What Was the DUMBEST Request Made By A Patient?

Nurses General Nursing

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Once, I saw a patient in a wheelchair while I was walking to my clinic and she asked me for a wrench. I asked why and she said "I need you to screw in my wheels".

Another one was I was walking out of the building by the information desk, where patients are allowed to make a courtesy call. I was talking to my friend on my cell phone trying to ask where to meet her to get a ride home from work. A patient ran behind me out of the building, into the street to ask me if she can use my cell phone. I turned around and told her to please ask the information desk and she said that she didn't want to be charged any extra money. I was so annoyed, I kept walking.

Was walking in a shopping mall (in uniform) and a patient I remembered ran to me and asked me to weigh her, and then right before I was able to respond, asked me if I can get on the computer and make an appointment for her. I told her I do not walk around with a scale and she will have to call for an appointment because I am off duty.

What's yours?

i've lost track of how many times parents told their scared-to-death and crying kids in the er, "if you don't stop crying and behave yourself (as if being scared about being in the er is misbehavior!), that nurse is going to give you a shot!"

:uhoh3::uhoh3:

when i first started i fumed but didn't say anything. then i grew some cojones and after that i fired right back, telling the now-terrified kids "we don't give shots to punish children, we give them to make them better." i have told those stupid parents, "statements like that are why children are so afraid of going to the doctor, thank you very much!"

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Specializes in ICU, CCU, Trauma, neuro, Geriatrics.

The most "uninformed" request came from a family member, consult for a brain transplant as their loved one had been declared 'brain dead'. They wanted the loved one transferred to another facility a couple hours away as they were sure they did brain transplants there.

I took about 20 mins of reasoning and education for them to finally see that no one would offer a perfectly good brain for transplant.

Thanks for this tread!!!

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.

ccu patient wanted a pass to go home and harvest his marijuana crop. when the pass wasn't forthcoming, he went ama. went home, harvested his crop, drank a 12 pack of budweiser and ate a pizza. was back in ccu before the end of my shift, in chf.

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The most "uninformed" request came from a family member, consult for a brain transplant as their loved one had been declared 'brain dead'. They wanted the loved one transferred to another facility a couple hours away as they were sure they did brain transplants there.

I took about 20 mins of reasoning and education for them to finally see that no one would offer a perfectly good brain for transplant.

Thanks for this tread!!!

Well, looks like there is a donor right there! :lol2:

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ccu patient wanted a pass to go home and harvest his marijuana crop. when the pass wasn't forthcoming, he went ama. went home, harvested his crop, drank a 12 pack of budweiser and ate a pizza. was back in ccu before the end of my shift, in chf.

seriously?? wow - did he think it was worth it???

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
seriously?? wow - did he think it was worth it???

yup! he was real glad he got his cash crop harvested! and he knew he wouldn't get either pizza or beer from us, so . . . .

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yup! he was real glad he got his cash crop harvested! and he knew he wouldn't get either pizza or beer from us, so . . . .

:rolleyes: :rolleyes:

what priorities!!!

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i've lost track of how many times parents told their scared-to-death and crying kids in the er, "if you don't stop crying and behave yourself (as if being scared about being in the er is misbehavior!), that nurse is going to give you a shot!"

:uhoh3::uhoh3:

when i first started i fumed but didn't say anything. then i grew some cojones and after that i fired right back, telling the now-terrified kids "we don't give shots to punish children, we give them to make them better." i have told those stupid parents, "statements like that are why children are so afraid of going to the doctor, thank you very much!"

i've heard of parents using this tactic to keep a child in line at home - "if you don't behave, i'm going to take you to the doctor and have him give you a shot!" then they wonder why their kids are afraid of the doctor, and they think they have done something wrong when they do get a shot, even if it wasn't all that painful.

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Specializes in ICU, School Nurse, Med/Surg, Psych.

I still believe that the dumbest remark I have ever heard is patients appologizing for waking me up when they call for assistance during the night. Good grief!

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Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.

A recent patient must have thought that our facility had world-class chefs, because he was requesting higher-priced food selections such as sirloin steaks, romaine lettuce in all of his salads, white unsalted butter, and other stuff that our kitchen simply did not have.

Of course, there are the pillow-fluffing requests, requests for me to run to the soda machine, and requests for me to hand the pt. the water pitcher or Kleenex box when they were physically able to reach these things without the nurse's help.

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The most "uninformed" request came from a family member, consult for a brain transplant as their loved one had been declared 'brain dead'. They wanted the loved one transferred to another facility a couple hours away as they were sure they did brain transplants there.

I took about 20 mins of reasoning and education for them to finally see that no one would offer a perfectly good brain for transplant.

Thanks for this tread!!!

Should have told them that the 'transplant' would have to come from a close family member!!:lol2::lol2:

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Specializes in EMS, ER, GI, PCU/Telemetry.

we had a patient in ED holding for 2 or 3 days... she always had a male visitor come and bring her in big styrofoam cups full of dirt because she said it was her garden and she was growing watermelons. she was a slightly demented AIDS pt so we were all kinda like whatever if the dirt made her happy. but anyways she had signed out AMA saying that she had to go outside and "plant her watermelon seeds"... so she left with all her dirt cups. EMS found her about a block from the ER unresponsive... her "watermelon seeds" were crack rocks!!

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