A nurse who doesn't breastfeed

Twinmom06, ASN, APN · Jun 12, 2014

It's not judge mental, it's the truth, go ahead and just google it. Formula is horrible. I formula fed my first, and yes there are reasons out there to do it, but in most cases it shouldn't be used. To not give your child what nature made for it is sad. Have you done any research to see all the risks for formula feeding before you made that choice? If so then that's your decision. But to do so, I say, is woefully ignorant. I'm not saying if you formula fed your kid you are a bad mom. I'm saying to formula fees your child without knowing the risks of it, as well as the overwhelming benefits to nursing, makes you a dumb mom.

and the benefits of sanity and sleep FAR outweigh ANY breastfeeding benefits if you're driving yourself insane, don't sleep for 48 hours and have a kid attached to your breast 20 out of 24 hours a day. Sorry your bullying someone to breast feed WON'T work. This is the prevailing attitude that make bottlefeeding mothers feel like they need to feed their kids in a closet! Ignorance of others feelings doesn't excuse your "education" of others.

I bottlefed my twins also. They were 3 and 4 lbs at birth (at 36 weeks) and needed 24 cal formula till they were nearly 2 mos old. My areola was larger than my daughter's face and my breasts bigger than her tiny body. My son has an IQ of 165 and is reading at a 7th grade level and doing math at a 9th grade level (at the end of 2nd grade) and my daughter is fit, athletic and thinks on her feet better than some adults. In 8 years I can count the number of times on 1 hand they've been on abx. While this is anecdotal, I want people to realize that bottlefeeding is not evil, and women are not "dumb mom's" for deciding to bottlefeed whether they research the death out of it or not.

lovemyjoblandd · Jun 14, 2014

I gave breastfeeding a very earnest attempt. I had a C/S and my baby was transferred to another hospital. I started pumping after my C/S every 2 hours and saved every drop. I discharged the next day at noon and went straight to the hospital with allllll my 3 cc's of milk hahaha. I went to the hospital (it was across town from my house) 3 times a day to put him to the breast and pumped every 2-3 hours around the clock. I never made more than 1-2 ounces a DAY. My baby was not interested in latching (he was not sick either, but that is a whole different story). He was in the NICU for 5 days. I continue to pump and attempted to latch for 3 weeks. I never felt a let down. I just got frustrated and stopped cold turkey. Never once got engorged or even filled up. I am all for breastfeeding and encourage it, but I also don't think it should be a cause of stress and frustration. Babies do just fine on formula for the most part. Every drop of breastmilk they get is helpful, but like you said, formula is not poison.

duskyjewel · Jun 15, 2014

I admittedly haven't read all the replies in this long thread, but it sure seems to me that for a group of people who want to be respected as practicing in an evidence-based way, there is an inordinate amount of hostility and disregard for breastfeeding, for which there is TONS of evidence that it's the best choice.

hiddencatRN, BSN, RN · Jun 15, 2014

I admittedly haven't read all the replies in this long thread

On another board I post on, we call this HIPPOing: Happily Ignoring Previous Posters' Opinions.

NicuGal, MSN, RN · Jun 16, 2014

I think calling someone a dumb mom is going a bit far.

AmyRN303, BSN, RN · Jun 16, 2014

I think calling someone a dumb mom is going a bit far.

I agree, NicuGal.

SmilingBluEyes · Jun 19, 2014

Please, refrain from name-calling and disrespectful tones. I know how heated debates can be, but we have to rise above this. Besides, you won't change anyone's mind by attacking their character or intelligence. And to the person who did not read the thread, maybe you should. There are a lot of posts supporting the truth that breastfeeding is best.

ktwlpn, LPN · Jun 19, 2014

Now let's talk about circumcision...

AspiringNurseMW · Jun 29, 2014

I will always choose to breastfeed my children. With my last I only pumped once or twice a day (and one of those was always my lunch break). I worked as a manager where I could not afford to take more breaks or longer breaks just to pump. However to say that there are no to little benefits of formula over breastfeeding seems like a statement born out of guilt (or the need not to feel guilt) because although there may be no long term benefits I will always do my best to give my children those short term benefits, however short they are. Formula is always striving to BE like breast milk so obviously it is superior. We do still dont understand breast milk and breast feeding 100% so there have to be benefits that we dont even know of yet. So to brush all of that off saying I had it and I was fine argument IS dumb. We also didnt use to have car seat, you lived, so does that mean that you would have your children without them?

