Marraige falling apart!! Trying to finish school and have a new son!

kastas, BSN, RN · Aug 18, 2005

I don't have much in way of advice for you. I know the stress. I worked full time and had a baby through school also. I can feel for you. I did have a very supportive husband, at that time. Maybe you just need to give him the ultimatum...buck up or get out. At least you could move on then. School may be harder w/o him around. But, there would be a little less stress. All I can say is Good Luck. I'll say a little prayer for you. Stay strong! Terri

brandyl123 · Aug 18, 2005

I have a 7 month old and 2 semesters left until I'm on the waiting list. I work full time plus do hair on the side and definetly have a lot on my plate. My husband and I are seeing a marraige counselor because he is a workaholic and doesn't know if he loves me anymore! I'm not going to say that I've been the perfect wife, because that would be a complete lie, but at least I've put effort into our marraige. The stress is getting to me! I want to finish school but don't know how well I'll do with all of this strain in my personal life. I wish my husband would either just decided to be a husband and father or leave so at least I can move on! I know what I have to do, I honestly just don't feel up to the challenge right now! Any words of advice on how to focus on school with so much else going on?

Hi Jen. I see your from Mi. Me too. I am finishing up my last class in a week and then my name goes on the waiting list, and I am so excited!!!, and you will be too. I understand a little on what your saying because relationships do make people stressed out sometimes. Don't be discouraged it will all work out. Don't think that you can not do it, you came this far. When my son's father and I split up I didn't think I could do it either. I have 2 boys they are 10 and 6, I work full time M-F and this past summer been going to school 3 nights a week and same for the fall. Sometimes I don't know how I came this far, but I have and you can too. I hope everything works out with you and your husband and that he becomes supportive of you. Good luck!!!

bmw804 · Aug 18, 2005

I have a 7 month old and 2 semesters left until I'm on the waiting list. I work full time plus do hair on the side and definetly have a lot on my plate. My husband and I are seeing a marraige counselor because he is a workaholic and doesn't know if he loves me anymore! I'm not going to say that I've been the perfect wife, because that would be a complete lie, but at least I've put effort into our marraige. The stress is getting to me! I want to finish school but don't know how well I'll do with all of this strain in my personal life. I wish my husband would either just decided to be a husband and father or leave so at least I can move on! I know what I have to do, I honestly just don't feel up to the challenge right now! Any words of advice on how to focus on school with so much else going on?

I am in a similar situation and it is hard. I haven't given him an ultimatum, but I would prefer if he made the decision, b/c I know if I do it there is not turning back or changing my mind. Anyway I am not thinking about it. I have a plan and I have to worry about finishing school and tending to my children. He can either either join us or watch my dust as I move up the ladder completing my goals. The last thing we need right now is to be stressed out. We will have enough stress with nursing school. Try to stay focused and pray as much as you can. Remember you are not alone.

suzy253, RN · Aug 18, 2005

I'm sorry Jen for all your troubles. I'm in a heck of an emotional state right now myself--not dissimilar to yours and I'm about to start my final year of nursing school of Tuesday. I've got to get and stay focused....then after this year I can do what I have to do.

RedSox33RN · Aug 18, 2005

I'm sorry to hear about this. I, too, am going through a divorce, have to move, have 4 kids, and am trying to finish nursing school. Some days I feel like packing it all in and going back to advertising/marketing, but I know this is my dream. Plus I can't make my kids happy unless *I* am happy.

You're doing the best you can, trying to make everything work. Many spouses don't realize how demanding nursing school is, and tend to get unsupportive. It's a shame.

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Aug 18, 2005

I wish my husband would either just decided to be a husband and father or leave so at least I can move on!

Why leave him with the decision? Look what it's doing to you in the process while you wait for him to make up his mind!

You have to live for yourself so you can live for your children. The current situation isn't helping anyone, something needs to change drastically one way or the other.

TweetiePieRN · Aug 18, 2005

I came across this thread and just want to say to ALL THE POSTERS...I will say a prayer for you all!! Life is stressful enough and you all are going through such difficult times. You all do sound like a bunch of tough troopers who can make it through the many challenges of life. Good luck to all of you.

To those of you thinking of putting school on the back burner! DONT! You will not be sorry in the end. In many areas, nursing pays well, has great benefits, flexible scheduling. DONT GIVE UP!! :) :) :)

qtcie · Aug 19, 2005

yup...you are right tweetiepieRN...it's all about not giving up. u'll get there...just be patient. courage is always the best thing to count on.

mdbarker · Aug 19, 2005

Hon, i'm so sorry for you, but I look at it this way you only live once and you need to be happy, u are the one that has to live your life and if he can't be happy and support you and be happy with you it's time to tell him to hit the happy trail, after all he married you for better and for worse. It will be his loss and your gain because YOU will be happy will your life and the life you will have made for your son. Best of luck to you and I will say a prayer for you.

fla orange · Aug 19, 2005

Hello Guys, Jen I was in the same situation that you're going through. I didn't let my husband decide what he wanted to do. I thought about what was best for me and my son. I told him to "Hit the road,Jack and don't 'cha come back no more". Life has been less stressful ever since. I concentrate on my kid, going to school and work. Nursing school offers enough heartache. Keep going to school, continue being a good mom and a good person and everything will work out for you. The best of luck to you.

nursefreak1 · Aug 19, 2005

I do not know a woman in nursing school who has not heard," all you're going to do is leave me for a doctor anyway..."

2 of my classmates are goingthrough divorce and my fiance' is this close to aasking for his ring back...not!

I am in my last semester of LPN school and will be startingthe RN program in January, if he leaves...

I will be upset, mad, distraught amd all else in between, but if I quit before I am a nurse I can't begin to explain how I would feel... :crying2:

It's hard but know you are not alone. My Gi-Gi( great grandma) said to me that if he leaves, that is what "devices" are for. You need stimulation go buy a rabbit :coollook: , need a hug call a good girlfriend , need romance a good movie or a great book.

Besides most of our partners are just a little insecure, male or female

You will be fine...try to stay focused and remember you can always get the rabbit :icon_hug: