Getting involved with a co-worker

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Mar 7, 2008

I have had a couple of lighthearted workplace romances, but these occurred several years ago during my previous career as a factory worker. My suggestion is to not do it, because life at work can potentially turn into a living hell if the relationship sours. In addition, workplace relationships will be successful only if both parties agree to leave the kissing, cuddling, and pillow talk at home. This woman, however, seems to want to get close to you at work while in empty rooms. Not good IMHO.

Good luck with whatever decision you make.

meandragonbrett · Mar 7, 2008

I vote for no. I've seen too many people get involved and it DOES affect your work when things go bad/wrong.

elkpark · Mar 7, 2008

Advice? Yes -- don't do it.

EmmaG, RN · Mar 7, 2008

Anyone have any experiences or advise you can offer me? I have been a nurse for almost 10 years now and i have managed to keep it business only until now. A month ago my unit hired a new beautiful, funny, smart nurse that comes on to me daily. She always ask me to hook up with her off duty.
She has even tried to kiss me in empty rooms. Something that would get me as a man fired but thats another story. The temptation to get involve with her is overwhelming. I have seen too many of these go very bad to say the list. I want to avoid this at all cost!!

If that's how you feel, and you've made it clear to her you're not interested, then what you describe is sexual harassment. It works both ways, ya know.

Ms Kylee · Mar 7, 2008

You have empty rooms? Geez, can you send me some? We've been full since before Christmas.

As for what do to... you know the answer....

widi96 · Mar 7, 2008

If she is that new, maybe she would be interested in transferring to another floor, in which case it might be okay. If you are both working on the same unit though and she is already trying to get you to do things that would get you both fired, its not going to get any better.

glasgow3 · Mar 7, 2008

Is your hospital a member of a system with other local hospitals? At the very least could you transfer to another unit within your current hospital?

Trust me on this one: Do NOT attempt to date this woman and to remain working together. Some folks are quite capable of doing so, but I don't see that as happening with you two. Please don't regard that as a criticism, a judgement upon your maturity etc......but I'm speaking from experience here.

You know darn well you are going to give in to this woman. And since you are AND you said you want to avoid a bad situation "at all costs"-----get out now!!!!

Sad to say, don't be too shocked if she backs off once you are no longer forbidden fruit; but at least you'll still have your job and professional reputation. lolol And probably a little fun in the meantime.

jessiern, BSN, RN · Mar 7, 2008

Sounds like she is just intereseted in one thing, and I think that could make for an uncomfortable work environment. Sounds like you would be in a good position to report her for sexual harassment. That is not appropiate actions at work.

And that is coming from someone that married a co-worker--but neither of us ever acted that why to each other. We keep it professional at work, and started seeing each other as friends.

allnurses Guide · Mar 7, 2008

I have to be honest although I know it's not a good idea I have had a thing with a co-worker, he was gorgeous and we hit it off, I was not long qualified so still fairly young and care free. It wasn't anything serious and we both knew that.

It was good fun whilst it lasted and we are still friends.

He was cute and thinking back still makes me a bit weak at the knees.

Just be careful and sensible

traumahawk99 · Mar 7, 2008

oh brother. if you like it, go for it.

i wouldn't do anything at work. if she wants to see you after work, then by all means...

too much analysis = you might die from boredom.

AmericanRN · Mar 7, 2008

Anyone have any experiences or advise you can offer me? I have been a nurse for almost 10 years now and i have managed to keep it business only until now. A month ago my unit hired a new beautiful, funny, smart nurse that comes on to me daily. She always ask me to hook up with her off duty.
She has even tried to kiss me in empty rooms. Something that would get me as a man fired but thats another story. The temptation to get involve with her is overwhelming. I have seen too many of these go very bad to say the list. I want to avoid this at all cost!!

Your post creeps me out and I'm a woman. I have no problem with people dating their co-workers if that is what each party desires and it doesn't interfere with their jobs.

That being said it seems like you are being set up to me with the empty room thing, and she's new. No one knows anything about her and what her past might be like and who jumps from lets hang out after work to trying to kiss you an isolated area?

If she wants to hook up with you off duty then she won't mind going with you and about 10 other coworkers and make sure there's a lot of women in that group too. In fact if you all go make sure you have the devil's advocate in the group as well, people with that trait see things alot more clearly then people who are easily fooled by niceties, prettiness, and things like that.