It's not my job to pray with you.

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I am not religious. I do not pray. If praying makes you feel good then awesome. Do that. When patients are religious and need spirutual support, I am the first one to find their local pastor/rabbi/medicine man/etc. for them. This is how I can support my patient. I do not feel however, that I should be pressured to say prayers. yes, I will give my patient space and quiet time to pray if they want, but i don't feel it's my job to pray with patients. I feel this is over the line.

I am an atheist. In my career I have seen how much comfort people's religion brings them (or causes turmoil, depending on the situation). Working in trauma we often care for patients and their families facing huge, life changing situation in the middle of the night with no preparation. I have been asked to pray with my patients a number of times. My job is to bring them comfort. If praying makes them more comfortable then I have zero problem with it. I asked a wonderful catholic priest / hospital Chaplin to help me come up with a couple prayers that I have memorized.

Sure _I_ know we might as well be praying to Spiderman, but it's irrelevant. What matters is how it makes my patient feel.

Hey now, I'm Spidey's mom and he DOES exist! ;)

Being respectful and being part of the group when people pray or just the nurse standing by the patient while the patient prays is fine.

Being asked to pray when you are not a believer is hard and justifiably so. Some people should simply excuse themselves and find the chaplain or another staff member willing to do this.

I would never want to force someone into such an uncomfortable situation.

But some are perfectly fine with it.

As one poster mentioned, it is all about the patient.

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Specializes in Cardiology, Cardiothoracic Surgical.

Patients have asked me to pray with them a few times. I let them lead the prayer, stay quiet, and I can move on in my care faster. The patients are also far easier to care for.

No one I can remember, in recent memory, has asked me what religion I am, nor do I offer it (Buddhist). It's about the patient and their spiritual needs at the moment. They may be getting strength from you as the caregiver. If I can fulfill a patient's needs, I just go with it.

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Specializes in pediatric neurology and neurosurgery.

This is a really interesting thread for me, and timely as well.

Today I was with a patient and family during a crisis, and the family wanted me to pray with them. I have a relationship with this family and have known them a long time, so I already knew they are Catholic. I held hands with them and bowed my head, wondering what prayers they would choose. I'm Protestant, so it turned out that I didn't know their prayers, so I just respectfully listened and prayed silently in my head. I didn't mind, and honestly I was already praying in my mind anyway because of the situation.

But reading this thread has caused me to consider what I would do if asked to pray with a family of a completely different faith. I'm still sorting it out in my mind. I'm vacillating between "Oh, sure, I would just respectfully bow my head and pray silently as they did their own prayers", and "No, I would need to find the chaplain because he has rigorous training in ministering to people of many faiths". For example, someone upthread mentioned chanting. I wouldn't be comfortable with that.

So that leads me to the conclusion that yes, we do want to ensure that the patient's spiritual needs are met if possible, but that we could do that by seeking out someone else more appropriate (delegating, if you will). I think it's up to the individual nurse's comfort level.

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Specializes in Psych, Addictions, SOL (Student of Life).
Just to clarify they do not. Christians and Jews believe in the same God. Christians believe the messiah has come once and will return a second time. Jews believe the messiah has yet to come. Muslims believe in no messiah and that allah has never begotten a son. Given that the messiah is a pivotal part of jewish and Christian faith it is hard to say that they are the same as islam. As we give spiritually competent care it is important to know some differences in faiths.

You got me on that and I apologize for the misunderstanding. What I meant to say is that the big three religions all go back to the Father God Yaweh, Alla etc who forms the foundation of these faith traditions. They diverge over the issue of the messaih that's true but they all stem from the belief that there is but one true God and they were all born in the same part of the world.

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You can always offer a moment of silence, hold their hand, and/or stay with them while they pray. As a nurse, there really isn't much that is "not my job" job. Very often the buck stops with the nurse to make it happen. The chaplain could be unavailable or the patient could have a moment when he/she feels the need to pray. You certainly have your right to your own beliefs, however, a patient's wish to pray is more about his/her needs, not your aversion to prayer. In my opinion, you should be supportive and present without being untrue to your own beliefs.

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Thanks, that was bugging the crap out of me. I have worked in places with large Muslim populations and can't believe I forgot something that integral.

Imam?
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I agree with your stance. If I ever encounter a situation like that I'll send for the chaplain. Nobody's forcing religion on me.

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LOL! In my head I see you standing with a shield and a sword, repelling all comers. Or maybe beleaguered by hordes of people who are coming at you with Bibles/Torahs/Qurans/sacred scrolls.

**wiping tears of laughter**

Nobody's asking you to convert, calm down.

I agree with your stance. If I ever encounter a situation like that I'll send for the chaplain. Nobody's forcing religion on me.
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I am a religious person, and I would defer to the chaplain first and foremost. I pray in private, I'm all for silent praying w pt/family, but praying out loud with a pt at their request would only serve to make me uncomfortable.

By the way, what is considered the Bible Belt? I'm Canadian.

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Specializes in ICU, psych.

I would not participate in applying snake oil and I dont participate in a patients delusional behavior.

Unfortunately they have plenty of company in their delusion. Of course I dont confront them on this issue, I just ignore it. There has been a few times where I had to state that there was no god to get out of a situation.

At times patients credit god with the improvement of their health. When I hear this, I just ignore it. I had a 40 year old woman who had breast cancer. She went home to have faith healing. A couple months later she was back in the ICU to die. As I was caring for the tumors protruding from her chest, her sister was playing today's sermon. She even told me that I was the answer to her prayers. I asked how that was, and she said that she prayed that I would be her sisters nurse.

I know that a patients emotional health is just as important, and I act appropriately. I just wish our world would over this religion thing and realize the truth.

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Just to clarify they do not. Christians and Jews believe in the same God. Christians believe the messiah has come once and will return a second time. Jews believe the messiah has yet to come. Muslims believe in no messiah and that allah has never begotten a son. Given that the messiah is a pivotal part of jewish and Christian faith it is hard to say that they are the same as islam. As we give spiritually competent care it is important to know some differences in faiths.

Actually, the God of abraham is the same God of all three religions.

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By the way, what is considered the Bible Belt? I'm Canadian.

There are a bunch of states in the southern United States that have a deeply religious culture. There are more churches than bars.

USA+Bible+Belt+a.png

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