Members are discussing the topic of family members or partners being allowed to comfort patients in hospital beds. Some members believe it can provide emotional support and aid in the healing process, while others raise concerns about infection control, privacy, and maintaining professionalism. The debate includes personal anecdotes, hospital policies, and differing perspectives on what is appropriate in different healthcare settings.
I just finished a shift, where while giving report, once again the nurse I was reporting to blew a gasket when she discovered that one of the patient's boyfriends was in the bed with the patient. She had the same reaction last week when a patient had her husband in bed with her. She says it is inappropriate and unacceptable. I personally have no problem with it, as long as: they are acting appropriate, the patient wants the visitor in their bed, the patient is not in critical condition, the visitor is not impeding on patient's care, and there are no major open wounds/sources for infection.
I came home today searching all over the internet for some sort of policy guidance as to how other hospitals deal with this sort of thing and found nothing, so I decided to open this thread to see how you all felt about this situation.
Why do we think it's cute when a 90 year old lady curls up with her dying husband so he can finally get some rest, but flip out when its a 20 year old who finds comfort having her partner curled up beside them? Is this a privilidge that only belongs to the married, the dying, the heterosexual adult norm? What about the lesbian or gay couple... if you create a policy that says "married or spouses" then you've just excluded that population. It seems too situation specific to create a broad policy i.e. the reasons I stated above as contraindications or things like hospice or new baby as "acceptable".
But the problem comes that when there isn't a policy in place, and you have inconsitency in nursing judgement patient's get an unclear message. I can guarantee you that after I leave, that nurse will go in the room, chastize the visitor and make him get out of the bed. Then, I come on in the morning and suddenly it's okay? Mixed messages for sure.
My feelings are that allowing the visitor to share the bed with patient in "appropriate situations outlined above", regardless of marital status, sexual orientation, etc. the patient has the RIGHT to share their bed. It goes within the core values of nursing... THE RIGHT TO AUTONOMY, NON-MALEFICIENCE (damage their level of comfort or security and trust by being told no one can be in their bed) and BENEFICIENCE (if the patient is able to benefit from the comfort of the closeness of a loved one, a stuffed animal, a pet, (without causing harm) then it is our duty to respect this opportunity for improved outcomes.
Honestly, there's only been 2 nurses I've met who have problems with this. They both were super conservative, had some control issues, very opinionated, and were very outspoken. What are your thoughts on whether it is appropriate or not, or whether policies should be put in place? ~MN RN
I don't have a problem with it, unless the pts medical condition makes it dangerous for them or the other person. I will say that in school we were taught that pts have the right to have sex in their room if they want to . We were taught that there is no law against it and as adults they are allowed to make that decision. That is a little bit creepy to me, but I certainly don't have a problem with people lying in bed together. I know when I'm sick, the thing that comforts me the most, is having my husband's arms around me.
I disagree that they have the "right" to have sex in the room...there may not be a rule against it or against the law, but as a profession of mostly women, I find it very, very offensive that I have to worry about walking in on that.
In our NICU private rooms, parents are told it is not appropriate..the room is for the patient, not them.
Actually, having another person in the bed makes you liable for that person. They trip, fall out, hit their hands on the handrail, etc etc etc, the company and your licensor may be asking you why 2 people were in a sick bed built for one. Our policy is strict against it.
What if the pt decides to sit in the chair and their spose sits on the foot of bed? Does that change your liability for that person? Also, what if the family member comes in and slips on the floor? My point is, isn't their enough liability by the family member just being there? I would think that their being in the bed does not really add a whole lot more to the situation.
I am totally shocked with all of your responses!!!!! When I see somebody in a pts bed, I kick them out and state not to do it again. If they repeat the behavior I kick them out of the room. This is not a hotel (like so many people believe), the pt is there to get well not to cuddle or have sex in their hospital bed.
On the other hand, end of life and children are a totally different story.
I am totally shocked with all of your responses!!!!! When I see somebody in a pts bed, I kick them out and state not to do it again. If they repeat the behavior I kick them out of the room. This is not a hotel (like so many people believe), the pt is there to get well not to cuddle or have sex in their hospital bed.
