I hate my life.....

DA314 · Dec 19, 2008

Maybe you and your family could reduce your lifestyle for 2 years while you go to community college and get an ADN? You would still be an RN, but it would cost considerably less and you'd be done faster.

RN1982 · Dec 19, 2008

Go for an ADN. You can always go back for a BSN later on.

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Dec 19, 2008

But, what am I? Nothing but a wife and mother.

The roles of wife and mother are two of the most important jobs you'll ever fulfill. I'm assured your family unit would crumble to pieces without the thankless labors you place into raising your son and bestowing companionship upon your spouse.

You are something. Don't take your roles so lightly.

nrsang97, BSN, RN · Dec 19, 2008

I agree that you can go to the local community college. You can get your ADN in 2 years vs BSN in 4 years. You can always go back for BSN if you want to at a later time and your employer will most likely pay for it or a portion of it. You may have to work at a specific hospital for 2-3 years but it can be done. The hospital I work for offers a free RN-BSN completion program and it is one night a week for 3 years. You also have to agree to work for the hospital system for 3 years also.

nrsang97, BSN, RN · Dec 19, 2008

The roles of wife and mother are two of the most important jobs you'll ever fulfill. I'm assured your family unit would crumble to pieces without the thankless labors you place into raising your son and bestowing companionship upon your spouse.
You are something. Don't take your roles so lightly.

Commuter is right.

UdonNomi · Dec 19, 2008

Tell hubby to get off the stick and give ya a hand..he was full of energy at one time in your relationship..it's time for him to step up to the plate again. He can make dinner, entertain the kids, give you the time you need to get yourself and your studies together. Marriage is a partnership and you can bet he'll be taking credit when you head to the bank with your new RN paycheck..gently remind him he still "needs" to provide for his family. Neither of you will be sorry, it'll also strengthen your relationship.

pink85 · Dec 19, 2008

I understand your frustration. I got my BSN while having 3 very young children and being married. I was up until all hours studying and crying many nights. You have to keep your head held high and not get down. Be determined! Will the program not let you take stats in concurrance with the program? Some programs will let you do that. You just have a detour not a road block!

nurseby07 · Dec 19, 2008

I am so sorry you're in a rut. I hated the envy I would feel towards the 20 years olds at school who were doing it the "right way".

I went through nursing school as a single mom with two kids.

I now have a great job and love being a nurse, but guess what? Here's my day:

Up at 4- coffee, pack lunches, exercise the dogs because they keep peeing all over the furniture.

Throw that laundry back in the dryer, when dry add to the mountain of clean laundry in my room.

Wake up kids- make sure they finish up homework.

Go to work and care for other people all day.

Come home (if hubby is working one of his 4 12's a week I do dinner)

Make sure kids have done chores, argue with them a while

Check house for new dog pee, pray it's not on mountain of clean laundry

Argue with youngest to please take a shower

Argue with oldest about why he can't be out until 10 with his skateboard friends

Worry about what bills we can pay now or in 2 weeks

Answer phone call from Mom who says "You should care about your elders" (really)

Talk to my girlfriend on phone and complain how working moms never have time for themselves.

By time hubby comes home I'm about asleep..

Of course it's not this bad all the time but some days you do just feel like you're having the life sucked out of you.

Have a bath and some chocolate. Envision your future or you'll be doing this at 37, not 27!

ALso look into Ford Family Scholarships and PEO women's scholarships.

Get some sleep!

Trauma Columnist · Dec 19, 2008

Hang in there. I waited till my kids were 5 and 10 before going back to school. It was not fun - I did change jobs to work as a unit secretary on night shift. I sacrificed a lot of sleep doing this but it gave me the chance to go to school and get my pre-reqs during the day when most of them were offered. It also helped that I worked (usually) Thurs/Fri/Sat so since hubby was home during this time, he could take care of the kids.

I know its frustrating to have to wait...I'm sorry you are having to go thru this.

Jullydjen · Dec 19, 2008

I wish I could give you a hug, cause I know how you feel!! I have also had a very long road to reaching my goal, and I'm not there yet. I know what it's like to have to keep plugging away at a job I hate, racking up debt, deal with the daily grind, and trying to be a wife and mom to 2 preteens and a preschooler.

I decide to pursue my ADN at the age of 28, after I had my last child. I had fantasized about it for years. I was put on a 2 year waitlist and I was so frustrated at first. I did the math and realized that I wouldn't graduate until I was 32, and at the time it seemed so far off in the future. After awhile, I decided to just make the most of it, and use my time wisely - I took classes and started to put my house in order to prepare for nursing school. It has been a long haul, but I will graduate this spring, and in retrospect, the time flew by, and 32 no longer seems old to me.

I am saying this to let you know that you are not alone. Things won't magically get better once you are in nursing school either, actually they may get worse for a time because of all the stress and drain on your time, money and energy. Your family will say they support you, but will act out because you have other priorities besides them. Take it in stride. But you can do it, you just have to take it one day at a time, one hour at a time if you have to. You may consider taking a few classes to help boost your GPA a bit, while you are waiting to begin the nursing program (maybe you are already doing this). You will get there, it doesn't matter when, as long as you get there. You have your whole life ahead of you :)

BabyLady, BSN, RN · Dec 19, 2008

I've been wanting to be a nurse be a nurse for so long now. But, what am I? Nothing but a wife and mother. I wake up; get ready for work; get my son ready for school; go to work at a boring insurance company; pick up my son from school; stop at the grocery store; cook dinner; help my son with his homework; wash a few loads of clothes; clean & organize; go to school; and try to make time to study. My gpa sucks because I can't study as much as I need because I have so much other crap to deal with. I make time for everyone else except ME! When am I going to get a break and take time out to pursue my dreams? I have $15K in student loans currently, and have no degree. We make to much for me to get financial aid and because our bills are souring out of control, I have to work fulltime. I was accepted to BSN program and was supposed to start this Jan but because I had trouble with Stats, I had to postpone NS until 2010. I am so depressed right now, it's unbelievable. My situation might seem like nothing (some may say it's "the norm") but I'm tired. Tired of putting everyone's feelings, needs, and wants ahead of mine. All I wanna do is go to school for a couple of years, get my degree, then come back (mentally) and be the wife and mother that I'm supposed to be. Life sucks.
I want to flip the script a little bit and encourage all of my young, single, girls and guys, to do IT while you can. Please do not wait until you are dealing with familyhood and decide to go back to school (nursing school at that!) I've read so many post on here where folks have worked 2 jobs, had 4 boys, went to school fulltime, and graduated with a 4.0. Well good for you! I envy you. I wish I could.

I think it's time that you had a long talk with your husband and turned your pursuit into a FAMILY project.

There is no reason why you should do all of the laundry, cleaning, cooking, grocery shopping and pick your son up every day.

Nursing school takes sacrifices on the behalf of EVERYONE. I'm not sure how old you children are, but if they are older than 7, then I can show you two children that can be given a list of chores to do when they get home.

As a wife and mother, you absolutely, 100% do NOT have to do it all.