So many of you are amazing people and nurses. The time you put in responding to posts on Allnurses really does make a difference.
BUT.
When people come here asking for advice on a situation, they are not looking for your opinion of them as a person or their behavior. You all know what threads I'm talking about.
It's one thing to point out that their behavior could potentially be dangerous to patients.
It's one thing to be honest and tell them that their future doesn't look too bright.
It's one thing to suggest they may find seeing a therapist very helpful.
It's another to tell them they are mentally ill, mock them RELENTLESSLY, or judge them. When you do this to your fellow nurses (that have just come to you for advice), you're worse than that poor, scared soul you FLAMED for thinking a drug abuser may have a bloodborne illness.
These posters are often simply desperate, scared, or just plain curious!
I know it's important to have a thick skin when you work in healthcare, and I sure as heck am not busting out the trigger-words bully†or NETY.†It's just that even in my CNA class, it was emphasized over and over that it's not our place to judge patients. Can't you afford the same courtesy to other nurses?
I'm generally a pretty quiet person, but I believe in standing up for other people. So I just had to put this out there.
No, literally. I did not write the NANDA-I book, although have contributed my on various diagnoses when asked, am on a NANDA-I committee (entirely volunteer, so no conflict of interest when I recommend the book), and have contributed to the next edition of a verrrrrry popular nursing diagnosis "handbook" even though I wish they did more to teach from the source (they paid me a bit for that, but not much and no ongoing royalties so I don't care if you buy it or not, so long as you get the NANDA-I too :) ).
As a lifelong angry curmudgeonly jackass, I've gotten in my fair share of trouble on the Internet and in real life.
Miraculously, I still have a lot of friends, and a significant other and family who love me. Somehow I've managed to retain employment, and have great co-worker relationships and references too. I function, in my own way, in adult mainstream life. I've probably PO'd just as many people as I've made happy in life, and that's just fine with me. My loved ones tolerate me with a twisted mix of amusement and gratefulness.
I'm a realist, and generally hate idiots just enough to not really care if my directness and abrasiveness drives them away.
I am a fan of crabby, unreasonable, argumentative, rotten and black-hearted cynics who speak the truth no matter what the cost, for they are my tribe.
The most constructive criticism is also often the most abrasive.
Hug the curmudgeons of the world, for we are a desperately needed faction of humanity in this world of false cheer and fake platitude.
I know when I was working, I would skip down the halls singing "La la, la la la..." while strewing flower from a wicker basket and being followed by woodland creatures. Oh yeah, and the bluebird of happiness sat on my shoulder the whole time.
Isn't that how it is for everyone else in nursing?
Careful, you're starting to sound like one of my patients. But then, I've heard you have to be crazy to go into nursing...
OP, I am glad you said you are NOT using NETY...that topic always gets me giddy for some reason...and I have some silly responses to it. I guess because sometimes new nurses can be (NOT all....no, no!) a little "know it all" too....and need a reality check, IMO. I remember giving some pointers to a new nurse orienting a couple separate times, respectively, and the responses I got were so "challenging"...
As a lifelong angry curmudgeonly jackass, I've gotten in my fair share of trouble on the Internet and in real life.
Miraculously, I still have a lot of friends, and a significant other and family who love me. Somehow I've managed to retain employment, and have great co-worker relationships and references too. I function, in my own way, in adult mainstream life. I've probably PO'd just as many people as I've made happy in life, and that's just fine with me. My loved ones tolerate me with a twisted mix of amusement and gratefulness.
I'm a realist, and generally hate idiots just enough to not really care if my directness and abrasiveness drives them away.
I am a fan of crabby, unreasonable, argumentative, rotten and black-hearted cynics who speak the truth no matter what the cost, for they are my tribe.
The most constructive criticism is also often the most abrasive.
Hug the curmudgeons of the world, for we are a desperately needed faction of humanity in this world of false cheer and fake platitude.
:yes:Thank you SO much for saying this! Too many times I've had the desire to ask a question I really wanted to post on here, but was afraid because of how quick the responders are to judge and bash. It's quite discouraging...
Bless his heart, my sweet husband thinks so. :) Not too bad for an old bat.
Although when my GYN asked me if I were having any menopausal symptoms, hot flashes, night sweats, and the like, I said, "It's hard to tell. I have a cat who likes to sleep on my head, and their basal temp is something like 102degF. I always wake up hot and sweaty." He about fell off his little rolly stool laughing.
So many of you are amazing people and nurses. The time you put in responding to posts on Allnurses really does make a difference.
BUT.
When people come here asking for advice on a situation, they are not looking for your opinion of them as a person or their behavior. You all know what threads I'm talking about.
It's one thing to point out that their behavior could potentially be dangerous to patients.
It's one thing to be honest and tell them that their future doesn't look too bright.
It's one thing to suggest they may find seeing a therapist very helpful.
It's another to tell them they are mentally ill, mock them RELENTLESSLY, or judge them. When you do this to your fellow nurses (that have just come to you for advice), you're worse than that poor, scared soul you FLAMED for thinking a drug abuser may have a bloodborne illness.
These posters are often simply desperate, scared, or just plain curious!
I know it's important to have a thick skin when you work in healthcare, and I sure as heck am not busting out the trigger-words bully†or NETY.†It's just that even in my CNA class, it was emphasized over and over that it's not our place to judge patients. Can't you afford the same courtesy to other nurses?
I'm generally a pretty quiet person, but I believe in standing up for other people. So I just had to put this out there.
Thank-you This is a great post and well written. I agree that we are here to educate each other by sharing our knowledge and prof/ personal experiences. Its a great thing to take away posts, replies, and articles to advance the profession.
Could we be dealing with the multi-generational nursing workforce beliefs and values?
.thumb.jpg.fe2a3c72e07052e505bb41bf06ef93fc.jpg){kind=small}
nurseprnRN, BSN, RN
1 Article; 5,116 Posts
Nah, just like the students -- I make it all up as I go along.
God'll getcha for that, RNsRWe!!