Certainly, I'm quit sure I'm not the only nurse that has noticed this, let me explain what leaves me baffled with couples. For example, let's say a couple comes in seeking medical assistance. However, during triage the male,can't answer any questions asked by the nurse, even though there's no medical problem with his speech. Moreover, he has to look at his partner or wife to verify every single questioned asked. In addition, when asked what medication are you taking? once again they can't answer, and if the partner forgets their medication, they get upset with them. In addition, this is the time I take to educate the pt. and tell them that it's not your partner's duty, is your responsibility to know this information. Having said that, don't get me wrong, I understand if the pt. is in severe pain, and they can't answer these questions. However, the patients whom I'm referring to, are alert and able to answer. Therefore, I wonder what these people do when their other half is not present? This leaves me BAFFLED... I'm quite sure you have your own "Baffled moments with patients" I'm interested in hearing a few as well~
Wow Caregiver1977, I don't think I could put up with a husband like that! Having to prompt him like a teenager just to get him to go to work in the morning? Even when he's out of state? Wow.
Not here. As I said, this phenonmenon is learned, chosen behavior on the part of two adults.
And to be fair, there is the opposite sex counterpart, who is generally too tearful to explain s/s, history, etc. ... and so her male SO must do it for her.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
when dad was still alive, he'd bring mother to all his appointments with him, and even though he knew she had alzheimer's and couldn't remember what day of the week it was, he still depended on her to talk to the doctor for him. it was a long established pattern on both of their parts, and he couldn't give it up even when it made no sense to continue it. that one baffles me!
Unless the relationship is obviously and dangerously dysfunctional, I don't really care who answers my questions on admission. In fact, it's much more irritating to NOT have the partner there to answer the questions that the other partner is not equipped to answer. I've been known to figuratively hold hostage a partner until my admission assessment is done just to get it all the information. I hate having to tell the AM nurse that I couldn't get all the home medications reconciled.
My husband to be is like that, similar to the other poster who wakes her husband up every morning. I have to wake him up every morning, even on out-of-town trips as well! He can't remember the name of any medical condition he's ever had let alone any medication he's taken. If there is something wrong, I have to document every symptom and incidence as he just cannot remember it. Since he doesn't remember it someone has to, and of course it is going to be me. My mind is like a steel trap when it comes to this stuff. I had HL Stage 2B and I can still rattle off every med, surgery, blood draw, etc. that I had. Actually, I can probably give you my complete medical history since age 3! For some people, that's just how it is. On that note, my husband can't for the life of him remember my phone number, social security number, birthday, middle name, etc. That list could go on. I would never say this to his or my future mother-in-law but since he's the youngest I'm fairly certain that he was raised with someone remembering and doing all these things for him. However, when it comes to something Geology related (he's a Field Geologist) the man can rattle off the most obscure facts.
Specializes in All Icus x Nicu/ Shock Trauma/flight nur.
This is a great topic...thanks for sharing it. A few things come to my mind, for instance women can be as abusive as a man and man submissive, who know's, maybe thre into BDSM? Then there is that ever present chance that a c-pipe was hit on before coming in for care. I would love to know what thier complaint was to begin with, if you were ever able to find out. I hope to see what others think about this presentation...FLTNRSE
... I'm quite sure you have your own "Baffled moments with patients" I'm interested in hearing a few as well~
CrunchRN, ADN, RN
4,556 Posts
Oh pulease - we all know the average man is totally incompetent to answer questions correctly......