Male Nurse and Sexual Comments

Virgo_RN, BSN, RN · Sep 9, 2008

I'm not an old fuddy duddy either, but I agree with you that these comments are completely inappropriate for the workplace, not to mention a bit on the creepy side to say the least. As a woman, if I knew a co-worker were making comments like that about me, I would be concerned about my personal safety and take precautions to never be alone with them.

Have you been direct with him and just told him flat out that you do not want to hear comments like that come out of his mouth?

Nurse Salt · Sep 9, 2008

Um, this could turn into a very scary situation very fast if you do not act now and is your friend aware of the weirdo's comments? If not, she needs to be so she is not taken off guard or does not enter into a potentially dabgerous situation with this creep... I had a subordinate make some pretty scary comments and leave a few creepy phone messages for me a number of years back. I didn't think much of it (was very young/naive) but under the urging of an older male co-worker I went to HR. Not three days later this creep was seen entering the managers offices. Later that night, I realized my car keys were missing from inside my purse which was in my desk and my car was moved from the bottom floor to the the top of the parking garage. My wallet was still in my purse but my checks with my address were gone along with my house keys. Luckily my old address was printed on the checks but I did notify the current residents being it was a local address. I just happened to be moving several days later and had already put notice in at that job because I was beginning nursing school, but I called in sick for several days after and stayed with a freind (I lived alone) because I was frightened for my own safety. My point is, I blew off this creep's advances as a harmless crush and he took it to the next level violating my privacy and personal space. Who knows what would have happened if he had my real address... Moral of my story: YOU NEED TO REPORT THIS A-HOLE! This warm body is not doing anyone any good and may potentially harm the warm body of your friend, do you want that hanging over your warm body? Keep us posted.

RNfaster · Sep 9, 2008

Doesn't your facility have a sexual harassment policy? I would report the issue to your supervisor, and if she doesn't handle it, report it to your compliance department.

I think the other posters are right that this guy may be someone to watch out for. He also might be young and stupid --thinking he's being cool for talking that way. (But I really am inclined to think he's more mentally off as his comments seem more extreme and derogatory.) Wonder if you might also remind him of the sexual harassment policy if you feel comfortable. --Even if you do feel okay in talking to him, I'd still report it and make sure your friend is aware that she's a target of his.

Thunderwolf, MSN, RN · Sep 9, 2008

Better to work short, than to work harassed.

The dude needs reported and written up.

If he does it again afterward, he needs fired.

If he harasses even after that, his board of nursing needs contacted.

locolorenzo22, BSN, RN · Sep 9, 2008

Tell him to stop.

Contact HR.

Work short, before working with a psycho.

Good luck.

clee1 · Sep 9, 2008

This needs to be nipped in the bud; one way or another.

One off-hand comment, even if inappropriate, is one thing: doing it repeatedly is indicative of a problem brewing.

Deal with it now.

Dottie78 · Sep 9, 2008

Has anyone ever told this guy to stop with the inappropriate comments? I'm also not an old fuddy-duddy, but that is crossing the line big time. I mean, this creep has the nerve to say something that crude in the workplace...he doesn't even have any class to think of something else to say other than that???

If he has already been told to stop and he's still continuing, go straight to the supervisor and take it up the chain of command, or even HR. I'd rather work short than have to work with some creep like him!

As for your friend, she needs to watch herself, and make sure she's never alone with this guy. You just never know now what people are capable of. Good luck and keep us posted!

mcknis · Sep 9, 2008

Def nip it in the bud now before it totally gets out of hand (sounds like it already has)! This could really turn bad very quickly and needs to be dealt with now before it gets worse. Involve the NM, HR, supervisors, CEO, etc... HE NEEDS FIRED!!!

Dolce, RN · Sep 9, 2008

I don't want to tell the nurse manager about it, mainly because he is a warm body, and we've had trouble keeping nurses (prison work). She is unlikely to do anything about it, and, if she did, it would be because her hand is being forced.
Any ideas on how to solve this?

You have to tell her about it. Think of how terrible you would feel if something happened to your friend and you hadn't done everything possible to prevent it. If your manager doesn't deal with this issue swiftly then she is a fool. Behavior like this is not to be tolerated!

OC_An Khe · Sep 9, 2008

This needs to be addressed quickly and the lady that is the target of this individual needs to be told.

The fact that this individual is a nurse is immaterial.

ChristineN, BSN, RN · Sep 9, 2008

Better to work short, than to work harassed.
.

I agree. When I was having issues with a man at my previous job, they would try to convince me to allow him to come to my floor (he was float pool) or else we would have to work short. My response, I'd rather work short than work with him!