Experiencing racism and xenophobia when coming to CA to help with Covid

[xwill327]

As a travel nurse, I expect to experience whatever is thrown at me. What I experienced at Metropolitan State Hospital was beyond my expectations. It was an unbelievable encounter with rudeness, hate, racism, and xenophobia. 

On the first day at the facility, the staff was extremely rude to all of us who picked up to come work and help with COVID. All my travel colleagues would agree and could speak to the disrespect given to us. I thought this may not be a place for me to work and almost quit. Wanting to stay in SoCal I continued the contract. 

The extreme hate began on the inpatient unit. A psych tech and I were having a talk about life. I mentioned my “gay culture” to him and he replied, “what is gay culture.” In an aggressive manner. I saw his body language change, eye contact decrease and his fists even ball up. When I explained gay culture is my lifestyle he harshly stated, “That doesn’t exist. All gay people should come to Nigeria and be killed.” I replied stating that would never happen to me and I would protect myself in any way I needed. But I was fearful and shocked that someone could say that. I never reported this but spoke to a friend about what I could do to protect gay patients in hospitals, especially a state-run facility. 

The next situation happened more recently causing me to resign. The snowball effect of hate forced me to never return. A person who came over risking my own health to care for COVID patients had to run far away. I also signed a lease in Long Beach so could not even return home after such a horrific experience. 

So it started on another unit where I was talking shop with this shift lead on unit 409. We were talking shop and election results. The shift lead name Dia stated, “ I support Donald Trump because he is crazy like our patients so we should take care of him like we do our patients.” Her using the word crazy to describe a person with mental illness was alarming in itself. When you hear what happened next, that doesn’t even compare. I am someone who is asked every day, “Are you Arabic or Muslim? Are you from the Middle East?”, she intensely and rudely stated to me, “All Muslims should go back to where they came from!”

I was beside myself and had to leave the office and go to another unit. I absolutely told her she was xenophobic and doesn’t take care of “crazy” people because she hasn’t moved from the desk. I reported it to the manager right away and said I can not work there. They moved me to another unit. I am unsure if any action was taken, but I highly doubt it. The manager did not take any of my information. I quit and no one from the facility had reached out to me (5 days after I am writing this). 

I believe some form of justice should be served. Staff has said this is the culture of Metro and they are not surprised. Taxpayer money of gay and Muslim civilians alike find this facility and pay the salary of those who hate them and verbally express it freely. I fear for the patients who fit the criteria of what some of these staff members see less than and believe should be dead or deported. 

Please respond with helpful advice? How should I move forward to get justice?

[0.9%NormalSarah, BSN, RN]

I saw a couple recent replies that mention advocating for our LGBTQ+ patients, and I do think this is a good point. In nursing we must advocate for everyone, even if we personally don’t share their those characteristics with them. I’m just saying that professional interactions between people should remain very neutral in order to promote true acceptance. I never said a person should stay closeted until they know their coworkers. I said that talks about personal business of ANY kind should remain highly organic and relevant, and diving into a conversation all about gay culture upon first working with someone is just not likely to get the OP a desirable reaction. As mentioned before, and as more brilliantly said by @Wuzzie I just think we could be missing something in this thread about the nature of the interaction and what was truly said. No one here has said the coworker’s remark was acceptable. It’s just that we’re being told point A in the conversation led to point B, and I’m saying there is something in between that I think likely had to do with OP’s behavior or attitude. 

[NurseBlaq]

7 hours ago, juan de la cruz said:

 

Is that what the OP did?

Again, I'm going by OP's posting, I don't know him/her personally and no one else on this thread does either. That's how the message is received and obviously not just by myself. Like 0.9%NormalSarah said, there is more to the story and OP seems to be itching for conflict. Even throughout this thread, that appears to be the case regardless of sexual orientation. I too have seen this type of attitude. The fact is you simply can NOT force people to accept you or anything personally important to you no matter whom/what they may be. That's simply life. Not all of us agree on everything but we also don't disagree on everything as well. It is possible to disagree and agree with people and still remain civilized, that's how adults and professionals get through life daily. What was said to OP was trifling, no one is disputing that, it's OP's behavior, as evidenced throughout this thread, that is the part people are trying to understand. Was OP this standoffish at the place of employment to everyone, or just that person?

[egg122 NP, MSN, APRN]

I find it somewhat ironic that the OP is calling female posters on this forum, "hun", which is inherently sexist.

