I am not proud of my track record.

[ItsThatJenGirl, CNA]

So you're saying you never made mistakes at all as a nurse, hmm?

Which of these is a "mistake"?

Charting that you've completed procedures that you haven't isn't a mistake, it's a lie.

Charting that you're leaving later than you are isn't a mistake, it's also a lie (and stealing).

And finally, not going to a med error CEU to keep your job wasn't a mistake, it was a decision (a bad one).

Until you're able to see that it's your repeatedly poor choices that have put you into this position, rather than mistakes, misunderstandings or happenstance, you're going to continue to fail.

When you're the responsible for the lives of other people, you have to follow the rules. They are there for a reason.

[sevensonnets]

Nitpicking my words won't help your case, STARL. I've worked in cardiac intensive care/open heart for almost 37 years, so I'm obviously doing something right. You have been offered good advice from experienced nurses who have pointed out the obvious to you but you prefer to forge your own path. Good luck with that!

[Wuzzie]

I don't think you understood my comment. I know that fraud is WRONG. Did I know it was fraud at the time? not necessarily. I didn't think it was on the level that it was, such as involving insurance companies and everything else that goes into it. Now that I know what's all involve and seeing the big picture, will I do it again. "NO" I worked too hard to obtain my license and I am not going to lose so easily.

And there's the problem. You shouldn't not commit fraud because of how it could affect you. You shouldn't commit fraud because it's WRONG!!! Your thought processes are bordering on sociopathic. That being said I don't think you are a total lost cause given that you have at least a hint of willingness to do some introspection but the first thing you need to realize is there is no excuse whatsoever for all of the things you've done. None! Nada! You did some extremely bad things and I'm not overstating it. Not one of them was a mistake. Every single incident was a conscious decision on your part to do the wrong thing. You need to figure out what part of your personality allowed this to happen and fix it before you hurt someone.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

Which of these is a "mistake"?

Charting that you've completed procedures that you haven't isn't a mistake, it's a lie.

Charting that you're leaving later than you are isn't a mistake, it's also a lie (and stealing).

And finally, not going to a med error CEU to keep your job wasn't a mistake, it was a decision (a bad one).

Until you're able to see that it's your repeatedly poor choices that have put you into this position, rather than mistakes, misunderstandings or happenstance, you're going to continue to fail.

When you're the responsible for the lives of other people, you have to follow the rules. They are there for a reason.

Lying, stealing and repeated bad decisions make one a poor nurse. In fact, it could be argued that one shouldn't even BE a nurse if one has a habit of lying and stealing.

[STARL]

[/b]

And there's the problem. You shouldn't not commit fraud because of how it could affect you. You shouldn't commit fraud because it's WRONG!!! Your thought processes are bordering on sociopathic. That being said I don't think you are a total lost cause given that you have at least a hint of willingness to do some introspection but the first thing you need to realize is there is no excuse whatsoever for all of the things you've done. None! Nada! You did some extremely bad things and I'm not overstating it. Not one of them was a mistake. Every single incident was a conscious decision on your part to do the wrong thing. You need to figure out what part of your personality allowed this to happen and fix it before you hurt someone.

I am not saying what I have done was a mistake. I understand that what I did was wrong. This is why I created this thread hoping to get some advice to talk to someone about it because I was feeling so terrible. With that said, this was a wake up call. I'm going to try to better myself as a nurse. I don't want to be a "bad nurse" otherwise, I will just leave the profession altogether. I'm going to continue working with the patient that I'm working with now and hopefully obtain another case as I continue to support myself through school. In no way am I minimizing my actions, it was wrong. point.blank. period. I don't want to put others live in jeopardy nor do want to have such actions weighing heavy on my conscious. I'm going to wait on the BON response and hopefully move on from this.

[Horseshoe, BSN, RN]

Why the heck did you not do the med error CEU? That was a simple thing you were asked to do, an easy way to repair your working relationship, and you could have learned some valuable things on top of it.

If you weren't willing to do such a reasonable and simple thing, I really don't know what to tell you. It doesn't bode well for a good future for you in nursing.

[STARL]

Why the heck did you not do the med error CEU? That was a simple thing you were asked to do, an easy way to repair your working relationship, and you could have learned some valuable things on top of it.

If you weren't willing to do such a reasonable and simple thing, I really don't know what to tell you. It doesn't bode well for a good future for you in nursing.

I already planned on leaving the job.

[SunnyPupRN]

I'm not one to tell others what to do, but I think there's a part of you that is making the decision for you already. If things continue this way, you could be banned from participating with any program that participates in Medicare or Medicaid, and not just the patients, but the agency or hospital completely.

