Jump to content

Male nurse crying!!!

Men   (50,555 Views 172 Comments)
by ClassQ1 ClassQ1 (Member) Member

ClassQ1 has 1 years experience and specializes in ER/ICU.

1,278 Profile Views; 22 Posts

Hi guys,

As I was reading one of the posts about this nurse's first encounter of a patient demise and how she couldnt control her emotions and started crying, I became curious of the following:

1. How did you handle such a situation, demise of a patient you cared?

2. Did you cry? If you cried, did you go to a private place and cry while controlling yourself in front of others? If you did not cry, what was your feeling at that time?

While I usually do not cry, I believe I would cry if I am deeply affected emotionally but in a private place (I guess it is the male thing in me...lol)

Want to hear your thoughts/comments....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

teeituptom is a BSN, RN and specializes in ER, ICU, L&D, OR.

4,283 Posts; 14,050 Profile Views

I do not cry

maybe if they closed my favorite Golf Course

outside of that never

men dont cry

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Are you a credible source? Add your Credentials, Experience, etc.

109 Posts; 3,758 Profile Views

I disagree w/Tee's post..and actually think it's an utterly ridiculous statement. But, I think it IS agreed that everyone has an opinion (not to be confused w/fact or reality at times).....

I will be 35 y/o next month...and I just found something out about myself a couple years back....I never believed crying was ok (FOR ME)...I was NOT taught that or anything....it was just...in my blood, per se. My Mother was a nurse (40 yrs) and we never saught healthcare unless we were bleeding out the eyeballs (which I assure you was never, lol) ....there was just something in me that thought crying is weak. I had NO idea until a couple years back where it came from ....it came from MY MOM. Like I said -- I was NOT taught this...it's just the way SHE is...and the way I became....it was just an inherited belief I guess I'd call it. One day when I called my Mom SHE was crying and she sniffled it up (we grew up w/the "suck it up" mentality..then I went into the military and just advanced that, lol) and felt silly for having been crying....it was at that moment that I realized I just took after her.

Well -- I babble all that just to say ...just like everything else...it's individualized. It is ABsolutely ok to cry...it's what you feel comfortable doing, etc....People's opinions should be your last concern regarding this.

I took care of cancer patients for 3 yrs. Most rewarding experience of my life so far. Yes, I've cried. No, I've never ever been ashamed of doing so.

:)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

donsterRN has 10 years experience as a ASN, BSN and specializes in Cardiac Care.

2,558 Posts; 31,176 Profile Views

I do not cry

maybe if they closed my favorite Golf Course

outside of that never

men dont cry

Sure they do.

Maybe it's just you, and you're not really a man...

Or something.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

danissa has 12 years experience as a LPN, LVN and specializes in midwifery, NICU.

896 Posts; 11,069 Profile Views

I do not cry

maybe if they closed my favorite Golf Course

outside of that never

men dont cry[/quote

Well, tee..i'm married to a real man..have been with him for 23 yrs.........he has cried at the birth of our children, at the death of close ones,all the while being there for his wife and children, supporting , nurturing doing the Real man thing!!

No, he would not cry at the drop of a hat, movies do not move him as they do me, but with deeply personal stuff, yes REAL MEN CRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(oh also my daddy...anything hurting his kiddos, injustice to wee ones..he has tears of frustration....and he is whats termed a hard guy!)

get a heart tee!

And roy...that picture..heartwrenching!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Tweety has 28 years experience as a BSN, RN and specializes in Med-Surg, Trauma, Ortho, Neuro, Cardiac.

2 Followers; 28,921 Posts; 47,707 Profile Views

I've cant' say I've ever cried over a patient death. But I've gotten teary eyed in dealing with some of the familes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Are you a credible source? Add your Credentials, Experience, etc.

3 Followers; 36,831 Posts; 97,303 Profile Views

I'm female and could not physically bring myself to cry for around 20 years following the death of my spouse, due to PTSD resulting from how I was treated during this time. I can honestly say it was a pathological state for me. I do not know how many men can control their emotions that well. And I also can see how somebody in that pathological state could easily get violent or kill. Just speaking from my own experiences.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Are you a credible source? Add your Credentials, Experience, etc.

116 Posts; 3,336 Profile Views

Hell I teared up a little just reading Roy's link from his thank you card.

4 yrs Army, was a carpenter and machanic, 6'1" 220lbs--hunt, fish eer, eer eer

I tear up all the freaking time, Actually cry though...very rare...but it does happen.

Real men DO cry, just not very often.

Tom

P.S---I have been on here for awhile now and got to say, ROY- I love those Pics from Iron Madien, I saw Bruce Dickensen (on a solo tour) while in Germany. It was a little bar in Frankfort--wow that ROCKED.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Atl_John specializes in Pulmonology/Critical Care, Internal Med.

216 Posts; 3,744 Profile Views

We cry....I cried for the first time in clinical while doing Hospice. Seeing this woman who had just deteriorated so much that I think a holocaust victim had more muscle just made me loose it. I did it right in front of my clinical instructor, I didn't care it was sad so I let my thoughts be known.....just as I always do.

John

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Are you a credible source? Add your Credentials, Experience, etc.

63 Posts; 1,898 Profile Views

I have seen male nurses take a break after an emotional situation with a patient or their families. I attempt to give them a little time, in private to pull it back together, and then go on with whatever needs to be done. Crying is a personal thing, I can cry when laughing at certain situations, but deeper feeling associated with grief and loss are private to me.

Hey TOM;

You remind me of one of my favorite pets, all growl and brissle, but soft and tender underneath. Hope you have a good day on the links.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

PMFB-RN has 16 years experience as a BSN, RN and specializes in burn ICU, SICU, ER, Traum Rapid Response.

5,143 Posts; 69,122 Profile Views

1. How did you handle such a situation, demise of a patient you cared?

2. Did you cry? If you cried, did you go to a private place and cry while controlling yourself in front of others? If you did not cry, what was your feeling at that time?

While I usually do not cry, I believe I would cry if I am deeply affected emotionally but in a private place (I guess it is the male thing in me...lol)

Want to hear your thoughts/comments....

*** Sure I'v cried. I cried when my best friend was killed in combat. I cried when the best coon dog I ever owned was killed. Maybe a few other times.

I really can't imagine crying over the death of a patient and I work in a large ICU were patients die all the time. I had a week in April when one of my patients died every day. I don't get emotionally attached to my patients, but then I only work with adults. Tragic children's cases might be different

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×