Had a kid bring his wet, bloody tooth and plop it right on my desk.
C'mon now!
Or the kid that did running knee slide into my office.
C'mon now!
The ones old enough to cover their mouths but choose to cough right in your face instead.
All together: C'mon now!!
Some things just make me shake my head.
Female Student: *hunched over in pain* "I need pain meds"
Me: *slightly taken back* "Sorry kiddo, we don't do that here. What's going on?
FS: "I have really really bad cramps" *literally shivers from pain*
Me: "oh no, that sounds uncomfortable. I can't give you any medicine for the cramps but I can give you a heating pad and let you call home"
FS: *shivers again from pain* "umm. ok I guess I'll take the heating pad."
Me: "and you don't want to call home?"
FS: "No." *leaves office*
****student comes back 30 minutes later****
FS: *shudders from pain* "Here's your heating pad back. My teacher suggested I call home. Can I borrow the phone?"
Me: "Well, that sounds like a good idea Mr. ****** had. The phone is over there...don't forget to dial 9 to get out...."
Me. A, FEMALE NURSE, suggests calling home for some clearly severe cramps and you say no. But your MALE TEACHER suggests it and its be the best idea you've heard all day. C'MON NOW!!!!
My favorite subject...waaaaaait for it
H.S. student: (comes in office, looking/acting/walking half-dead.) Tells me how bad head/sinuses feel...goes...on...and...on...and
Me: Sorry bud, I don't have any medicine here for you (we don't stock medicine, it must be sent from home)
H.S. student:
Me: Sorry, none has been sent from home.
H.S. student: Well, do you have any "OILS" that you can give me to use?
Me: Ummmm No. We can't use them at school because they aren't FDA approved.
H.S student: WELLLLL, THE OILS THAT WE USE ARE 100% THERAPEUTIC GRADE !!
Me:
(back to class)
C'MON NOW!!!!!!!!!!
Happy Happy Wednesday everyone!!
240 pm (School Lets out at 325)-
Little Darling: I need to talk to you.
Me: Come on in.
Little Darling: (shuts the door before talking, so it can be a private chat) I need some new pants.
ME: Why?
Little Darling: These are to tight and are cutting into me. It's been doing it all day.
ME: Well, I have something to fix that. (I get a rubber band and show how to fix it)
Little Darling walks away disappointed because I did not call Grandmother.
C'mon Now!
dakotadenise said:Just had a kid bring in some OTC liquid allergy medication. Had all the paperwork filled out, so I was pretty happy. Until I checked the bottle out. Expired in 9/2010!
I'm sorry I cannot give a medication that has been expired longer than my kindergarten students have been alive, it's school policy
MHDNURSE
701 Posts
I just dismissed a girl in K with a textbook scarletiniform rash on her face and upper body, fever, sore throat. Told dad when he arrived that he needed to take her to the doctor to have a throat swab and be sure to bring a note to return to school so we know she has been treated if +strep. Dad proceeds to lecture me, telling me "strep throat is an internal infection of the body and does not cause a rash. This is clearly caused by something she ate or drank, like the water you give them here at school". Um, ok Dr. Butthole