STUPID PARENTS!! (vent here) - page 3
This may not belong in this forum but it will have nursing issues involved. On October 30th my 9yo child was ran down by another child on his mountain bike. I say ran down because this is what he... Read More
Dec 19, '06Joined: Jun '05; Posts: 509; Likes: 84Do you have homeowners insurance? I know if someone fell in my yard, my homeowners insurance would pick up the bill. It's worth a try.
I hope your daughter recovers fast. I'll keep her in my prayers.
Dec 19, '06Occupation: LPN Specialty: A myriad of specialties ; From: US ; Joined: Feb '04; Posts: 1,052; Likes: 665Quote from RGN1This is a good idea, RGN. Another idea: how about a letter to the editor of your local newspaper detailing the situation? It might be nice to include the names of the guilty though I wonder if the newspaper would print it with the guilty persons' names....maybe word it like" Mr. X (just the X not his real name--but say"you know who you are" has a son named xx and here's what xx did to my daughter....") and don't forget to include info about the current law limiting damages to $1000. It just might appeal to some readers' hearts and pocketbooks; and if nothing comes of it at least you've vented publicly and alerted others to the effects of that strange law!What about the local press? Might not exactly get your money back but maybe richer readers will feel sorry enough to at least help pay the bills?? I know it sounds crass but it usually works here in the UK!
My heartfelt wishes go to the OP and his daughter.
Dec 19, '06Occupation: utilization review Specialty: 38 year(s) of experience in Case Management working from home ; From: PA, US ; Joined: Jun '05; Posts: 778; Likes: 239I think you should persue it in court. You would be teaching your daughter the right way to resolve a situation when she is wronged, you would be teaching this kid what the parents are not-that when you do bad things there will be consequences, and it will teach the parents that they cannot bury their heads in the sand about the future convict the are raising. Perhaps your lawyer friend can do the lawyer part pro bono so you will not be out much. $1000 is better than nothing, and look at all the lessons that will be learned!
Dec 19, '06Occupation: RN & Critter Mama From: US ; Joined: Feb '04; Posts: 4,977; Likes: 20,736I'm going to chime in on the "let it go" train of thought. Take comfort in the fact that your daughter "only" had a broken arm. The little juvenile delinquent could have done much worse. And chances are, he's going to blow something up very soon and his parents will be paying for that (since it will be property damage after all, stupid laws.)
I'm also curious, have you looked into your homeowners insurance to help with the bills? I'm sure that you've got a high deductible (don't we all!!!) but the bills for an orthopedist have got to be higher than even a giant deductible!
Dec 19, '06Occupation: Re-retired Specialty: 42 year(s) of experience in NICU, Infection Control ; From: CA, US ; Joined: Dec '00; Posts: 12,426; Likes: 3,783You might check the local criminal laws--in some areas, the parent can be arrested for the child's misdeeds--I'd certainly count assault and battery as a misdeed! I've seen parents have to come and clean up grafitti.
If the parents are so unaware of their child's activities that he causes severe harm to another child, should social services be involved? Seems like neglect to me.
Bottom line, don't do anything you'll regret later! I'm really sorry your family has had to go through all this. Very sad.
Dec 19, '06Joined: Aug '04; Posts: 9,279; Likes: 4,304I only think you should take it to court because, gads, what's going to happen when that little terror gets behind the wheel of a car?
He needs to learn that there are consequences for his actions.
Dec 19, '06Occupation: Operating Room Nurse Specialty: 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER ; From: US ; Joined: Jun '03; Posts: 17,036; Likes: 1,009I don't agree with the "let it go" side. The kid needs held accountable for his actions, and his parents need held accountable for their LACK of action.
Had it been my kid who did this to someone, first off the bike would be off-limits for quite awhile. Next, although it doesn't make up for anything, an apology to the child and the child's parents would be made. Next, i would offer to pay or help pay the medical bills for the immediate, BUT my kid would be working the bill off around the house, and the child's house, and helping the other child out, since that child only has one good arm for now, i bet they would need help with carrying books to and from school, etc.
