Why is it "legal" for patient to decline male nurses?

Horseshoe, BSN, RN · Feb 28, 2019

On 2/27/2019 at 11:54 AM, Cowboy96 said:
This makes NO sense. SO if a patient was robbed by 3 Latino's at a parking lot outside of Walmart 3 years ago, they have the right to decline any care by a Latinx nurse? This makes no sense, and you logic is flawed.
You can give the same example for any race or ethnicity. NOT all Men/Race/Ethnicity/ Whatever are the same. Grow up.

This is what we call a false equivalency.

Are you going to tell a traumatized sexual assault victim with PTSD to "grow up"? If so, please find another line of work.

Pepper The Cat, BSN, RN · Feb 28, 2019

I have had male pts refuse my assistance with bathing/peri care due to religious reasons. One pt kept refusing my offer to help him shower. I asked him if he would like me to send in the male PSW to help him with a shower and he said yes.

Night__Owl, BSN, RN · Feb 28, 2019

It's simpler than this thread has become. If patients want to refuse care from you because of your gender, your age, your race, or because they just don't like the way your face looks, that's their choice, as are the consequences. You just say ,"I can help you to the bathroom/on the bedpan now, or you can wait until a female employee is available, but it could be up to X amount of time before one is, as they all have their own patients who are just as important as you are. What would you like to do?" If it's something like inserting a foley or checking a cervix, you can also explain the possible medical consequences of waiting for that "other" type of person to be available.

And if the person, for whatever valid or otherwise reason they like, decides those consequences are acceptable, then it isn't on you, so go on about your day.

FolksBtrippin, BSN, RN · Feb 28, 2019

The patient can refuse anyone and no one is going to think poorly of a female patient who wants her Foley inserted by a female.

You can get your panties in a bunch about it, if you want.

But try for a moment to imagine what it will be like when you start demanding to see a lady's private parts so that your equal rights as a male are protected.

Maybe you are smart enough to see how poorly that will go for you, even if you are not humble enough to put the patient's needs above your own.

If you can't get a grip on how outrageous you are being please consider changing your major. Computer science maybe.

LM NY · Feb 28, 2019

Only if it's a male computer. Not every computer wants to reveal its bits.

LM NY · Feb 28, 2019

I remember a male aide who asked me for help with my female patient. The funny thing is, the patient who was in her 70's or 80's did not have an issue with the male aide. It was her son. He was extremely protective and clearly told him he didn't want him cleaning his mother. Point is, stop taking it to heart. You are getting very heated about it and you're still in school. Just relax and focus on practicing those SATA NCLEX styled questions.

bananas1 · Mar 1, 2019

On 2/27/2019 at 3:19 PM, Cowboy96 said:
Background: I'm a senior nursing student (male) and I've had about 3-4 patients my entire nursing school career who refused to have a male nurse come in. For example, today at clinicals, I had a female patient with an order for a Foley before discharge, and she told my preceptor for me to leave the room. Another example, during my 2nd semester, I experienced 2 different occasions where the patient refused to have any care by a male whatsoever.
I feel like that is literally like a White couple coming into a restaurant and refusing service from a Black/Latino server and requesting a white server.
Why can't the hospital just say, " If you don't want a male nurses, then leave?" I think it's crazy that in the year 2019, no one bats an eye if a patient refuses care by a male nurse, and the automatic response is " Don't worry! As a male nurse you have to get used to it! ? "

Honestly I think patients have every right to request a certain gender nurse. And especially have the right to refuse a student watching them have an intimate procedure done.

I'm an RN and we had a parent who went biserk over something she misinterpreted and requested only senior nurses to look after her baby. That's fine, no offence taken (it was quite a relief actually lol) but it just meant us young ones couldn't have her.

You can't help your feelings .. but feeling annoyed or offended by this really isn't justified.

0.9%NormalSarah, BSN, RN · Mar 1, 2019

I remember some of the lectures in nursing school where our professors were teaching us that some of us will come across so many people and situations we've never seen before and maybe have a hard time understanding. It is never our job to judge or decide what is best for them, and it is their right to decide who touches them. Shouldn't we all have that right, even if we don't agree on the reason why a person may choose to exercise that right?

It's a little disheartening to see someone only a few years younger than me refer to some of the older and more experienced nurses with such disdain regarding their point of view - 1930s? Come on! Besides, YOU asked. As a nursing student (and this is coming from a VERY recent student!), you may choose to focus on learning from these extremely valuable nurses and learning how to be empathetic toward patients without being judgmental. This truly requires a special personality, and not everyone has it. Some people figure that out in nursing school or beyond...

wannabeny · Mar 1, 2019

On 2/26/2019 at 9:19 PM, Cowboy96 said:
Procedures such as putting in a Foley?
Why can't the hospital just say, " If you don't want a male nurses, then leave?"

Because I am a survivor of long-term childhood sexual abuse and a near assault at 20. I refuse care from any male health professionals.

Not to say they aren't competent, caring people. But that is the way my twisted mind works. Male = sinister motive.

If you have to ask yourself why a patient may be uncomfortable with foley insertion maybe you need to review fundamentals ?

Or let's put it in the perspective of guy: a girl you really don't know nor like, is making constant advances on you and gets offended that you politely refuse her advances. That wouldn't annoy you, that she doesn't respect your boundaries? Same with patients.

Emergent, RN · Mar 1, 2019

17 hours ago, moretonel said:
Cowboy, I have a question that I hope you honestly answer. Say you personally have a 7 year old daughter, and you need a babysitter, would you allow a teenage boy to be alone with your theoretical 7 year old daughter alone for hours? I think it's safe to say 99.999% of mothers would NOT.
I know it's not an exact comparison, but you may get the point.
Please, post your answer.

I had some wonderful male babysitters growing up. But then again, there was the one who showed me his member and then stuck a ballpoint pen into my lady parts. Fortunately I told him to stop because it hurt, and he did. I was 5 years old.

LM NY · Mar 1, 2019

41 minutes ago, Emergent said:
I had some wonderful male babysitters growing up. But then again, there was the one who showed me his member and then stuck a ballpoint pen into my lady parts. Fortunately I told him to stop because it hurt, and he did. I was 5 years old.

OMG!!! I just want to hug you right now. Reading things like this make me tear up. Real and genuine tears. Which is a huge reason I cannot work in a pediatric unit, as much as my heart desires it. I would have never thought. You are such a strong and amazing contributor to AN. Never in a million years would I have thought there were dark childhood memories. I have two girls and fear for them and I make sure my son knows that girls need to always be respected. He will be a teenager soon, but it's never too early to teach them.

There you go, male nursing student. Do you really need more reasons why you should gracefully bow out of situations when a female patient has refused your care?

usethehaldol · Mar 1, 2019

If you want a work around, perhaps working in a jail or federal prison might be a solution.

I dunno the exact law, its probably in the bill of rights somewhere. In the United States an AOx4 patient in a normal hospital setting can refuse anything and everything. Assuming they have the capacity to make and understand decisions.

Whats wrong with someone telling you they want a male/female nurse instead?

They can be in V-tach and tell you to "get the **** out of my house"

So asking for another nurse based on gender, ethnicity, or religion doesn't seem like that much of stretch.

Im curious, what happens in the situation where there is no other nurse available?