I've have a weird week this week with some weird information that patients have said their doctors told them. It cracks me up because they either have the worst doctors I've ever known or they completely misunderstood what their doctor told them.
Example: Pt with a large abscess that's open and swelling. Abscesses don't usually swell more once open, so I was curious.
ME: How have you been treating it?
Pt: My doctor told me to clean with dawn dish soap and bleach. (He cut it open with a bleached knife and washed it with more bleach and dish soap)
What the doctor probably said: Clean with soap and water.
(Hey, bleach cleans stuff, right?)
another patient: Brought in five antibiotics from various dates some different kinds.
Me: Do you take all of these?
Pt: no, I just take them when I need them.
Me: Tell me what that means because that's actually dangerous.
Pt: Since I get lots of infections (from IV drugs) my doctor told me to take them whenever I feel an abscess coming on and stop as soon it goes away. (Queue my almost having an aneurysm.)
Me: Educated pt on the dangers and pointed out that each bottle says to make to take all medications and they would have received the same teaching from the pharmacy.
Pt: I don't think you're right. How do they even know how long to take an antibiotic? They're just guessing (I'm seeing stars in front of my eyes).
Me: tried to explain how they know how long to take antibiotics.
Pt: I think my doctor knows more than you since he's a DOCTOR and you're not, so I'll do what he says.
What the doctor probably: Do I even need to say it?
Please chime in with interesting "my doctor told me (input misinformation here)" I need a laugh before I go insane.