You Might Not Want to Read This

[rn_xoxo]

I am a NURSE.

Did I make a mistake? Am I going to regret this for the rest of my life?

These thoughts keep running through my head. I roll around in bed, eating pizza and feeling sorry for myself. Nursing school was so hard. It took up a lot of my time, energy, money...and let's not forget the mental stress. When I first started telling people I am a nursing major is when I realized how negative people can be and how they crush your soul a little without even realizing it. Strangers, family, and friends.

I rarely heard words of encouragement "You know it is really hard to get into nursing school, you will be waiting forever."

Fast forward. I applied to an associate degree program in my area. Got in. "So isn't a Bachelor degree what you need?"

Fast forward. Graduation. "You know, it is nearly impossible to find a nursing job." "So you're going to be wiping people's butts for a living?"

I just wanted to shake these ignorant people. I did not shed blood, sweat, and tears for someone to think that my only task would be cleaning feces. I could write a book on all the things I have heard about my choice in profession.

The NCLEX was a traumatic experience. I told myself that if I failed it, that is it. I could not go through that type of exam again. I passed. I then started applying to what felt like a million nursing positions in hospitals. Not one call. Rejection emails flooded my inbox. I was tired of my job in sales so I decided to go ahead and apply to skilled nursing facilities. You know, what people look down on. Got an interview... got hired. I wasn't thrilled but I was happy to be using my license that I worked so hard for.

Met with a group of friends from nursing school for dinner. One of us in the group of 6 landed a hospital job. That was no surprise since she had worked there 10 plus years as a Unit Secretary/Nurse Assistant. First thing out of her mouth "How much are they paying you?" I reluctantly told her, in front of everyone. "You should really get a hospital job." Insinuating how much more money she makes. I wanted to scream. Everyone congratulated her, but not me. My job wasn't exciting and I didn't make $50+ an hour.

When will the negativity end? Why are nursing politics so prevalent? Who works where. Who makes what. New nurse versus seasoned nurse. Bachelor degree or Associate? Shouldn't we be united? Did we not all work hard for our license? Aren't we all smart?

I was no longer excited to go shop for scrubs. I sat through orientation at work with a headache and just wanted to cry. Truth is, I am scared. I am a new nurse. I don't know a lot, I have a lot to learn. However, how can I feel okay when I don't think I will get the support I need to thrive as a nurse? Did everyone at some point feel this way? I wanted to help people. I am caring and compassionate. I genuinely want to heal and make a difference.

I know it is not glamorous. I know it won't make me rich. Don't look down on me because I am a new graduate. Teach me. Guide me. Let me be great. It is not something you might have wanted to hear and I'm sure it didn't leave you with a warm, fuzzy feeling. But this is what I am going through. It is the truth and it is my experience.

[ThePrincessBride, MSN, RN, NP]

I could have written this article.

Nursing, for whatever reasons, seems to attract extremely competitive individuals. I went to nursing school with such a gal, and I cut her off from my life. No regrets.

Be proud of your accomplishments and the fact that you have are a PRACTICING nurse. I would give anything to have a job right now, as I am about to become unemployed (can't be a licensed professional AND a nursing assistant where I work).

I would strongly encourage you to ditch these so-called "friends."

[Rbeck911, BSN, RN]

You will understand when you have some more time under your belt. There are vindictive nurses out there, but the hard nurses, the brutally honest nurses, they have just developed that attribute from years of exposure to a broken and abused system. More often than not it is nothing personal.

[Alwystdnt86]

I'm at the very beginning of this nursing journey but so far I have gotten the same comments. There are apparently a million reasons why I should not go into nursing. I think with all of the healthcare changes, people in general are doing what they always do; playing upon their own fears and seeking company. Everyone does it. My family has been tough on me about getting into the health industry. I'm almost 30 and working for the family business. Over the past 5 years I've concluded that I was not made to work behind a desk all day. The naysayers are not always right and I've determined that as long as I evaluate the pros and cons and make the best decision I can with what I have been given, then I've done the best thing. With accepting the responsibility to make my own choices, I also accept any negative consequences I experience. I also get to accept any positive benefits that might come from it as well. I have definitely taken the things people say into consideration but I have made this choice and I will fully accept the consequences/benefits of it, whatever they may be. I tend to be a people pleaser and need that approval from the people closest to me. However, that's not the most fulfilling way to live. Thankfully, I have a husband and others who do support me. I hope you can find those people in your life. But if not, don't be bitter; just be a better nurse because of it! Take your time and find the positives in your new position. Don't worry about what others are doing or making. I've come to learn that even the people who seem to have it all together in some areas also have areas of struggle that I wouldn't ever want to deal with in my personal life. There are hurting and sick people everywhere and hopefully that is where your true passion lies anyway. The best of wishes to you!

[la_chica_suerte85, BSN, RN]

You know what? I think, like others have said, you're placing too much on needing other people like your cohort mates to help you feel better about your situation. LTC is fine, it's a good job. You're doing what you need to do to get your experience -- you're paying your dues. Your "friend" just happened to be in the right place/right time type of situation. She will likely be at the place she works at for the rest of her career (sounds boring to me and, if her motive is money, then -- she will either burnout or be a less-than-stellar nurse, especially in proportion to her pay). You, however, are getting a more well-rounded experience and, you'll have opportunities like Pt Care Mgr as mentioned before.

