Is calling off for burnout a thing?

[Stella_Blue]

Okay so let me start out by saying when it comes to attendance I get an A+.  I never call off.  In 5 years I have called off maybe three of four times total.  I have been starting to experience burnout like I never have in my life.  I have been exhausted before, but this is on another level.  I cried at work yesterday, and I simply don't do that.  It took my patient almost coding before someone would come help me.  Unfortunately, I also let my vulnerability show at work, which again, I don't do.  Fast forward to today, I called off because I didn't sleep at all last night, I had a terrible migraine from all the stress at work yesterday, and yes I'm so burnt out that my mental health could not  take another day.  

So here is where my problem gets worse.  I caught wind from a friend at work that the charge nurse was telling my manager how incompetent I am at my job (which is not true guys) and how she had to do my job for me yesterday.  This is also not true.  I was left on my own yesterday in the fast track area of the ED with tanking patients all day, and my charge nurse did not come to help until my patient was unresponsive, and I broadcast overhead that I needed help.   When I was done helping that patient, I come back to my desk and she said I called the family for you.  I thanked her and mentioned I had to call another family member for another patient and she offered to call them, so I let her.  Today, she tells my manager that she had to do my job for me because I was too stressed.   I know she is just trying to cover her own butt for putting inappropriate patients in the fast track area, with one nurse, when I voiced my concern with how sick these patients were.    

Now, I'm just concerned with how I will be perceived by my peers, my manager, etc.  I feel like I should have just bit the bullet and went to work, migraine/bad mental health and all.  Today was supposed to help me reset, but now all I'm doing is stressing more. 

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

Time for a break sister.  I would go for a three day call off.. Apply for FMLA.

 Best wishes. 

[JKL33]

I would take a short break then refuse to put up with this B.S. When there is not enough help for seriously bad situations then I would never wait for any charge nurse. Start calling people. I know you have other things to do but this will go on and other people will make it look like a problem with you until you get determined to stop it.

I would ask for a meeting with your manager on the offensive. Plainly state that you were ignored and that it can't happen again. Don't mention the rumors you've heard since then and don't talk about your migraine or anything else. You need your business face and you need to put your foot down.

The ED grows more insane by the day, with innumerable resources being used on people who are simply not very sick while people flounder alone elsewhere and the patients whose problems can't be cared for anywhere else suffer, as do the nurses trying to care for them and do everything they need at once. Utter insanity. The entire setting has gone off the rails. Long before covid.

[Closed Account 12345]

Mental health matters, and a nurse who didn't sleep at all the night before a shift and has a splitting headache isn't going to be very effective or safe.  Don't feel bad for a minute!

As for the charge drama, your work performance speaks for itself. It doesn't take very long to realize which co-workers are strong and which ones struggle in nursing. If you're a great nurse, your manager and peers already know that! Don't worry about what one bad apple trying to cover herself says.

When you go back, I'd ask to meet with the manager to discuss safety concerns about inappropriate fast tracking. You don't need to name names, but you could say "Last shift, I had XYZ kind of patients in fast track. I paged for help and didn't get a response, and one of my patients was unconscious by the time another nurse was available to assist. I am concerned about the use of fast track for legitimately sick patients. Can we review how this area is being used?" That conversation kills two birds with one stone. 1) That really is a patient safety problem. 2) You're not incompetent. You were just thrown under a bus. (And the bonus 3- If the manager pulls up info from that shift to evaluate your complaint, she will see that the charge was piling sick patients up in fast track.)

 

[Lunah, MSN, RN]

Stella, I am so sorry you have had to deal with that. *hugs* Please take some time off for self-care. 

[Stella_Blue]

35 minutes ago, Closed Account 12345 said:

Mental health matters, and a nurse who didn't sleep at all the night before a shift and has a splitting headache isn't going to be very effective or safe.  Don't feel bad for a minute!

As for the charge drama, your work performance speaks for itself. It doesn't take very long to realize which co-workers are strong and which ones struggle in nursing. If you're a great nurse, your manager and peers already know that! Don't worry about what one bad apple trying to cover herself says.

When you go back, I'd ask to meet with the manager to discuss safety concerns about inappropriate fast tracking. You don't need to name names, but you could say "Last shift, I had XYZ kind of patients in fast track. I paged for help and didn't get a response, and one of my patients was unconscious by the time another nurse was available to assist. I am concerned about the use of fast track for legitimately sick patients. Can we review how this area is being used?" That conversation kills two birds with one stone. 1) That really is a patient safety problem. 2) You're not incompetent. You were just thrown under a bus. (And the bonus 3- If the manager pulls up info from that shift to evaluate your complaint, she will see that the charge was piling sick patients up in fast track.)

