Sex-ed

Nurses General Nursing

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I asked the boys, about 40 of them, aged from 16-18 if they'd ever watched Media, and they all laughed.

'Shall I take that as a yes?' I asked, and there were further chuckles and nodding heads all round.

You see, as the school nurse, I'd been asked to talk to the senior boys about 'sex and all that sort of stuff.' With such vague guidelines, I chose to talk about an area that has been coming an ever increasing concern.

'Do you like it?' I asked, and no one said outright they liked it.

'Do you think it's healthy or harmful?' They all said it's harmless, because the participants were consenting adults. So I asked them what's their favorite type of Media, and the answers were varied, although hot young blondes, and horny teens topped the list of favorites.

'Was that 'horny teen' legal?' I asked, and the laughter died away. They'd never thought of that before, they'd also never thought of sex-slavery, but now wasn't the right time to talk about that, as I felt they would stop listening if I started lecturing.

Although Ivan, one of the Russian lads raised his hand in protest. 'But sir, I only watch **** Media.' The room erupted, and the merits of **** Media were briefly discussed. I decided to get personal.

I asked them to raise their if they wanted to get married and have kids one day, and they all raised their hands.

'So what age is it okay for your son to watch Media?' They paused, giving it serious thought, before generally deciding that around 14yrs old is good.

'And what age is it okay for your daughter to watch Media?' I was greeted with silence.

No one wanted their daughter to ever watch Media, because deep inside of them, they know Media is not good, and they know it is degrading to women, regardless of consent.

We talked about other things, from relationship to STD's, but only briefly, because there's only so much you can teach them in one-off, one hour session.

But I wasn't there to lecture them, but hopefully to get them to think.

I would have a problem with any sex ed teacher approaching any subject with any kind of judgmental tone. Just the facts, please.

I understand teen curiosity about Media. But I think that Media could be very scary for the younger kids and I hate it that it has now become so easily accessed. I don't think most of them are really ready to delve too much into the concept of sex other than just the basic facts. I would hate for a young child's first introduction to sex to be in the form of Media.

When my oldest D was about 9 or 10, she came to me and said she had gotten an email she didn't think she should have. I had told her not to open any email from anyone she didn't know. Well, she had apparently opened one, saw a photo and quickly clicked out of it. I told her she did the right thing and sent her back upstairs. I opened the email to see a photo shopped pic of Brittany Spears grinning like the Cheshire Cat, kneeling down before a guy with a full erect member. This was the early days of AOL, and it was from another AOL account holder. I emailed him, said I was going to report him for sending a child Media, how dare he, etc. He ended up apologizing and said he had been hacked and his whole address book plus screen names he'd never heard of had received that email from his account. He said he was mortified, etc.

Anyway, I went up to talk to my D, feeling awful that her innocence had been compromised like that. I said I'd handled the situation, what to do in the future if she received emails from unfamiliar addresses, etc. I ended the conversation by saying, "honey, I'm just so sorry you had to see a picture of Brittany Spears with a man's member in her face. I'm sure that was a little scary for you." She replied, "THAT was a member?! I thought it was a hot dog!"

I think I had to change the sheets after I told hubby about this in bed that night. We laughed so hard we both peed ourselves. He said "aren't you the one who said you should be attentive to how much information your kids are actually trying to get from you when you have these kinds of talks, and not to over share?" We still laugh about this now, and she's 25.

You're losing me a little here. We're discussing personal opinions and sharing what we are basing those opinions on. The world does change, but we can't decide opinions are irrelevant and choose to have none just because of that.

You're convincing me that I don't have a valid point but it's been based on today's Media including access is vastly different than what and how much was available pre Internet and the access kids had to it where kids can google just about anything anywhere way beyond consenting adult activity.

I have to correct myself on the age group in the OP, I remembered OP speaking to 14 yo boys but they were 16-18, and those boys thought 14 was okay to begin watching Media.

I have to correct myself on the age group in the OP, I remembered OP speaking to 14 yo boys but they were 16-18, and those boys thought 14 was okay to begin watching Media.

Gosh, there are so many more interesting, fun, educational things to do as a teenager. Besides being bent over a cell phone.

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Specializes in critical care.
You're convincing me that I don't have a valid point but it's been based on today's Media including access is vastly different than what and how much was available pre Internet and the access kids had to it where kids can google just about anything anywhere way beyond consenting adult activity.

I have to correct myself on the age group in the OP, I remembered OP speaking to 14 yo boys but they were 16-18, and those boys thought 14 was okay to begin watching Media.

For me, I think it helps that I was a teen when the Internet was growing to what it is now. It was still this brand new idea that you could go on the WWW and see anything. God knows my grandparents (who I lived with at the time) had no idea how to make sure I wasn't doing things I shouldn't. I'm 34 now, and I first learned how to navigate networks in general in the mid 90s. The graphics may have sucked, but we certainly had access to a world of Media back then. What's worse - we WEREN'T vigilant about avoiding dangerous situations, like online predators. I loved Usenet, and would casually email with people, telling them all kinds of personal info. I shared my home address with some, and we'd mail cultural items to one another. It's an absolute miracle I didn't get into real trouble. The Internet was the wild, Wild West back then. Thankfully, being online during those early years made me pretty aware of what to pay attention to now.

So, yes, dial up of 1994 did help prepare me as a parent for what my kids might get into now. And it has also helped me remain keenly aware that for every parental control, there is some app that overrides it. Paying attention and education is key.

I love that Christmas card.

True story:

Back in the day, our school began to teach sex Ed wayyyy before it was sop. There were no sex Ed textbooks back then so our beloved science teacher (I believe this was in 5 th grade) used

"Everything you wanted to know about sex*:

But we're afraid to ask."

Different times back then...

- Peace, love, and ice cream.

And a happy pappy day to all.

Specializes in critical care.
True story:

Back in the day, our school began to teach sex Ed wayyyy before it was sop. There were no sex Ed textbooks back then so our beloved science teacher (I believe this was in 5 th grade) used

"Everything you wanted to know about sex*:

But we're afraid to ask."

Different times back then...

- Peace, love, and ice cream.

And a happy pappy day to all.

Got to say.... The autocorrect to "we're" is rather hilarious to me, for some reason.

Got to say.... The autocorrect to "we're" is rather hilarious to me, for some reason.

Oopps.

Pretty good though!

Specializes in geriatrics.

This thread as well as the other two threads initiated by the OP have been interesting, to say the least.

Specializes in School nursing.
This surprises me coming from your perspective of a school nurse/educator, not the encouraging part but the seemingly idealistic part. My daughter, mainstream average and above average group of friends, mix of religious and non religious families, has told me of her friends who absolutely cannot talk to their parents, the parents just won't have an open personal discussion. I was surprised of some of the ones who couldn't.

Well, Libby, I tend to be an idealist at heart - trying my best to keep parents informed. The realist in me, however, does use the words "caring adult" when teaching, recognizing that for many students, that does NOT mean their parent or guardian. My goal is to have each student identify a caring adult over the age of 18 that they can have these conversations with.

Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.
Well, Libby, I tend to be an idealist at heart - trying my best to keep parents informed. The realist in me, however, does use the words "caring adult" when teaching, recognizing that for many students, that does NOT mean their parent or guardian. My goal is to have each student identify a caring adult over the age of 18 that they can have these conversations with.

Agree.

In my experiences as a Pedi nurse, I find a percentage of children who do NOT have a caring adult around who is a parent...especially when the parents are either children themselves or have some "growing up" to do...

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