People talk a lot of this and that but it's not really what you're after. You want people who will teach and mentor you -- you only get that from people who have been before where you're trying to be, you know? So the others have nothing to offer you. Let them and their careless comments go. It's not helping you move forward. Learn all you can and be the best you can be. There are those unique badass types in every type of nursing -- be that unique badass.

[malamud69, BSN, RN]

You've simply described capitalism and the moral degradation of the worth of the individual worker...nursing is the same...you could insert any job...better start self-education of such things if you want to "survive..."

[nervousnurse, ASN]

((( Hugs )))) to you!!! I didn't have such negative experiences like you did, and I hope it gets better for you!!!

I also had wonderful preceptors when I was brand new and nervous!!! I pray you do, too! Of course there are

ALWAYS a few negative people wherever you work, but you HAVE to ignore them!! I admit that at my most recent position, I did let the negative people get me down, and also, my confidence was shattered.....But thankfully, that was the ONLY place I've worked where the morale (and management) were SO horrible, it just made

everything worse. Other than that, I have worked with some wonderful people, those who are willing to teach and help, and I hope you do, too!!!

It has always infuriated me when experienced nurses won't SHARE their knowledge/ helpful hints, etc. because it's not about their EGOS, it's about the PATIENT....so why not share their knowledge to make it better for THE PATIENT??? I think that gets forgotten a lot !!!

! I also USED to compare

myself to my school friends who had more "prestigious" positions, but I let that go, too!!! (( hugs ))

[Wrench Party]

Haters gonna hate. So far I've been going the non-traditional route (clinic at

fine. Just by the math alone, not everyone can work in the hospital.

Also, remember, inpatient hospital jobs are the endangered species here, and most job growth will be in LTC, LTACH, primary care and

anywhere but the hospital.

[mecapon91]

I am in school so anyone can correct me if I am wrong!

Even in other jobs the market is tough. Most places want you to have 2-5 years experience which obviously most grads dont have. Your first job may not be your dream job. Most peoples are not (Heck my first job out of school (the first time) was totally hell!) But get that experience! Work hard, learn new things! It will strengthen your future applications!

[mmc51264, BSN, MSN, RN]

I started in a LTC rehab unit. I loved the people I worked with. It was not my ideal job, but it was job. As a nurse. I was in charge of up to 20 pts-all post-op joints. I ran for 8 hours bringing pain meds. I charted by hand.

I learned time management like no one's business, I learned how to prioritize-fast, I learned how to call the MD at night and mean it. I grew more confident. Then there came an opening for my ultimate dream job and I got it. I cried the day I got it. I felt bad leaving a place that had been good to me, but I knew I HAD to take my dream position.

You will learn so much in Skilled nursing, you will to appreciate what your aides do, you will learn not to be above a disimpaction or a suppository or wiping a butt while giving your pt dignity and respect and compassion. I think there are many a nurse that need to have that experience. You will learn to appreciate a population that others have dismissed. Use this as the wonderful learning opportunity that it is.

This experience will make you a better nurse. I promise.

[SeattleJess]

First of all, congratulations on your stellar achievements, including getting into nursing school, graduating nursing school, passing the NCLEX on the first try, and (maybe toughest of all) landing a job! The fact that you did it with such a dirt poor support system makes me think you are a pretty amazing person.

Cut the negatives out of your life and replace them with positives. Positive, supportive people are out there. I know because I am one. I would NEVER have spoken to anyone in any of your situations the way people have spoken to you. Sadly, nursing school does seem to attract some shark-like, competitive and even mean-spirited people. Undoubtedly many of them make it into nursing. But there are always positive and kind people to be found. Find them. (I know you can, you are obviously extremely competent.)

[cdgoldilocks]

I have been a nurse since 1997. The new grad in the hospital is no more "special" to me than the new grad in the LTC or in any other setting. New grads are little baby birds who don't know what they don't know. They need observation and assistance, and something they need knocked off their high horse a peg or two. And no, I am not mean. I am "the trainer" at every job I have ever had. I am telling your this because your "friend" thinks she is extra special because she thinks is is somehow better than you because he is in the hospital and you are not. We "seasoned" nurses do not care. Once you have your RN license, you have been welcomed to the club. Congratulations! It takes a few months of solid, full time work for things to really "click"; for it to feel natural. Take each job as an opportunity to learn all you can learn, make friends. You NEVER know the connections you will make that will help you immensely later.

[michlynn, BSN, RN]

This basically sounds like my life story. The only job I could find right out of school was a skilled nursing facility and I hated it but I was so excited to actually have a JOB that I didn't care. That only last for 2 months before I called it quits because it was such an unsafe environment and I didn't want to have any part in it. So, I went back to bartending and after a few months landed a job in a hospital on a floor that I really enjoy. I think you just have to find the area that you're really interested in and it will fall into place. It takes time, but you'll be ok!