On the other hand, end of life and children are a totally different story.
I'm with you, but my employer does not have a policy prohibiting visitors in the same bed as the patient. I would be sticking my neck out kicking a visitor out, without the guarantee management would back me up.
Honestly, there's only been 2 nurses I've met who have problems with this. They both were super conservative, had some control issues, very opinionated, and were very outspoken.
Opinionated nurses with control issues? Who ever heard of such a thing?
The only time I was shocked was when I found a married doctor in bed with his patient (who was his secretary, not his wife.) I just looked at both of them and turned around and walked out of the room. If the patient is comforted by their loved ones holding them, I am all for it. But I gotta be honest, when I am sick I don't even want touched, let alone someone in bed with me.
I just had a married couple the other day that would lay down together in bed. My pt was there for abx. They were a gay couple. The husband (not pt) helped with his care and did a lot to comfort my pt. (Very whiny pt)
It did not bother me a bit. They were great. If the hubby was not there he would have been a basket case, and would have made my job harder.
I deal with it case by case. Most times I let them know right off the limits. So far everyone has been respectful and helpful.
Specializes in Med-Surg and Ambulatory Care (multispecialty).
Don't get me wrong, I agree that a hospital is not a place to have sex, no matter who it is, private room or not. I just think if it makes someone feel better to snuggle a little with a loved one they should have that option. But safety first of course.:hug:
We allow it as long as patient isn't critical and it doesn't impede in their care. Not many actually climb in the bed but it happens from time to time. It isn't always couples either as we have parents, siblings, etc. cuddle and comfort patients at times. I have no issue with it.
I just had a married couple the other day that would lay down together in bed. My pt was there for abx. They were a gay couple. The husband (not pt) helped with his care and did a lot to comfort my pt. (Very whiny pt)
It did not bother me a bit. They were great. If the hubby was not there he would have been a basket case, and would have made my job harder.
I deal with it case by case. Most times I let them know right off the limits. So far everyone has been respectful and helpful.
I probably jinxed myself. Better prepare myself.
Agreed! Its case by case. I remember one patient and her spouse. She came in for a hysterectomy, was completely fine. He got into bed with her every now and then just to cuddle and hold her close. Four days after surgery, she coded and died. It was completely unexpected.
Now if he hadn't done that, the last time he would have held her would have been days before she died. My thinking is that at least he knew he was there with her as not only her spouse but as a comfort to her till the very end. At least he had those moments with her.
Specializes in Dialysis, Long-term care, Med-Surg.
I am totally shocked with all of your responses!!!!! When I see somebody in a pts bed, I kick them out and state not to do it again. If they repeat the behavior I kick them out of the room. This is not a hotel (like so many people believe), the pt is there to get well not to cuddle or have sex in their hospital bed.
On the other hand, end of life and children are a totally different story.
A patient has rights and are paying for services. If the patient says its ok for someone to lay in bed with them, have at it! If I or my family members were in the hospital, if anyone would talk to me in the manner stated above, I would send them out in tears and notify every administrator possible! We as nurses DO NOT have the right to repremand a patient as though they were a child! Just saying!
Specializes in Cardiac Telemetry, Emergency, SAFE.
Actually, having another person in the bed makes you liable for that person. They trip, fall out, hit their hands on the handrail, etc etc etc, the company and your licensor may be asking you why 2 people were in a sick bed built for one. Our policy is strict against it.
Getting into the bed does not automatically make you a patient, so how would the company/hospital be liable if they fell? Shouldnt this then also apply to anyone who even walks in the hospital and falls, trips or cuts their finger on a railing?
Ive had some people laying in bed together, kept a whiny/anxious patient from acting out, or comforted a sick person. Havent had the experience of people actually going at it, so once that happens we'll see if my opinion changes. (though i doubt it. )
)
BabyLady, BSN, RN
2,300 Posts
I disagree that they have the "right" to have sex in the room...there may not be a rule against it or against the law, but as a profession of mostly women, I find it very, very offensive that I have to worry about walking in on that.
In our NICU private rooms, parents are told it is not appropriate..the room is for the patient, not them.