Why Do Nurses Eat Their Own?

As current times have shown, we're short staffed. Administration wants to make money. So cuts are made to equipment and man power. Who has your back? Who can you rely on? Your fellow nurses? I'm not so sure anymore. Why do we as nurses eat our own when we should be teaching them and guarding them as our own. The fact is as we age our young nurses are going to be taking care of us, but there are those all too eager beavers who will in fact burn you. This is my experience. Nurses Announcements Archive Article

This is my own personal experience as to why nurses eat their own? I have been in nursing for 20+ years. I've watched a lot of nurses come and go and some trying to move up that corporate food chain leaving a path of destruction a mile wide in their path. It's a very sad thing to have witnessed nursing go from a caring environment to a volatile, stressful, "me" environment.

I personally have never thrown anyone under the bus but I have been thrown under the bus by a nurse trying to move up. I was shocked, not to be naive but how callus and calculating this nurse had become in such a short period of time. She was a new grad. I took her under my wing, taught her in a specialty area just to be told shortly thereafter that there were going to be cuts in this area, and I was one of the people being cut along with approximately 20 more nurses. I then found out that my underling I had taught was at the helm of helping administration make these cuts based on who had been there longest, made the most per hour and new grads or new hires would be cheaper. So it was done and my underling moved up to an office of ease while the rest of us were dispersed throughout the facility or some even let go destroying lives and careers.

Once moved to another area of the facility I witnessed a male nurse dating several other female nurses turning them against each other and ending up dating a charge nurse that was best friends with the manager of that department, so they were allowed to cuddle up at the nurses' station and pretty much did nothing else other than sneak outside. Yes all of this was reported by others than myself, however administration didn't care, bottom line was man hours not pt care.

I've since left that facility after many years. I am now at a new facility and have already picked up on the "eager" young nurses more than willing to talk behind other nurses' backs. This is disappointing. The nursing school and instructors of old that I had the privilege of going to and being taught by would be appalled and would not have tolerated for one moment. Is loyalty, character and earning your title without harming something taught in nursing schools? Should certain psychiatric characters be red flags for school administrators be implemented to prevent cannibalism within nursing?

I feel as if those great women who pioneered nursing to care for the sick, indigent and wounded would be so saddened by the "General Hospital", "Grays Anatomy"; "high school acting" nurses of today. On that note I don't want to diminish the fact that nurses have to be go-getters, usually type A, hungry for knowledge; however there's a professional line where we should have each other's back.

Nurses go to college to achieve a degree of higher learning along with all the nursing classes. You're professionals, intellectuals. Would you compromise your name, integrity and reputation for a easier schedule, a desk job, an office? All you have to do is help relocate or terminate 20 to 25 fellow nurses?

I am curious to the opinions of others, so please post. BTW this underling was moved back down the food chain and eventually out the door and with no friends or references to rely on now.

Before going down this road ask yourself. Why did I become a nurse? To help others who need it or to eat my young? If you answer or turn into the later, I fear you may be in the wrong profession...

Specializes in Registered Nurse.
azureblue said:
The OP's post was a description of a type of NETY, so the title is only a bit generalized. IMHO, nurses eat their young because we are an abused profession. We are told what to do by administrators, families, doctors, etc., and told what we should be able to do and with how little. Abused children frequently grow up to be abusers. Experienced nurses frequently say abusive comments to newer nurses, implying that the new nurse will never be "as good as" the experienced one. The cycle needs to stop.

The "blame" mentality is alive and well in nursing. That's what leads to stressful working conditions. In the 90's, the organization I work for was a small company. I recall attending meetings where systems errors were discussed and how to improve outcomes without blaming people. It was a pleasant atmosphere, issues were openly discussed, and nurses were less defensive. There was more conflict resolution. I don't know what happened to the "system error" mentality. When we speak of mistakes or errors or incidents today, nurses start pointing fingers and management gets the red pen out to write a review, a verbal warning... It is so much harder to be a nurse in 2016.

