I feel like I'm being singled out VENT

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I am knee deep in nursing school currently working on assessments. The fall semester has just begun and I find myself being reprimanded by a professor and then counseled by the dean. Nice job…right?

I often tell my friends “I’m just happy to be here” and with good reason. I fought for my spot in nursing school….every step of the way and sometimes against the recommendations of counselors. I was determined to get in…my last move involved dropping into Med Mirco mid semester. I was told by my counselor that I would never make it…I was given the chance and was told “Catch up” and I did…I earned an “A”. I have pulled of 20 credit semesters without a hitch and this fall happens to be yet another 20 credit run.

“Over achiever” is something I hear often but the fact is I am not one…I work hard and even when I want to cry I stand up straight and bite my lip. Well apparently the faculty sees this behavior as being “Cocky, and arrogant.” I was told this by the dean…I am perceived as one who “speaks as if he knows more then he really does” and “thinks nursing school is easy”…this is not the opinion of the dean however. I have a 3.9 GPA, made dean scholar the past two semesters and also work at the hospital. “Easy” has never been considered when it comes to nursing school. To complete the picture I was elected class president and I am politically involved with nursing…

So what is this “over achiever” whining about? I have sensed “something” these past few semesters…tension, animosity…something just barley palpable. The nursing staff just seems to be dry, sarcastic and almost condescending toward me. I answer questions in class and I am ignored, professors are near explosive with me when I ask them questions…but something else…

I turn in an assignment that is found to be unacceptable, unprofessional…and it requires the attention of the dean. I wrote a pain assessment citing “no pain”. OK…so I will take that one, I am a student after all. But the other assessments are found to be just fine as per the dean of nursing…”I don’t see any problem with this”. However the instructor provided a laundry list of inequities. My instructions from the dean…”Grovel. Do what you have to do…” ??

Now all the past comes to mind…some time ago I was written up and sent home for coming to class with sandals on. It was supposed to be a class day that somehow turned into a lab day for which I was “unprepared”….”School Policy” I am told. Well school policy also states “No butts, no boobs and no backs” in class and yet all the busty girly girls are permitted to come to class in boob hangers and daisy duke shorts…the list goes on. The dean tells me “I’ve seen this before with other male students”

So for the first time in history I am thinking about quitting. I had no idea this would turn out this way…I thought college meant you work your butt off and earn the best grade you can. I’m at the top of my class and have earned the respect of my classmates and yet I feel as if I don’t belong. I have worked for many years in healthcare and my experience is not even considered a factor here let alone my grades. I’ve been reduced to…to feeling like everyone has been lying to me…like my work is unappreciated and that THIS is all a lie.

It seems these professors feel a student needs to nail themselves to a cross to appreciate how difficult nursing school is. Confidence is viewed as arrogance and success is viewed as an attempt to disrupt the system. I was told from the beginning “Nursing school will be the hardest thing you ever do”…to me it seems nursing school is a cake walk in comparison to the people running it and the politics associated with hazing.

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Specializes in Emergency Room.

It does sound like they have it in for you for some reason. DO NOT let them get to you! Keep working hard. You can't let small minded people affect your dream of being a nurse.

You can do this! You will be so proud of yourself in the end.

:grad:

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I hate to say this, because I know how frustrated you are today and I don't know anything else about your experiences in life, but it sounds like you're coming to the realization for the first time that life really ISN'T fair. And I mean ISN'T fair beyond what our parents meant by it. You sound the way I felt when I was a teenager competing in a world competition for music. For four years straight I was deemed the SECOND best player of my instrument in the world under the age of 18. It drove me crazy to work so hard for so long (since I was four) and to never be picked first. In the end I realized, it isn't only about my contribution, it's politics. The politics of life. And the politics are just as real as anything else, and few of us escape them. It sounds like you are a very dedicated, hardworking, successful student. The only way to view it is to be happy that you have realized this truth earlier rather than later in your career. From now maybe you will be more aware and savvy in you endeavor. Above everything else, DO NOT QUIT!

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Specializes in Peri-op/Sub-Acute ANP.

I am truly not saying this to be antagonistic, and I feel your current frustration. Clearly, you have worked hard, but don't develop a chip on your shoulder about it - it will be the only thing people will see about you.

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Hang in there my man. The medical director of the building I work in now ( a good Doc friend of mine) told me before day one of nursing school that I (as a male) should be ready for the Estrogen Bootcamp. Sounds like it may have landed on you. If you're in the right, you do whatever you damn well have to do to succeed and make it look good. One day when you're in charge of those shmucks it'll all have been worthwhile.

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Specializes in 5th Semester - Graduation Dec '09!.

It sounds like this whole thing will blow over-- things will work out fine. Just fall below the radar, pretty soon you will have a license and won't have to answer to anyone!

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Specializes in Telemetry.

Hang in there my dear. Please do not let these simple human beings crush your dream. Do not let them feel dignified by quitting, be strong. Brick walls are here to help us be strong and also to motivate us. You will make it by the help of God. Get down on your knees and pray, He will turn things around for you. I have been there, I know what i am taling about.

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Specializes in Ortho, Neuro, Detox, Tele.

Number 1...you fought for your spot, and got what YOU wanted...the chance to be in NS and determined to do this for you.

Number 2...Perception is a tough thing to overcome. Welcome to the world of estrogen. My first semester...I knew nothing, and I knew it. I was very silent, and kept to myself. by the end, I was seen as a possible contender for class president, but it came down to class size....Overall, I feel that if I have something to say, I'm going to say it...but tactfully. Perhaps the instructors feel that you have somehow overstepped your bounds as a student. Pull it back a little?

Welcome to the double standing of being a male. You have to do what it takes to get through...it may hurt, but you have to do it. GL to you and I hope things work out.

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Specializes in Corrections.

Whatever you do, DON'T QUIT!!! It sounds like they are nit picking with you...don't let them win.

Best of luck, and I hope things get better for you because you earned your spot there and it sounds like you deserve it!

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Specializes in Critical Care.

I am really sorry that others feel threatened by your intelligence and dedication. Some are not able to work as hard as you and they seem resentful. Don't let them get to you because it will give them pleasure. You sound like a really hardworking, committed and determined individual. Never let it go, you will always know that you are strong.

Women can be really hard to deal with because the emotional sense that we carry. You will have to learn to channel those direct emotional darts away from you personally and look at it in a different way. Life is not fair and it never will be but we have to learn to make what we have the best that we can.

Good Luck and congratulations for all of your accomplishments!

:cheers:

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Unfortunately, politics are a part of any organization. Colleges seem to be one of the worst places for it. You've worked very hard, and you don't have much time left. Can you tough it out until graduation? It sounds like they are threatened because you are doing so well. That is a very common human emotion. Keep on working hard, and do what you need to do. Do you have some activities outside school that help you de-stress and get your mind off of this?

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chill. it's not all about you. take your eyes off yourself. Dont burn out (which I suspect you have a history of)

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