BUT..... people do what they have to do. **** happens and everyone's circumstances are different. I always encourage women to breastfeed and consult LC first before giving it up but you gotta do what you gotta do and its not my business

TSgtRodrigues, BSN, RN · Jun 30, 2014

I did not breast feed my children, and yes I heard all sorts of crap, but my kids, my choice! And they turned out just fine, and healthy.

RNIBCLC · Jun 30, 2014

To those nurses who either chose or were unable to breastfeed, I want you all to know that I believe that breastfeeding is best, however, breastfeeding is not for everybody. The most important thing is to love and enjoy your baby. As an IBCLC, I have supported many new mothers in choosing to bottle feed. There are often many reasons that mothers feel that breastfeeding is not for them. No one should ever be judged for bottle feeding. I would rather a mother bottle feed and enjoy her baby than breastfeed out of guilt and not bond and enjoy her baby. Just MHOP.

Peace

dmw2010 · Jul 1, 2014

I've been doing Labor & Delivery, Post-Partum, & Nursery for 3.5 years now, and I personally don't pass any judgement on whether any mother, nurse or not, breastfeeds. To me, it's none of my business. Breast vs. bottle is only a small component of the bigger picture when it comes to nurturing a child to grow up healthy and strong. I know about the possible "dangers" of bottle feeding (obesity, necrotizing enterocolitis, etc.). But I think, depending on the individual circumstances, breast versus bottle isn't as clear as it may seem.

After sitting through multiple breastfeeding courses, I will readily admit that breast milk is healthier than formula and I teach my patients this as well (partially because I believe it to be so, and partially because I have to tow the company line). However, I also don't believe in a one size fits all way of doing things. I am always deeply suspicious when a person of authority says that I have to do this one certain thing (ie. breastfeeding) and the other way is totally, completely, utterly wrong (bottle feeding), no excuses (lack of lactation, lack of latch, lack of time, lack of support, etc).

That being said, I also believe the following: 1.) Not all mothers are equally blessed with an endless supply of breast milk. Just like some women are infertile, others can't lactate or have a difficult time doing so. 2.) Not all babies learn how to breastfeed effectively. 3.) Not all mothers have an equal opportunity to breastfeed due to time, logistics, etc. 4.) Breastfeeding while taking "most" medications isn't as safe as they say it is. I acquired a medication & lactation reference guide recently, and every time I read the damn thing, I want to chuck it out the window. Is it safe or not?! It oftentimes doesn't give a clear answer, other than to weigh the pros and cons. (And I feel like the L3 category is non-comittal in making that determination, which is where most drugs fall.) 5.) In general, our society and culture don't always support the lactating (or pregnant) mother in pursuit of what is best for her baby. 6.) I don't know why someone who has just had major abdominal surgery (a c-section, an already unnatural event) would want to breastfeed. (If yes, good for her, but if not, am I going to conclude that she doesn't love her baby enough?)

I'm also going to go off on a tangent. I fully support any mother who wants to breastfeed in public as oppose to a bathroom stall. But reality is reality. You can't take your baby to work, and not all work places offer the time or sanitation to pump. As a RN on a busy labor & delivery unit, I can't imagine ever having the time to pump breastmilk (even once) AND eat AND go to the bathroom when necessary. (After all, you have to take care of yourself to better care for others, and that's not selfish.) Also, whether or not your nurse coworkers even like you is probably a big factor in whether or not they'll give you a break to go pump. (Women oftentimes don't support each other, even when they know better.) Night shift has nothing to do with breastfeeding except to say that working 3 nights a week, 12 hour shifts, and bottle feeding is probably stressful enough as it is. Many women don't have the opportunity to not work. I don't have children, but I've seen the challenge with my own eyes.

We also all can't be the CEO of Yahoo, skip nearly all of maternity leave, and put a personal nursery and nanny beside our offices.

When I have children, I plan on trying out breastfeeding, giving it a valiant effort, given that I don't have any contraindications for doing so. But if I give it up, so be it. If you figured out how breastfeed, despite a crazy busy life and flat nipples, I applaud you. But let's not demonize the bottle, because not all of us have the equal opportunity to breast feed effectively.