Ruby Vee said:
In the past several years, it seems that most of the new grads who are hired into the ICU aren't there because they want to take care of the patients or actually work in the ICU. They're there because it will look good on a resume when they go to anesthesia school or NP school. Which they plan to do just as soon as they can get into school. We had one new grad who was having a lot of difficulty -- we nurses her along and provided an unprecedented nine months of orientation . . . Only to have her resign one week after her prolonged orientation ended so she could go to anesthesia school. That girl was scary! I'm surprised she even made it off orientation -- no common sense. And she's probably passing gas somewhere.

I don't mind someone going on to improve themselves, follow their dream, get more education after they've mastered the basics. But please master the basics before you start planning to leave!

Being a bedside nurse is not an endpoint for a lot of people anymore. I do not know why. I think many of the "young" generation does not aspire to spending a working lifetime in a profession where people are often under recognized and underpaid. This is the generation who grew up with a trophy for fifth place. A nurse practitioner sounds way more important than "just a nurse." There are lots of things going on with those coming up in the workforce now. If you want to be an NP or CRNA, then you can defer your mega sized loans if you go right back to school. If you get 5 years experience at the bedside, you will be well in the hole paying off the BSN when you get some skills and confidence to go on to NP school. Then... you can take on a new loan on top of what you already have.

Who wants to work nights and weekends for the rest of your life? You gotta have a social life and if you have kids, you have to go to EVERY game, EVERY recital, and read them a bedtime story EVERY night. A parent can't be involved or interested, they must be immersed in their child's every move. A schedule working at an office is much more conducive to the type of parenting which society promotes. No nights, no weekends, no holidays. No compromising.

A lot of the younger staff do not get a lot of satisfaction knowing that they are very much needed on nights, weekends, and holidays. I witnessed a nurse bawling because she had to work Christmas and she had a young child. Why don't they have people like "X" working on Christmas? She is 50 years old. Who does she need to be home for Christmas morning? Never mind that poor old "X" may have worked 20 Christmases! (Who else thinks maybe those who have weathered many holidays should get the privilidge of being off if not needed???) Woe to that hospital if the crying nurse's child went to the ED on a holiday and all of the nurses were off. The world would surely end if she did not get seen ASAP.

Surely, it is a scarey world in which to grow old. There are many out there who are book smart and experiencially mediocre. I think we should be nurturing, but honest with our newbies. Maybe the anesthesia school should ask to speak to the preceptors if the person has the bare minimum of experience. How about some scholarships or loan forgiveness for the seasoned nurse pursuing an advanced degree?

Hmmmph.

I like to eat young nurses. There, I said it.

Especially the ones who are trying to kill my patients. And the ones who come in with a know it all attitude and are unteachable.

I find the entitled ones the most tasty.

That's something to think about. Maybe all this blather about nurses eating their young comes from the unsafe and unteachable nurses who don't like to be corrected. Maybe it comes from the older nurses who are inflexible and unable to assimilate new knowledge or deal with the differences in a younger generation. Frankly, I think a lot of comes from nurses who like to moan and complain and have few interpersonal skills.

I don't deny that lateral violence exists. It has happened to me, but not as a nurse. What little bit of incivility I have seen in the hospital setting is on a middle school level and is easily dealt with. I get more problems from administration and cranky night shift docs than I do from other nurses.

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
Jnateman said:
I worked in nursing since 1987 and I became a nurse practitioner in 1991. I worked pre admitting and employee health at the same job till 2005. I left to work more flexible times and hours since I had 2 children. Now I am trying to get back in the hospital since my kids are older and the hospitals are not recognizing that I have been working all along and a nurse recruiter at University of Miami commented that I have not been in a hospital in a long time. I feel like I am being treated like I have the plague. So what if I have not been in a hospital in a long time, everything in a profession has to be learned usually after a job starts so I do not understand why this is a problem. Some people should not be in certain jobs if they have an additive like that. There is so much pettiness in nursing because it is a female dominated profession.

You can't get a hospital job because you have no recent hospital experience and you think it's pettiness due to nursing being a female dominated profession?

Did you ever think maybe it's your attitude?

milesims said:
I completely agree with you. When pride is at stake, many simply pull seniority, and not qualifications, to dismiss what they don't think is "right" to them. This is really a toxic way of thinking and does not allow room for self-improvement, in my point of view.

This "cycle of abuse" is extremely childish.

You know banterings is not a nurse, but some kind of anti vaxx mysterious lawyer type guy, right?

