So this is like a vent/help I've got here. So I have a co worker that I feel has crossed the line with her remarks and I'm not entirely sure how to handle it. She was only hired about a month ago and it seems as if she took an immediate disliking to me, and in all honesty due to the nature of her comments I believe her disliking comes from the fact that I'm male.
Within her first week on the job she point blank asked me, in front of other co workers some of whom are very good friends of mine, if I hit women. This was after she had walked in on me and a female coworker who's also a good friend horsing around during a break. I answered the question and my friend took up for my defense, however she refused to drop the issue for weeks. I have never hit a women in my life and didn't like being accused of such especially by someone I barely know.
That was the first comment but today I feel as if she really crossed the line. My best friend and his family were in town visiting this weekend and stopped by the hospital on their way out to say goodbye. My best friend has three beautiful children, two girls and a boy to which I'm the God father. Well apparently this woman saw me with them and used it as another way to attack me. When I came back in she passed a comment in front of several coworkers and my supervisor that I 'seemed a bit too close with that little girl' which must have been a reference to me carrying my oldest God daughter outside.
Now that comment really set me off because I'd die for those kids, I love them dearly and I also have my own child on the way so for anyone to imply I'd hurt a child really upsets me. Another thing is her making a comment like this in front of co workers and my supervisor could very well hurt me professionally. I work in ER now but have worked in Peds ER and I'm currently in school to get my NP in Pediatrics.
Maybe I'm over reacting by being so upset but it seems as if she's trying to professionally sabotage me. Now I've dealt with hostile co workers but never like this woman, has anyone else every dealt with a hostile co worker of this nature? How do you handle it while maintaining a civil working environment?
Also make sure you are diligent in your patient charting/wasting of narcs and anything else she could set you up for. She is out to get you and is just getting started. Watch your back!! and Best of Luck!!
And yet another good reason to go to your manager with this! I would not waste anymore time going to your manager...there's no telling what she's thinking of saying/doing next. Good luck!!!
Agree on all accounts. This wasn't what I expected when I read the word "snide" in the thread title. These aren't snide remarks, they're malicious. I can easily see her behavior escalating to outright accusations, whether it's about your interactions with patients, or with her. You need to get your manager, whoever is above THEM (so they are less familiar with each of you), and an HR rep in a meeting.
This woman sounds like she's completely off the planet.
Some good advice here, I would not let this one go because the comments are intolerable. To insinuate that you are physically abusive to women, a child molester, what will it be next?
My advice is DO NOT EVER BE ALONE WITH HER. Make sure there is a third person around at all times. Someone who can make these sorts of wild accusations like that sounds likely to accuse you of sexual harassment or something.
Please go to your management over this. Write a formal letter of complaint to hospital administration, start documenting everything. The nasty comments were also made in front of other people so it's not like it's going to be your word against hers. Please let your management know who also heard the remarks.
I noticed you are Southern - being from the South I know you are taught to just smile and make nice. Do not make nice and do not feel badly about it. Absolutely write everything down and go to HR immediately. I agree that you must nip this in the bud as someone else put it.
In response to another poster who asked if you are misunderstanding perhaps a warped sense of humor - the answer is no - the comments whether meant to be funny or not have already crossed the line. Good luck -
Ditto to what all of the above posters have said. She is dangerous, she is a threat to your professional reputation and livehood. What a very unhappy and sad person she must be. Take action with management now!! Best of luck to you.
Hugs to you.:icon_hug:I'm very sorry that you're experiencing this. Is the co-worker a nurse or CNA? Regardless, this is slander and you need to set up a meeting with administration about this.
I agree with the other posters about documenting everything, and filing a report. Definitely set up a meeting with managers and HR. Also, do not confront this woman. Do not allow yourself to be alone with her. Sounds like she is trying to set you up for something, don't let her.
Wow, sounds like she has some serious issues with men! I would confront her and bring this to the attention of your manager. Let her know you are in no way going to put up with her inappropriate and unfounded accusations (in a nice way of course-oh and privately, but not too private or she might flip out lol!) Don't let her make you paranoid, I'm sure your non-crazy coworkers recognize that she is the one with issues, not you! Crazy ppl have a way of being crazy to more than 1 person-I'm sure she has offended others. Good luck! and congratulations on becoming a dad soon!
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skittlebear
408 Posts
And yet another good reason to go to your manager with this! I would not waste anymore time going to your manager...there's no telling what she's thinking of saying/doing next. Good luck!!!