Your Marital Status: It's Just Not That Difficult

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.

we've had a rash of it this week -- people claiming to be the spouse of the patient when they are not. really, i'm not making moral judgements about your living arrangements -- i just need to know who is the legal next of kin when we go to get consent for that procedure. it is not at all helpful if you repeatedly tell me that "i'm jean's husband" when you know you're not, jean's mother knows you're not, jean's children know you're not and even the neighbor lady who brought in those flowers knows you're not jean's husband. believe me, someone is going to let it slip sooner or later and then we won't trust you any more.

it really isn't that difficult. if you're heterosexual, either you're married or you're not. (for same sex couples, it's not so cut and dried, although i never seem to have thise issues with same sex couples.)

you're alfred's wife in every way except you don't have that piece of paper from city hall, and everyone knows it's the love in your heart that's more important than any piece of paper -- not married.

you haven't lived with percival in six months since you caught him with that floozy from the neighborhood diner, but neither of you has gotten around to filing for divorce -- married.

you're the second or seventh wife in a polygamous family -- not married.

you've always meant to get married, but never discussed it and now lovebunny is comatose -- not married, and believe it or not, you're not the fiance, either.

you've been married for 36 years and now agatha has alzheimer's and is living in a nursing home and some doctor calls you for consent to put in a feeding tube and your live-in girlfriend is upset because she doesn't want you visiting agatha -- sorry dude, you're married. suck it up and make some decisions.

come on, people. it just isn't that difficult.

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Specializes in ER.

Does common law marriage count in your hospital? Some of ours say they're married, but just mean common law.

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This got so complicated in Pennsylvania that our legislators did away with the designation, "common law". In Pa you either have the paper or you got nothing.

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Specializes in AA&I, research,peds, radiation oncology.

Percival, LoveBunny, Agatha!!! Sorry but I'm LOTF LMAO!!!!:rotfl: :hpygrp:But I TOTALLY agree with you!!!!

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
does common law marriage count in your hospital? some of ours say they're married, but just mean common law.

no common law here in this state -- you either have the piece of paper (married) or you don't (not married).

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Specializes in Utilization Management.

I understand why they do it. The HIPPAA laws have gotten providers so crazy that three weeks ago, my husband had to give a written OK for the doc to discuss DH's medical info with me. We've been married over 20 years.

Now imagine you're not able to discuss the information with the medical personnel and getting an explanation by a sedated patient about what procedures and tests they had and what lifestyle changes needed to be made.

Believe me, if the info is not forthcoming from the medical providers, miscommunications can lead to real problems.

Maybe it would help if you asked if Patient wanted to share info w/ others first??

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we've had a rash of it this week -- people claiming to be the spouse of the patient when they are not. really, i'm not making moral judgements about your living arrangements -- i just need to know who is the legal next of kin when we go to get consent for that procedure. it is not at all helpful if you repeatedly tell me that "i'm jean's husband" when you know you're not, jean's mother knows you're not, jean's children know you're not and even the neighbor lady who brought in those flowers knows you're not jean's husband. believe me, someone is going to let it slip sooner or later and then we won't trust you any more.

it really isn't that difficult. if you're heterosexual, either you're married or you're not. (for same sex couples, it's not so cut and dried, although i never seem to have thise issues with same sex couples.)

you're alfred's wife in every way except you don't have that piece of paper from city hall, and everyone knows it's the love in your heart that's more important than any piece of paper -- not married.

you haven't lived with percival in six months since you caught him with that floozy from the neighborhood diner, but neither of you has gotten around to filing for divorce -- married.

you're the second or seventh wife in a polygamous family -- not married.

you've always meant to get married, but never discussed it and now lovebunny is comatose -- not married, and believe it or not, you're not the fiance, either.

you've been married for 36 years and now agatha has alzheimer's and is living in a nursing home and some doctor calls you for consent to put in a feeding tube and your live-in girlfriend is upset because she doesn't want you visiting agatha -- sorry dude, you're married. suck it up and make some decisions.

come on, people. it just isn't that difficult.

i love it:yeah: you are willing to tell it like it is and please consider working the prisons. we need more of this:d

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Specializes in ER, OR, PACU, TELE, CATH LAB, OPEN HEART.
we've had a rash of it this week -- people claiming to be the spouse of the patient when they are not. really, i'm not making moral judgements about your living arrangements -- i just need to know who is the legal next of kin when we go to get consent for that procedure. it is not at all helpful if you repeatedly tell me that "i'm jean's husband" when you know you're not, jean's mother knows you're not, jean's children know you're not and even the neighbor lady who brought in those flowers knows you're not jean's husband. believe me, someone is going to let it slip sooner or later and then we won't trust you any more.

it really isn't that difficult. if you're heterosexual, either you're married or you're not. (for same sex couples, it's not so cut and dried, although i never seem to have thise issues with same sex couples.)

you're alfred's wife in every way except you don't have that piece of paper from city hall, and everyone knows it's the love in your heart that's more important than any piece of paper -- not married.

you haven't lived with percival in six months since you caught him with that floozy from the neighborhood diner, but neither of you has gotten around to filing for divorce -- married.

you're the second or seventh wife in a polygamous family -- not married.

you've always meant to get married, but never discussed it and now lovebunny is comatose -- not married, and believe it or not, you're not the fiance, either.

you've been married for 36 years and now agatha has alzheimer's and is living in a nursing home and some doctor calls you for consent to put in a feeding tube and your live-in girlfriend is upset because she doesn't want you visiting agatha -- sorry dude, you're married. suck it up and make some decisions.

come on, people. it just isn't that difficult.

ruby, i luv ya girl!!! love how you tell it like it is!!! families don't get it and really don't get hippa!!!

my all time favorite: "i am janice, john's daughter. i'm an rn and know all about hippa, but i need you to give me information. i won't report you." my standard answer is, "i'm very sorry, but there is a federal privacy law, hippa which prohibits me from giving information to anyone not authorized by the patient". then they continue their tiraid about why they need to get information. one guy told me he was the son and disabled and unable to get in to see dad. funny, next day there he was in his wheelchair with a friend.

please people, just let me do my job and care for your loved one.

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Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
We've had a rash of it this week -- people claiming to be the spouse of the patient when they are not...

Come on, people. It just isn't that difficult.

Sounds like the You may be a redneck. You may be married if...

Although I know, I know, it ain't real funny...

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Specializes in Peds Homecare.

Ruby, I just love your post's!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wish I worked with you, you must be a blast!

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Specializes in LTC, Acute Care.

My state has both common law marriage and same-sex marriage. Go Iowa!

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you're the second or seventh wife in a polygamous family -- not married.

my second wife carries an nso certified copy of our marriage certificate for this reason. it is issued by the shariah court in the philippines and endorsed by the philippine government, the us government only recognizes my first wife; however because of this document she is still protected legally if we divorce (since we are both us citizens).

what would your response be to her?

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