are asking of you isn't really nice either.
Specializes in Allergy/ENT, Occ Health, LTC/Skilled.
Honestly, I just say no. I am not cruel about but I generally say " You know I spend hours on these notes and studying, time away from my husband and three small kids, so I don't often give up my hard work for nothing." That usually shuts the moochers up. Most of the time it's people without children or full time jobs asking me so I am thinking hell no then. If I can make the grade, you can too. We had a group project in A+P2 not long ago and one of my group members literally plagiarized so I had to fix it all. She then had the balls to ask for my study notes. That was one time I wasn't so nice.
This is a bad idea. Don't do eeeeeet!
PaulBaxter
145 Posts
How's this for a suggestion:
"Our study group has an agreement. We split up the subject areas to create our own study guides, then share them with each other. That way we all feel fair about our contributions. If you'd like to join our group next semester, or form a second group doing the same thing, that would be fine."
Either that or figure out how many hours you spent and charge what you think is a fair fee for the guide.