I love the thread things you would love to tell your pt and get away with.
But to be truthful for me I love the pts and rarely want to be horrid to them. However I do have lots of things I would like to say to the management and get away with my job. So here are a few things
1/ No you take the extra pt and flex up why should I
2/ Stop sitting on that fat bum and come out here and do some real work for a change.
3/ I wouldnt trust you to help me with my pts because you have no skills left so would be useless
4/ Do you even remember what it was like to work as a floor nurse
5/ Why would I ask you how to do anything you are not upto date and never know the answers
6/ In these days of financial crisis why are you getting an extra shift per week?
Specializes in long term care, alzheimer's, ltc rehab.
what i would have loved to say yesterday:
first, let me set up the scenario. i work in a very busy alzheimer's "assisted living" floor (whoever gave it that title was smoking some crack, but that's a story for a later time lol.) anyhoo...i was running my butt off, helping with meals, toileting people, making beds, the whole bit...nonstop from 6:30 am till 3 when i finally got to sit down and rest my knee cause it was killing me. i no sooner get in the chair when the very lovely (sticks finger down throat and retches) manager sashays out of her office and says (get this) "you need to get up and do something productive."
ummmmm, excuse you? i go past your office before i even get to the patient rooms. did you not see all the work i was getting done since i walked in the door, or did sitting on your butt talking on the phone to god knows who pretending to work while sitting in that great big office cause you to go blind?"
i....ummm...may have come home and beat up on my teddy bear last night. no, i',m not proud.
first, let me set up the scenario. i work in a very busy alzheimer's "assisted living" floor (whoever gave it that title was smoking some crack, but that's a story for a later time lol.) anyhoo...i was running my butt off, helping with meals, toileting people, making beds, the whole bit...nonstop from 6:30 am till 3 when i finally got to sit down and rest my knee cause it was killing me. i no sooner get in the chair when the very lovely (sticks finger down throat and retches) manager sashays out of her office and says (get this) "you need to get up and do something productive."
ummmmm, excuse you? i go past your office before i even get to the patient rooms. did you not see all the work i was getting done since i walked in the door, or did sitting on your butt talking on the phone to god knows who pretending to work while sitting in that great big office cause you to go blind?"
i....ummm...may have come home and beat up on my teddy bear last night. no, i',m not proud.
i would have become very loud at this point. very loud. spare the teddy bear, beat her up.
Specializes in telemetry, med-surg, home health, psych.
what i would have loved to say yesterday:
first, let me set up the scenario. i work in a very busy alzheimer's "assisted living" floor (whoever gave it that title was smoking some crack, but that's a story for a later time lol.) anyhoo...i was running my butt off, helping with meals, toileting people, making beds, the whole bit...nonstop from 6:30 am till 3 when i finally got to sit down and rest my knee cause it was killing me. i no sooner get in the chair when the very lovely (sticks finger down throat and retches) manager sashays out of her office and says (get this) "you need to get up and do something productive."
ummmmm, excuse you? i go past your office before i even get to the patient rooms. did you not see all the work i was getting done since i walked in the door, or did sitting on your butt talking on the phone to god knows who pretending to work while sitting in that great big office cause you to go blind?"
i....ummm...may have come home and beat up on my teddy bear last night. no, i',m not proud.
i agree, spare the teddy bear....you should have spoken up for yourself and let her have it !!!!
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
"no, i will not record my q 1 hour glucose checks on three different forms in two different computer programs. i'm already recording the insulin boluses and insulin drip changes necessitated by the "tight glucose control protocol" on two different forms in two different computer programs, and that's more than enough work -- especially when i have two patients on insulin drips. i don't care that it makes it easier for the research nurses to audit the charts and determine how well our insulin protocol is working. i care about patient care, and the research nurse sitting in her nice, comfortable office chair in her private office can take the time to look it up!"
"if you're really worried about patient care (as opposed to customer service), please enforce the limited visiting hours that we actually have. it's rather difficult to take care of patients with three family members competing for our attention and my chair."
"if you're serious about retaining your nursing staff, especially the "senior nurses," please give some thought to what might make their jobs easier and more tolerable. having to dislodge a rude family member from my chair every time i need to chart something is neither pleasant nor efficient. and standing up for too long makes my right leg go numb and then i sometimes fall over. that tends to alarm the patients, but amazingly not the rude family member who still believes he is entitled to sit in my chair."
"i think it's wonderful that you're asking for nurse input in the choice of a new medical director for our unit. i think it's suspicious, however, that our meeting with the candidates for the position keeps getting postponed."
Today right after change of shift the CNAs on the other hallway asked me if I'd seen Mrs. Whoever's walker. I checked around but didn't see it. I saw them looking everywhere. They couldn't find it. So they put the woman in a wheelchair to bring her to the bathroom and back. Next thing I know the DON is asking if anyone took this woman for a walk. I said no, because they've been looking for her walker. She's like, "well you can't just not take her for a walk all day! Use someone else's walker!" as though we're all stupid and lazy.
Gee, it never occurred to us to use someone else's walker... maybe because when we've done that in the past, we've gotten YELLED AT FOR IT. We just got here and we don't know what the hell happened to her walker but you've been here all day, up everyone's butt nitpicking, so why don't YOU know where it is?
Go AWAY! I just want you to GO AWAY! I work pm's so I don't have to deal with you! When I see you coming down the hall toward me, I just want to run in the opposite direction. You always want something. I'm busy and can barely take the time to listen to you telling me what you want now. Can you not see that I'm busy! Go away and leave me alone. Where did I put that wand of mine?
I'm a tele nurse. There's a difference. If you didn't know there was a difference, why is it policy that they only get 4 patients when they have to float to tele? (While we struggle along with 6-8.) Yet when we float to ICU, we get three, they get two. And don't give me any of that garbage about these "really" being tele patients; if they were tele patients, they'd be on tele.
I will float to Med-surg, however. Even though tele nurses floating to med-surg get a full complement of patients plus we have to oversee the remote tele's. Which means that I have to ignore my 7 patients for up to an hour while I go do chest pain protocol on someone else's patient and often, no one even knows where the EKG machine is kept. Gee. Thanks. Way to go.
You know that we are all so busy that we have to take antihistimines, (because we don't have time to scratch, sorry an IN joke) Why do you come out mid-shift and audit our paperwork and don't stop until you find a fault to pick? Is paperwork so important when we have very acute Pt's? Are the Pt complaints due to our poor staffing and resourcing or do they complain about the paperwork?
Get a grip on reality and give us stafing and the resources to do our job properly and the complaints will drop, taking us away from our Pt's is perpetuating the cycle or are you too dense to get that?
"You're part of the problem! Stop being part of the problem and start becoming part of the solution!" I forget what movie this is from, but it sure fits.
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Mikey31079
82 Posts
what i would have loved to say yesterday:
first, let me set up the scenario. i work in a very busy alzheimer's "assisted living" floor (whoever gave it that title was smoking some crack, but that's a story for a later time lol.) anyhoo...i was running my butt off, helping with meals, toileting people, making beds, the whole bit...nonstop from 6:30 am till 3 when i finally got to sit down and rest my knee cause it was killing me. i no sooner get in the chair when the very lovely (sticks finger down throat and retches) manager sashays out of her office and says (get this) "you need to get up and do something productive."
ummmmm, excuse you? i go past your office before i even get to the patient rooms. did you not see all the work i was getting done since i walked in the door, or did sitting on your butt talking on the phone to god knows who pretending to work while sitting in that great big office cause you to go blind?"
i....ummm...may have come home and beat up on my teddy bear last night. no, i',m not proud.