[SunnyPupRN]

The first time, within your first year, hedging your bets that BON doesnt know about what else you did. On one hand you say you understand the seriousness, and on the other, you minimize the consequences as if it will all somehow work out. If I'm honest, I'd say your words sound like those of an addict, repeating the same mistakes, taking great risks, minimizing the consequences, and repeatedly saying 'Next time I'll won't do this." I'm not saying you ARE an addict, I'm saying the thinking pattern is similar, and you are right...it's odd, and it would be a good thing to understand why this behaviour is occurring before you or someone in your care gets hurt. Consider booking a therapist, and getting to the bottom of why you are sabotaging yourself.

[purplegal]

Wow...and I thought I was having a bad first year as a nurse. I also left my first nursing job, but it was more so to do with the fact that I was not ready for the intensity that my first unit required, not because I was making med errors or falsifying records or even because I didn't like the unit. I understand about not loving your nursing job or not having one that's your first preference, because that's where I'm at. However, that is no excuse for purposely doing things incorrectly. Also, you need to find a way to make a job work for a decent amount of time. If you're doing well with an employer, try staying with them for a while, even if it means delaying your schooling. You need to start building up your resume as well.

As for your jobs:

1. At your first job, you should have asked for specific reasons as to why you were being let go. They should have been providing you with evaluation, but, since you were not hearing about it, you should have mentioned that you were not aware of any concerns. Although employers can fire you for no reason at all, generally there is a reason, and it's in your best interest to find out why.

2. When you are confused about a medication order, you need to ask questions and clarify it before you administer the medication. At my workplace, orders are often entered incorrectly, so I have to ask questions to make sure that what I'm about to do is correct. Also, they did give you a chance to still work with them, you simply had to complete a CEU. If you really want to be a nurse, I am wondering why you did not lack the motivation to complete that CEU.

3. As for not completing treatments at the nursing home, I don't believe that is the biggest issue. I also work at one and we are VERY busy and so sometimes things do not get done and we have to pass them on to the next shift. However, when this happens, you need to chart that it did not get done or if the patient refused, chart that. It's not the fact that you didn't get everything done that's the problem, it's that you charted that you did things when you did not.

4. At any job, there are skills you need to have. So, even though you weren't using ALL of your nursing skills, you were still using some of them. And since you were getting good reviews, this would have been a good job to have on your resume. I know that you were starting school, but maybe it would have been better to delay that in order to have something you would actually want to list on your resume.

5. If the parents were telling you that you could leave early and still chart leaving at the correct time, you should have politely refused, and then reported it to the agency. That way, it would have been on the parents, and not you.

I am sorry that you are struggling to get through your first year. I know first hand how difficult it can be to be let go from a job. I also know that it must be frightening to worry about the BON contacting you, although I don't have my own experience with that. I don't want to say you shouldn't be a nurse, because you very well could make a good one. However, you need to start looking at the reasons you haven't been successful so far. If you know something is unethical, don't do it. If you're leaving because you don't like every single aspect of your job, you'll probably never be satisfied. Find a job that you can establish a good reputation with and stay with them for awhile. If that means delaying your schooling, consider it. Do what you need to do to get back on track.

I'm truly sorry you're having bad experiences, and I hope I do not seem harsh in my post. Best of luck to you.

[Lev, MSN, RN, NP]

Maybe honesty is something you are lacking. Charting that you left on time when in reality you left early and charting that you gave that treatment when in reality you did not. Soon it will be the IV cardiac meds that you charted as given but then did not, and whoops patient is dead.

Look for some local ethics classes.....

[kbrn2002, ADN, RN]

It's not just the admission of so many things done wrong that is disturbing to me, it's the follow up responses that convey the attitude that you really don't think anything you did was too wrong...wrong yes, but not too wrong. Some things have no shades of gray and falsifying nursing documentation and time records are two of those things.

There is no justification that makes this OK, it's not only unprofessional and ethically wrong it is also illegal. If it's not reported by your employer they also would share any legal liability for the committed fraud and I doubt many employers are willing to risk losing medicare/medicaid certification to protect you. Nor should they be expected to, as it is they most likely have to wade through an incredible amount of documentation to just to protect themselves. Terminating your employment and reporting your actions to your states BON are logical steps they would take during the process of proving to the powers that be that the agency is not responsible for or condones your actions.

You need to take a moment and reflect on how serious what you have done really is. There might be possibly serious and maybe even career ending consequences. Then again you may get lucky and have rather minor consequences. I do sincerely hope it is the latter and you are able to recover your career and grow from this. Prepare for the worst, but hope for the best.