How can I improve my reputation?

[Gummibear_stare]

Last year, I had multiple health problems and had to take medical leave a few times and eventually go on disability. Last summer I got really sick during my shift at work. I reported to the charge nurse and house supervisor and left. I went downstairs and had labs drawn, urine taken, etc. Turns out I was really sick. The next day my doctor put me on disability. I felt really bad for leaving the floor while taking care of patients. I did call the unit the next day and apologized. I've been a nurse for several years and had never left any unit like that before.

Last month, I returned to work for the first time since last summer. My health is fine now and I'm taking better care of myself. I still work in the same hospital but on a different unit. I was out of work so long I lost my position on my old unit.

While at work a few days ago, an aide told me that she heard co workers from my old unit talking about me when she floated there. A few of my old co workers told her that I just walked off of the unit last summer and are surprised that I was hired again.

I feel a little hurt about hearing this. I was really sick that day and had never left a unit during my shift before during my entire work career. These old co workers didn't tell the aide that I was sick that day. They told her that I just walked off. I've never been written up, have always received good work reviews, and have been described as "thorough", "team player", "kind". Now, I think I have a little bit of a bad reputation.

My manager from the old unit was understanding about the situation and wanted to hire me back when she had an opening. It's just some of my old co workers that dislike me. How can I build my reputation? How can I let them know I was really sick? I have medical documents to prove it. I'm saddened that some of my old co workers feel this way about me and are telling people from the new unit that I work. I've taken steps to take care of my health so that I never have to leave during a shift again or have to take disability. Prior to last year I had good attendance too.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

Bear in mind that those who know the whole story may not disclose it due to confidentiality. Co-workers only know what they saw.

This!

As long as you're getting along with your new co-workers, who cares what the CNA says the old ones are saying about you? Just work hard, be reliable and let your work speak for itself.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

"Boy, it sure is good to be back. I got so sick suddenly that I had to leave in the middle of a shift, and I felt terrible about it. I was so glad when Ms. Nursemanager said she'd take me back when I recovered, and I am happy to see you all again now that the position has opened up."

End of story.

Good advice from GrnTea, as usual.

[CCRN2BE]

While at work a few days ago, an aide told me that she heard co workers from my old unit talking about me when she floated there.

There's a name for people like this..........................**** stirrers.

What enjoyment they get out of bringing others down I will never understand.

[LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN]

There's a name for people like this..........................**** stirrers.

What enjoyment they get out of bringing others down I will never understand.

THIS.

How to you know that they REALLY were talking about you-and why care?

How to you improve your reputation?

By being consistently competent and confident in your nursing practice, the respect will follow, and being "liked" is secondary.

Best wishes.

[Hygiene Queen]

That CNA did you no favor in telling you what she did.

There was absolutely no reason or benefit in you knowing that.

That CNA did not give you that information as a "friend" who "thought you might need to know".

That CNA gave you that information because it was, in some sick way, exciting for her to give you that juicy tidbit.

There is nothing for you to do with that information... nothing you can do to correct it, change it, get justice... not a damn thing.

What a nasty and ignorant thing for her to do.

[NursesRmofun, ASN, RN]

Gummibear_stare, I think you are reading into this way too much. As someone else said, if time passes, the talk will stop. It probably already has. It might have been mentioned and unjustly, but I am sure they are not constantly thinking about it or even often thinking of it...it was just something they decided to say to pass the time or to gossip. I wish you wouldn't worry about it....

As for getting people to like you, it is just going to make you miserable, IMO. Some will like you, some won't. Pick your battles, but stick up for yourself when needed. You will probably make new comrades after a while, and they will help you get through. If not, my best advice is...don't take it home with you! Maybe a therapist might help too. Couldn't hurt!

[hppygr8ful, ASN, RN, EMT-I]

Ok so I'm going to quote my daddy again and say put up a "No Vacancy Sign" and don't let people rent space in your head.

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

I feel embarrassed about last year's incident. I felt weak and like a failure. I was hoping I could start over again. Now, I'm thinking I should put in my two weeks notice and never show my face in that hospital again. People don't forget. They obviously really dislike me since they are telling people I just walked off. How can I get people to like me? I wonder who told this aide this.

