It's been awhile since we had a stupid nurse tricks thread, so here goes: How to look Incredibly Stupid Without Really Trying:
Call in to work because it's snowed and it's "not worth your life to drive to work on those roads." Be in a bar down the street from the hospital when your best friend at work uses the "Find My Friends" app on her iPhone to check on when her replacement will get there in to relieve her. (Will you lose your job?)
You've got horrible abdominal pain, but you suck it up and come to work anyway. Yay, you! You collapse in your patient's room and are whisked off to the ER by your manager and an RT. You insist that you're infertile and couldn't possibly be pregnant as you're delivered of a full term baby girl. (OK, this one was a CNS and nursing student.)
Call in sick to work because you want to go to your manager's wedding and you didn't win the "get the weekend off" lottery. Catch the bouquet. (And lose your job.)
You're having palpitations, and you're a little lightheaded and slightly diaphoretic. Strangers at the mall are concerned and offer to call an ambulance. You decline, telling them you're fine. Then you think that you probably should go to the ER, but since you know from AN that you won't get a sandwich to eat, you sit down at Bertucci's and order a plate of ravioli. Then you drive yourself to the ER, park at the bottom of a hill and walk uphill to the entrance. You're surprised when the triage nurse takes you straight back. (Yes, that was me. I was fine.)
Tell everyone at work that you're young, you want to have fun, and you're going to a friend's Halloween party after work. Go to the party dressed as a sexy nurse, and be in lots of pictures. Post those pictures on Facebook. Now call in sick to work the next day at 06:50 for your 07:00 shift. You've friended everyone you work with on FaceBook. (And NOT lose your job. What are the odds?)
Steal money from your colleagues' bags in the breakroom. Get caught by a colleague with a black belt in tae kwon do. Be photographed with a 5 foot tall girl flipping you and then sitting on you until Security arrives. (Have your manliness questioned by everyone who sees the pictures.)
During post-partum clinical, I was having trouble "popping" those cold packs that have the beads in them. It was in front of my instructor, and I was embarrassed, so I put some extra muscle into it.
The pack exploded, and the beads went everywhere, many into my instructor's hair...and lots down the front of her blouse.
Specializes in Ambulatory Surgery, Ophthalmology, Tele.
Nurse: Go ahead and hang this new IV bag. Just hang the new bag on the pole. Then just take that spike out of the old bag and put it into the new one.
Me: (removes spike while bag is still hanging and gets a nice bath of NS)
:embarrassing:
Hooking up a piggy back bag and forgetting to clamp the tubing thus doing my best firefighter impression of IV "fire hose" spraying across the room. Eventually.......I quit doing this. It took a few times during my first few months to remember to clamp the stinkin' tubing.
She felt she should be granted that, but failed to understand that her medical issue was due to lying about being ill and going skiing instead of going to clinical.
If she didn't realize just why she was kicked out of nursing because she didn't think what she did was wrong how reliable of a nurse would she have been if they allowed her to continue.
Thought that I, at 95 pounds, could let the 400 pound patient (that had crawled out of bed over the rails and was about to fall) slide slowly down my leg and gently to the floor just like I had been taught in school. Wrong. Fortunately her loud, demented, maniacal laughter got the attention of some of the staff who came into the room and saw my feet sticking out from under her. I nearly suffocated!!!
Are you talking about when Celine Dion "died?" Because someone went around on my unit that day announcing that but by about midnight we were all able to see that the rumor was not true. LOL![/quote']
Lol no it was a news story about the Olympics that I saw yesterday. It said someone responsible for messing up certain lighting at the opening ceremony was found murdered. I even included that the story had a statement from Russia saying "he could have fallen on 40 knives! This is an accidental death!"
Lol no it was a news story about the Olympics that I saw yesterday. It said someone responsible for messing up certain lighting at the opening ceremony was found murdered. I even included that the story had a statement from Russia saying "he could have fallen on 40 knives! This is an accidental death!"
I was reading that and it seemed legit until that quote. Sneaky internet about pulled a fast one on me
Taking care of a young A&O ICU patient (male, early 20s). Manipulating his IV catheter in his arm. My lovely sinuses decide to drip right onto his forearm. Gross! He was like, "that's cool". I was mortified.
Taking care of a young A&O ICU patient (male, early 20s). Manipulating his IV catheter in his arm. My lovely sinuses decide to drip right onto his forearm. Gross! He was like, "that's cool". I was mortified.
My nose dripped on a patient's toe once. So glad they were sedated and that there was no one else in the room!
Loudly pass gas in a baby patient's room at night. *Then* check to see if the baby's father has returned from the cafeteria yet. And yes he did.
Reassure a family that you will take good care of their daughter tonight. Only to find out it's their son (with one those unisex, non-descript names).
As a new and very helpful nurse, offer to call a priest in to comfort a religious family when their child is about to be transferred to PICU. Realize after the mother starts sobbing even louder that she is taking this as a sign that the child is about to die any minute. (They were not. They just needed a higher level of care.)
I am sure I can think of 100 more of these moments that I often wish I could forget forever. Love this thread!
Eventually.......I quit doing this. It took a few times during my first few months to remember to clamp the stinkin' tubing.
nursejoed
79 Posts
During post-partum clinical, I was having trouble "popping" those cold packs that have the beads in them. It was in front of my instructor, and I was embarrassed, so I put some extra muscle into it.
The pack exploded, and the beads went everywhere, many into my instructor's hair...and lots down the front of her blouse.