after 35 years, I cannot believe it

[Carolyn1234]

After a 35 year career, today may end it. After 20 years of hospital work, I was recruited by a surgical practice to be their lead nurse. I have now worked with this group for 15 years. I became a grandma in November (an answer to prayer!) and have been looking forward to a little time with this baby. I had asked the group for a two month leave of absence in September. Without getting into specifics, this leave is VERY important to me. This morning, I was told that they were not granting this leave. One doctor actually said to me "I am sorry about this but I can't imagine running this practice without you for 9 weeks" I am crushed. I have worked like an ox for this group and have never asked for anything. I am 58 years old. I feel like they are taking a calculated risk but thinking that I am too old to quit. My husband says we don't need the money and I should give notice tomorrow. I wonder if I even want to give notice. I do not want to work here any longer.

Please, what would you do?

[JustBeachyNurse, LPN]

Why not just FMLA them for something? It's the law. You don't ruffle feathers, they can't do much to you, and you can always come back if you want, but in the meantime you could burn your PTO and sick time and if you decide to come back great, if not oh well. If they can you while on FMLA that's not going to go well for them.

If they can't respect you for 2 months off after all your years of service then I would use the law to get what you want and make them pound sand.

FMLA does not apply to grandchildren only child birth. So not an option.

Give respectable notice and be professional. You never know what the future may hold. Don't let emotions take over

[canigraduate]

I would suggest the same thing as a PP. Tell them you're leaving between such and such dates and offer them the chance to give you a leave of absence versus losing you forever. You aren't the supplicant here since you don't need them.

If they can't run the practice without you for nine weeks... You have a major bargaining tool. Use it.

[kbrn2002, ADN, RN]

Since you sound like this job has been good up until now have you explained that this leave is vital enough to you that if it is not granted you will have to quit when the time comes? If you have and the answer is still no then by all means leave as long as you are financially able to do so. Just be smart about it and wait until you are a month shy of needing to leave to give notice. Make sure to use all your available vacation/PTO before you go otherwise you are throwing that money away.

Unless of course you work for an employer that will pay out your unused vacation when you go, if that is the case leave whenever you feel like it as long as it is after the first of the year or whenever your years worth of vacation time is available.

[BuckyBadgerRN, ASN, RN]

She may not qualify if the group is a small one!

Why not just FMLA them for something? It's the law. You don't ruffle feathers, they can't do much to you, and you can always come back if you want, but in the meantime you could burn your PTO and sick time and if you decide to come back great, if not oh well. If they can you while on FMLA that's not going to go well for them.

If they can't respect you for 2 months off after all your years of service then I would use the law to get what you want and make them pound sand.

[ProgressiveActivist, BSN, RN]

When you submit your resignation, they may say what can we do to change your mind.

You say what are you offering.

Negotiate for the time off, a raise, better hours, tuition reimbursement, more PTO.

[AuDDoc]

FMLA does not apply to grandchildren only child birth. So not an option.

Give respectable notice and be professional. You never know what the future may hold. Don't let emotions take over

You misunderstood. Have a minor procedure done. Use said procedure as reason to get FMLA. Use downtime to heal and enjoy new grandkids.

[elkpark]

You misunderstood. Have a minor procedure done. Use said procedure as reason to get FMLA. Use downtime to heal and enjoy new grandkids.

FMLA only applies to employers with more than 50 employees. That's a pretty big medical practice.

[Horseshoe, BSN, RN]

I would give a very measured, calm, rational, and professional resignation letter. Give plenty of notice and don't call in sick in the meantime. You will want to have a good reference from these people.

When you are ready to think about working again, apply to other surgical practices as a PRN. I do PRN for a plastic surgery practice. When they are short and I agree to come in, they are always THRILLED and so nice to me.

Yes, you deserve better after all your years. But you can also take it as a compliment that you are viewed as indispensable!

[NursesRmofun, ASN, RN]

I agree with most of all the responses. Do what you want. Give notice or don't. If you don't need the income, it's all good. Enjoy!

[Ginger's Mom, MSN, RN]

Your talking about taking a leave that is almost a year away? So many things can happen between now an then. Good you know where they stand, take your vacation time etc, look for another job, and then a month before give you notice in a professional manner. I would be hurt that could not accommodate this request, but you know where you stand.

[rnkaytee]

I took it to mean she asked for the leave in September (2 months ago) and it is now being denied, not that the leave is starting in September (9 months away).

[LPNtoRNin2016OH, LPN]

Never, ever burn a bridge. God forbid something happen to your husband and he can no longer work? Give your two weeks at least. Or do as others said tell them you need that time off and if they cannot accommodate, you will have to move on. It isn't unusual though for a company to not let an employee off for 9 weeks if it isn't health related. I am not saying it's all right but just that they are not being unusually cruel so quitting without notice would not be something I would do. But its your life ultimately and you need to do what is best for you, just consider all the angles first.