I have not read all the other posts as of yet, but I had to get my fingers flying for this one...

DON'T YOU DARE quit over this foolishness!! In 2 weeks they will be gossiping about some other poor nurse.

You are ill, and the facility and your caretakers have the obligation to keep that private. And thankfully, they did an amazing job, as no one knew you were ill, and the nature of your illness. And actually, what might be something cool is that in the newsletter than introduces new employees (and ones who have come back in a different position) you could say something like "I am so humbled that each and every nurse, doctor, aide, and ancillary staff member who took care of me while I was battling and finally overcoming a very serious illness last year, I was able to come back to work--and not a soul knew why I left!! That says so much about patient dignity and privacy!!"

Otherwise, stay out of the gossip, and should you go back to your old unit, and at this point, why bother if you like your new digs a general "I am glad to be back! I was so ill that at times I never thought I would work again!!"

Seriously, a multi year nurse they should know better than you would just get up and leave. They do, but it is oh so much more juicy to talk smack to everyone who will listen. Apparently they are the only unit in the facility that doesn't have impossible patient ratios!?!?!?!

Best wishes and head held high. NO need to be embarrassed, feel weak, failure.....we are all human.

And people will like you in your personal life. At work, the only one who has to "like" you are your patients.

[imintrouble, BSN, RN]

I've been diagnosed with social anxiety. I think I come across as socially awkward. People want the nurse that's good with others. I try to fake it. Strangely, some patients actually like me and my managers have never had issues with me. I'm not good with people. It takes more than being nice. There's something "off" about me. The way I feel about myself doesn't help either. The more bad stuff I hear about myself the angrier I get at myself and the harder I try to appear normal. I don't think I come across as natural and comfortable with people. I've been trying for years and I'll keep trying. I'm so mad at myself.

I stopped reading at this post. It makes me sad when people who are different can't accept themselves for who they are. It's pointless to wish we were different.

It doesn't happen overnight, but the best thing you can do is accept yourself, warts and all.

Get comfortable in your skin. When you like who you are, the opinions of others will matter less. Eventually they won't matter at all.

I always say the only opinions I value are the ones held by people I like and admire. I suspect those nasty nurses are neither of those things.

[NurseDirtyBird]

I'm an introvert, kinda awkward and have social anxiety (amongst other things). I am not a "people person;" I got a check-minus on the "plays well with others" part of all my school report cards. But I'm a good nurse. I've never been real friends with people at work, never socialized with coworkers outside of work or anything, and I don't care. I don't go to work to make friends. If it's affecting your ability to work with the team, that's a problem. But if you're still working well enough with others and getting your job done...well, my usual thought is **** 'em. I'm sure you've heard the old saying, "living well is the best revenge." So do that. Do your job in a way that's beyond reproach. You had a legitimate reason to have walked off the floor at that time, and all the gossipy wieners can do is speculate, guess, and spread it around. They're wasting a bunch of time on that useless crap, while you're using that time to do a fantastic job and continually improve.

[calivianya, BSN, RN]

I have just got to ask - what's your social life like outside of work? I know that's a personal question, but I think it's relevant. I personally always need someone in my corner. I have found that since moving in with my significant other, I care less about what my coworkers think because I know I have someone backing me up. When I lived 400 miles away from him, I cared about interactions with my coworkers more. If you cultivate more meaningful relationships outside of work, that might just help your work anxiety some. Work so you can live well outside of work; don't make work your whole life.

[Tenebrae, BSN, RN]

I have anxiety as a result of clinical depression. I've spent the last three days in a constant state of twitch the anxiety has been that bad. Do you have a therapist or other such person to help you deal with the social anxiety?.. Anxiety can be debilitating.

Focus on doing your job to the best of your abilities. Be the best nurse you can be. Also, learning how to be ok in your own skin is one of the most empowering things you can do. If people are going to dis you for something that is outside of your control eg being sick, why would you want those people to have a place of influence in your life anyway.

Your managers obviously have confidence in your abilities or they would not have taken you back

Most importantly be kind to your self as well