 

Thanks for the great advise.  I have already text my manager and told him we need to have a conversation tomorrow when I get back.  I a normally the person who stands on the sidelines and never says a peep.  I am also a very paranoid person and am unsure how my peers feel about me and how I perform my job.  I'm just now nervous that I'm looked at as incompetent, which I've felt this way many times before.  I mean no one has ever said anything, but its just always a feeling I have.  It  could just be my anxiety.  A few people I trust, that I've confided in, luckily have told me they feel confident when they are working with me, so there's that. 

[speedynurse, ADN, BSN, RN, EMT-P]

Wow - are we the same person or something hahaha!

But seriously.....this sounds like my spiral downhill when I knew I needed to seriously leave the ER. I didn't have one day like this, but multiple days like this. It was not because I was an incompetent nurse or uneducated - it was the opposite. I WAS competent, educated, and conscientious which was what forced to leave the ER after multiple incidents like this....the day that I had to start CPR on a patient by myself because there was no one in the nurses' station to help....the many days that I had patients decline and I was begging for help and charge nurses/ER docs/hospitalists would ignore my concerns....my inappropriate fast track patients that needed to be in monitored rooms....etc.

1. This is NOT you or your fault. This is a product of too many inappropriate situations you were put in.

2. Charge nurses very quickly forget what it is like to be a staff nurse. I believe servant leadership is a very real and appreciated concept, but unfortunately, rarely is it actually practiced by leadership. And it is so needed!

3. The ER can truly bring out the worst in a person. This is coming from a person who truly LOVED emergencies....who said she would never do anything but emergency nursing. However, I became frustrated, anxious, almost borderline mean from sheer exhaustion. It took an emotional/mental/physical toll on me. I hated who I became....but yet it happens to the kindest, most amazing nurses....I have seen this multiple times over the years in the ER.

4. No, it is not inappropriate at all to call out if you are physically sick. I know there were nurses and techs calling out that were physically sick from the stress....migraines, multiple viruses from the stress on the immune system, etc. Stress is a very real thing and does impact a person physically over time.

5. Yes, a sad unfortunate part of the constant stress is being thrown under the bus. I have worked in a couple ERs and this especially happened in one. Ironically, the very things people may "throw you under the bus for" are often things they are also guilty of....sometimes even more so. I think sometimes it's hard to see ourselves as we are or even want to admit and that's what often happens when people throw others under the bus....they want to point out all the supposed inadequacies in one person, but they won't recognize aspects they need to change. In addition, sometimes those supposed "inadequacies" or simply perceptions....nothing more.

6. I do recommend taking some time off or a step back. However, if that does not work, then please please start looking at other jobs. Trust me when I say there is so much else out there and so much BETTER than the ER! ERs are not getting any better.....only worse. I used to think my ER was superior....but no longer do I think that. I loved my team and loved my work....until one day all the multiple incidents just weighed on me and I made the jump. I am in pre-op/post-op now.....and love it. I would say it is less critical thinking, but I traded that for a very REWARDING job.....a job I love and look forward to and feel like myself again. I actually laugh and joke and am dependable again....I am actually recuperating emotionally/mentally/and even somewhat physically now that that huge weight is off of me. I miss maybe 1% of the ER.....but nothing else. The trade-off is so worth it and I truly love being a nurse again.....I feel genuine and actually reach other to help others again....whether it's coworkers or patients or friends or family. I really do encourage you to try something else....this is coming from someone who has been there done that and waiting way too long to switch specialties. There are nursing jobs that are SO MUCH BETTER. I wish you the best and you are always welcome to PM me if you want to know more about what a better side of nursing is!

 

[NRSKarenRN, BSN, RN]

ED work is so stressful these days,  Set down now to write an outline of topic issues to discuss  using neutral verbage; review again prior to meeting with manager.  Does your ED provide stress debriefing counselors--use them, otherwise, contact your facilites EAP program for assistance.

Wishing better days ahead.

[OUxPhys, BSN, RN]

As I see people call off for every other reason except for being sick yes, it is absolutely acceptable to call off if you are burned out or need a break. 

[Green Tea, RN]

I think I probably see calling off a bit different from you. I do not feel ashamed to call off if I am sick or cannot function at 100% due to mental health. I have seen coworkers who come to work sick or cannot function due to different reasons, cause mess, and expect other people to clean the mess by annoucing excuses. It makes me wonder why they do not simply call off. It does not matter what the excuses are because I perceive showing up at work when you are unable to work as lack of professionalism honestly. I don't see any problem in which you called off.

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

Because I'm blessed with good physical health, I would say that 80% of my call offs in my 29 years of nursing have been "mental health days" and it is a thing. I don't abuse it and only when I can't face another day,  self-care is a must.   I need that day to reset and regroup and be my best self.

It does sound like you have some work issues to address.  But first get some rest and take care of you.

[Swellz]

I call off for my mental health more often than I call off for my physical health.