I mean, he may make sense to you, but about being a nurse? He knows nothing, Jon Snow.

(And he doesn't watch GOT!)

Farawyn said:
You know banterings is not a nurse, but some kind of anti vaxx mysterious lawyer type guy, right?

I mean, he may make sense to you, but about being a nurse? He knows nothing, Jon Snow.

(And he doesn't watch GOT!)

Right. Bantering's is not a nurse, so his opinion on people's behavior doesn't matter, right? Only nurses know that kind of stuff. If that "anti-vax lawyer" thing is true, then shame on him. However, it has nothing to do with the current subject.

If you read through the comments, it's as plain as day to see what kind of childish environment is on this thread from grown adults. There are a few individuals here who use seniority and experience as justification for "facts" on a general population, and blame young, ambitious nurses for their shortcomings. You don't have to be a nurse or an "anti-vax lawyer mysterious guy" to see that. These few individuals think that it's alright to generalize an entire population of nurses, just because they met a few bad ones. If they think it's okay to generalize an entire population of nurses, I wonder what they think about generalizing other populations :sour: It makes me sick to think about it.

It is a toxic mindset and it's helping nobody.

P.S. I don't even watch GOT :cry:

The answers are all in GOT.

Farawyn said:
The answers are all in GOT.

LMAO :roflmao:

Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.
JimmyDurham9 said:
That evidence should make most of us hang our heads in shame. Somewhere along the way, we nurses lose the part of us that makes us human. You don't like the inflammatory title, tough. Our predecessors bestowed it on us.

No we didn't. That's a scurrilous bit of hackneyed tripe.

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Write your own EBP articles refuting the idea of nurses eating their young. Prove all the studies wrong. Show people it doesn't really exist. I wish you luck in that endeavor.

Well, we could do that, except that one problem we have is that when it comes to humans behaving badly, I don't need to read a boatload of jargon to identify it.

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Because from my work and research on the issue for the ANA's position statement and my own personal experience in nursing, I can safely say I have never encountered a group of individuals so petty, mean-spirited, ugly, unprofessional, cruel, and down right hateful than in nursing. Nursing takes the cake for having some of the most disrespectful, passive aggressive, bad attitude individuals- from floor to administration.

That will be a position statement for the ages . . although I wonder if the ANA can stand some scrutiny regarding the bias of their writers going in. I almost felt a pang of remorse at the unvarnished nature of my post but then I read the stuff in italics again and feel much better.

Weird title, otherwise these newer nurses (basically millenials) are what I like to call "self promoters" that will do *ANY THING* to promote themselves. There is no team for them. It is all about them and what they can do to make themselves look good. This is nothing new and I believe throwing people under the bus is routine for them. They are more about "what can I get from you" then they will dispose of you. They are entitled and cocky while being lazy at the same time, it's made work so interesting since we have started hiring millenials.

milesims said:
So, management made a comment on how "cute and perky" a young nurse was, and you assume that THAT was the reason they hired her? How self-centered. Are you saying if you were "cute and perky" you would get the position easily? Is this how you place blame on things that you cannot change?

You really took management seriously when they said, "We hired her because she was so darn cute and perky?" Really? It sounds like a joke to me, and I'm pretty sure her resume doesn't say "so darn cute and perky" on it.

These generalizations and blame on young nurses are not going to aid in your self-improvement or better your life. It's best to let it go.

Well, this cute and perky thing has happened where I work. We had a couple of openings and I refered two seasoned nurses I had worked with prior who could do the job with one arm tied behind their backs, however, my boss chose to hire two "young & cute" nurses, who she then refered to as her "eye candy " to take with her to meet potential clients. And yes, these two millenials nurses would sit and shop for shoes while we were not busy, and I would do the busy work that needed to be done. I actually addressed their shopping for shoes a couple of times with them and I was ridiculed and told I was jelous of them because I couldn't wear high heels, then a nice "begone b***h." So, this is what the future looks like with millenials. They have been doted upon since birth, given awards they didn't earn and now we are paying the price.

I don't know but it is one of the things I like least about nursing. I have not found it everywhere I have worked as a nurse, but I gave run into it a lot more here than in other professions in which I have worked. It reminds me of Junior High sometimes. Maddening.