OP, since you are reporting employment discrimination and harrassment and you seek to be a change agent, you may find it more productive to file a complaint with the appropriate state agency or the EOCC rather than arguing with random folks on this forum.

But feel free to flame away at this post...

[Guest856929]

30 minutes ago, egg122 NP said:

I find it somewhat ironic that the OP is calling female posters on this forum, "hun", which is inherently sexist.

OP, since you are reporting employment discrimination and harrassment and you seek to be a change agent, you may find it more productive to file a complaint with the appropriate state agency or the EOCC rather than arguing with random folks on this forum.

But feel free to flame away at this post...

As a guy, I would be offended if another man called me “hun”, but I would be reluctant to express my outrage because someone with the sanctimonious disposition of OP might regard my repulsion as homophobic. 

[garciadiego]

Well part of the problem is the content of your conversations, sexual orientation, religion, politics.

[DeeAngel]

There is no reason to discuss lifestyle, sexuality or anything else at a new temporary job.  Learn to keep your mouth closed about personal life while at work.

[pmath_RRT]

18 hours ago, xwill327 said:

As expressed previously: I am not here to be polite. So your comment is not needed. Stick to the facts! No shoulda coulda woulda!

Let's say you were in mgmt and what happened to you was brought to your attention.  What would you do to handle this situation?

[Tammy Purdie, BSN, MSN]

First of all, you do not discuss your sexual preferences at work, that is giving out too much information and your sexual preferences should be kept private. No one needs to know what you do behind closed doors. I am sorry you went through my that but you kind of set yourself up for that. Some things are best left unsaid.

[spotangel, DNP, RN, NP]

Having worked as the Assistant Director of Nursing of a hospital and as evening manager of an ED in New York, If this situation was brought to my attention, both parties would be interviewed initially and requested to give a documented statement of what happened. If witnesses were present they would be interviewed separately and requested to give a statement. This would then go to Human Resource and Compliance  Department for further investigation and resolution. Cameras would be looked at if available. If the staff have union representation,all conversations would be in their presence.

Having said that, the expectation is that all staff are professional and  discrimination  and abuse will not be tolerated and the policy allows for suspension of both parties if warranted  till investigation is completed. We all have our views, beliefs and opinions which can be shared in a professional manner. If the conversation is unravelling, refuse to engage, be polite, walk away and report it.

I had a situation in the ED where I suspended two staff on the spot for a day and send them home for yelling at each other in a packed ED. They were asked to come in with their delegates the next day and they both got a written warning for aggression and unprofessionalism! Never had a problem with them again!  It also sent a strong message to the team that unprofessionalism would not be tolerated.

OP! Best of luck in your quest for justice! Not everyone is welcoming and sometimes it is wise to choose your battles especially if the culture of a place is not welcoming. Find a place of work where you can be accepted as a nurse and your personal life not fodder for others. It is wise to learn the culture of a place and not set yourself up for attack! It may take a lifetime,/ or never  for some to get comfortable with your lifestyle choices, We have gay, straight and transgender coworkers and don't always understand each others lifestyles but are respectful as coworkers. Cheers!

 

[xwill327, ASN, BSN, RN]

1 hour ago, Tammy Purdie said:

First of all, you do not discuss your sexual preferences at work, that is giving out too much information and your sexual preferences should be kept private. No one needs to know what you do behind closed doors. I am sorry you went through my that but you kind of set yourself up for that. Some things are best left unsaid.

Second of all, wrong! ?

[Tacocat, ADN, RN]

@xwill327 Why are you only answering posts that disagree with you, and not the posts trying to have an actual discussion? People have asked what you mean by justice, or how you would have wanted the situation handled. Why are those not valid questions?

[Hoosier_RN, MSN]

16 hours ago, DeeAngel said:

There is no reason to discuss lifestyle, sexuality or anything else at a new temporary job.  Learn to keep your mouth closed about personal life while at work.

I've been at my workplace for 3 years, and most don't know anything beyond me being married-I'm the manager. 1 nurse walked up to me the other day and ask if 'x' was my son. It seems that her husband grew up in our small town and thought he recognized me when he dropped off her lunch (I didn't recognize him, but now remember last name when thinking back). I've learned to separate work from personal, as many will often use any morsel of info against you if they can figure out how to twist it. Also, separating creates less headaches and promotes growth from other interests