How long should one grieve after losing job?

%D#2 · Jan 12, 2016

Sometimes low confidence and nerves can dictate our performance , this doesn't mean it won't work out elsewhere. Things happen for a reason sometimes. Maybe you're needed somewhere else and this door closed so another can open

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Jan 12, 2016

I don't know how long you will need to grieve. Do what seems right for you. Do what others have said - figure out why you were let go, what you should have done differently. Were there any interpersonal conflicts or was the issue that you were slow or too hesitant, too confident, too whatever, or not enough whatever?

There are other jobs, so start looking for them and considering applying. Take the old job if it feels right, but do keep hunting for a new Nursing job if that's what you want to do.

Best wishes and God bless you.

roser13, ASN, RN · Jan 12, 2016

It is hard to get over something that was basically your life for the past three months. I put a lot of hours and effort into something that just resulted in a failure. Maybe it is not a person or animal, but it was still significant, and something that I worked very hard for.

You are grieving something that made you miserable every single day (your own words). Think about that.

It is not healthy to invest this much of yourself in anything other than your family and your life outside of what you do for a living. I truly understand your devotion to your first nursing job but I think you need to revisit your priorities. Use of the word "grieve" does not belong in the business/career section of a person's life.

allnurses Guide · Jan 12, 2016

It is hard to get over something that was basically your life for the past three months. I put a lot of hours and effort into something that just resulted in a failure. Maybe it is not a person or animal, but it was still significant, and something that I worked very hard for.

I can't say hat I have ever grieved over job. Even one that I loved. It sounds like you were really trying to do well so IMHO what you should do instead of grieving is take a hard honest look at yourself and determine what you can do to correct performance deficits going forward. Then when you do get a new postion use this self reflection to excel.

I agree that working below your license would be a disappointment and only make you feel worse. Perhaps you would do better in med-surg to gain experience before tackling a specialty.

Peace and Namaste

Hppy

Libby1987 · Jan 12, 2016

A cardiac progressive care unit with both peds and adults for a new grad?

I'd say that it would take a lot of relevant experience, crazy level of maturity and steel nerves to succeed in that setting. I wouldn't have made it and I've had a good career..

It's not the job you're grieving, it's the fear amd sense of failure that you're trying to process. It's going to be hard but you've got to dig deep and not let an unsuccessful start, where you were essentially shooting for the moon, trip you up.

Take everything you did learn, look at it as a big fat gnarly scar of experience, refocus and dedicate yourself to finding a new learning experience.

Graduatenurse14 · Jan 12, 2016

The feeling of grief doesn't come from so much from what things are but what they were hoped to be.

Losing a job, failing a class, not getting the promotion are all things that can be and are often grieved- but in silence and in private since, as we can see from the majority of replies, our culture is very set on what is deemed grieveable and what is not. We would be a healthier society if we helped people with loss rather than minimize it and shame them for feeling badly about something "we" wouldn't feel loss over. To put it in nursing language "Pain is what the person says it is." That mantra we live by at work is a good one to take everywhere else too.

(((purplegal))) I am sorry that this has happened to you. I would feel a tremendous loss after all of the hard work and time that I put in then to have it not work out. The grief you feel is real and valid and will take some time to work through. That doesn't mean you obsess over the loss and what went wrong but as other have said take an honest inventory of what happened- perhaps writing things down as they come to you to be able to reflect upon them. I agree that one poor fit doesn't mean you aren't supposed to be a nurse in another area. I think you said that you aren't going to take your old job back so you will need to look for a new job sooner than later and still may be feeling not so great but as you receive encouragement from friends and family and even some on here, and start seeing what opportunities are out there, you will feel find where you belong. Good luck!!

PinayUSA · Jan 12, 2016

I know that's the nursing PC answer, and it's a good one. But the other response could be "seriously, get over it."
It's a job. No more meaningful than an object like a truck. It's not a child or a pet.
Get up tomorrow, forget the past and move on with the future.

So true

I look at work or jobs as stepping stones to move up in pay and knowledge.

It's just a job where you are working making money for someone else.......

iluvivt, BSN, RN · Jan 12, 2016

Get back on the horse ASAP.Look for another job as an RN at another facility. Pick an area that is not as intense to increase your chance of success. Be very honest with yourself with your weak points and make a plan to remedy those issues.

xoemmylouox, ASN, RN · Jan 12, 2016

Last Friday, I made the very difficult decision to leave an awesome nursing position--my first nursing position--as a cardiac progressive care nurse, to both adult and peds patients, and return to my former role as an ECG Technician, as placement office at my current employer was not willing to recommend me to another floor/unit. I have been devastated ever since. Family and friends have encouraged me to look for new positions, but I don't feel that I'm ready. I'm feeling so negative and depressed that I do not feel I could make a new position work at this point. Yet, I don't want to give up on using my license and nursing degree that I worked so hard for, forever. How long should I give myself to grieve before I need to move on?

Things happen. It is best to take some time to deal with this, but moving on is important. If you never try again you will never find the job that was meant for you. Stand up tall, brush your shoulders off, and put yourself out there - looking for the job that is right for you.

MrNurse(x2), ADN · Jan 12, 2016

Grieving is only natural. Take this time to self-assess. Write your strengths and weaknesses, ask your former coworkers for feedback, if possible. Gather as much info as you can to formulate a return plan. Do you have any experienced nurse friends? Maybe they could guide a speciality to pursue. Good luck in your endeavors.

purplegal · Jan 12, 2016

Even the littlest things set me off. I saw that I was removed from their email list, and I have spent who knows how long screaming.

I can't take this anymore.

THELIVINGWORST, ASN, RN · Jan 12, 2016

Even the littlest things set me off. I saw that I was removed from their email list, and I have spent who knows how long screaming.
I can't take this anymore.

You should probably seek some counseling if you honestly have been screaming because you were removed from a mailing list.