And last but not least, a bicycle safety class, and afterwards, a verbal or written report of what he learned there.
Dec 19, '06Joined: Sep '05; Posts: 7,767; Likes: 1,230I would still go after the $1000. And go to the local press. Television- our local station has people who go after those who aren't held accountable and they have alot of success. Contact legislature about the law and write them an explicit letter detailing everything this kid did. Pictures are always good. Odds are he's not going to stop at your daughter. I bet he's a nuisance in school also.
And keep bugging the police. Did you talk to the chief of police? The mayor? He certainly wouldn't want it out that some kiddie hoodlum is out on the streets of his sweet little town.
Dec 19, '06Joined: Apr '03; Posts: 7,569; Likes: 2,297Quote from jimthorpI'd teach my daughter the anatomy of the patella and how to swing a nice piece of hickory with accuracy and power...
Oooooooo....I like that one......"I didn't see him standing there, honest!"
Dec 19, '06Specialty: NICU- now learning OR! ; Joined: Dec '03; Posts: 275; Likes: 16Wow. Where to begin......
I am very sorry to hear of this very painful situation for you and your daughter. I can't imagine how difficult this must be.
Now, with that said...I am SHOCKED by the posts in this thread! We are talking about CHILDREN here! YES, this boy was very, very much in the wrong...but I can remember plenty of times as a child doing bad things and making the wrong choices....but for goodness sake you can't fault a CHILD! The parents should have said "I'm sorry" or SOMETHING...but they didn't and that too is a shame...perhaps one of the reasons the boy acted the way he did (He was never taught any better)
I am personally disgusted by all the "sue happy" people in this world (as evidenced by this thread as well!) It is not the other families fault that you do not have insurance - plain and simple. We, as nurses complain about how people are so quick to sue...and just look at all the posts about limits on expenses being reimbursed...should this other family go bankrupt because of a CHILDS poor judgement??
Again, your situation is terrible and I am truly sorry for this-but all of this anger and talk of going to the media and the courts, etc. is not going to make your daughter better any faster. Children do silly/stupid/mean sometimes awful things...but there is VERY MUCH a difference between a 9 year old and a 19 year old and I think you know that. Sure, arresting this little boy would scare the heck out of him and make you feel better...but it isn't going to HELP anyone!
Just my .02
Dec 19, '06Occupation: RN Specialty: ER ; Joined: Aug '06; Posts: 515; Likes: 352Were your daughter's civil rights violated? Gender bias? That's a federal offense and outside the constraints of your state laws.
Dec 19, '06Occupation: RN Specialty: ER ; Joined: Aug '06; Posts: 515; Likes: 352A 9 year old knows right from wrong. This was not an accident caused by childish play. This was an intentional violent act of aggression intended to cause physical harm. It succeeded. To chide the OP for not having insurance is callous. Even if he did have insurance, neither he nor his insurance carrier should be penalized by having to pay for this criminal act.
Dec 19, '06Occupation: ER RN Joined: Aug '01; Posts: 5,322; Likes: 1,329Nine year olds are quite capable of knowing right from wrong. And they and their parents are old enough to understand that when you do something bad to someone else there will be consequences.
In this case the parents of the boy with the bike don't seem inclined to understand that there are consequences. So yes, the family of the girl should sue the family for the $1000 to help alleviate the costs incurred by their own child's poor behavior.
The boy wasn't just "being mean." He performed an act that caused harm to the girl that may continue for some time since her growth plate was so damaged. Not to mention that this family has to travel so far to get proper care for their daughter.
There's nothing wrong with seeking legal recourse due to damages caused by someone. If nothing else, there may be matters uncovered that require some social work intervention in that family.
I would also suggest going to the media and take this opportunity to work on changing laws.
If a child's family can be held responsible for damage to material property, then surely human life and welfare should be held at least as important.