When I was in nursing school, I was so excited to get finished and get a job. I thought I would enjoy doing nursing tasks all day...meds, IVs, injections, dressing changes, catheters, charting. I was so proud to tell people I was becoming a nurse. I would be making all of this good money. My job would be exciting all day long. I would be helping people. I would get respect...
But 5 years later, ha! What a joke! Don't get me wrong. I am grateful to have a degree. I am grateful to have a job in this bad economy, but nursing sure turned out to be a disappointment. I never thought that I would be worked to death the way nurses are. I never thought I would be talked to like a dog the way I am by patients, their families, people from other departments, and some doctors. I never thought bosses would be so quick to stab you in the back and try to get you in trouble. I thought I would be a valued employee and appreciated for what I did because I am a nurse who truly has a heart, cares about my patients, likes to get along well with others, and work as a team.
Instead, as a nurse you are treated like a peon. You have a team of 6-8 patients and are running like a mad woman to take care of all of them properly while your boss sits on her butt looking for any one tiny thing you might miss (while not offering to lift a finger to help you). Families sit in the room watching you like a hawk assuming you are going to hurt their family member. Griping because you have to turn people with skin issues or check for incontinence. Griping because you have to change an IV. The other day I had a family member sitting there watching me like a hawk as I had to change the patient's IV. Mind you the patient was an obese lady with huge arms and had had to have deep lines in the past. She said to me very rudely, "You get ONE stick, then somebody else is gonna do it." Then proceeded to stand and watch me with her arms folded across her chest. Excuse me, since when does the family dictate my job? That really burnt me up. Fortunately I got her IV on the first stick, but I have to take crap like that from people or I would probably be written up by my manager. I never thought nursing would be like this. When I visited people in the hospital before I was a nurse I had respect for the medical staff and would never dream of talking to them the way I am talked to.
You are blamed for everything. Doctor comes in late today? Nurse is yelled at about it by family. Doctor changes a medicine and doesn't tell the family about it? Nurse is grilled about it. Lab wakes you up early for blood draw? Nurse is yelled at about it. Doc orders stat MRI at 5 pm on a Friday? Nurse is yelled at about it by Radiology. Assistant doesn't check patient for incontinence while nurse is trying to start an IV in another room? Nurse is yelled at about it by family. Medicine is late from pharmacy? Nurse is yelled at about it. Dietary doesn't send up a food tray for a patient? Nurse is yelled at about it. We can do nothing right. It has really been disheartening. We go into nursing to help people and instead are treated like crap. I can honestly say that nursing is the job I have felt I have been the least respected in of all the jobs I have ever had. It has just been very disappointing. Maybe I am just venting because I have had a bad week, but just wondering if anyone else has felt this way? I WANT to like nursing because I spent all of this time getting this degree and getting licensed but wow.
I have tried to caution people looking into nursing that it is not all it is cracked up to be. Usually I get flamed. It is not for some people, matter of fact it is not for most people. I refused to endorse nursing to my daughter. She got her degrees in IT and IT management. She has a wonderful job where she is appreciated and paid well. I am so glad she is not a nurse. Her and her husband have full time daylight Monday thru Friday jobs with none of the problems that are caused by crazy hours and crazy shifts and working weekends and holidays. On summer weekends they take their camper camping, they have holidays off together. She has no idea what it is like not to be there when the kids open packages on Christmas morning. Why would anyone want to be a nurse?
Specializes in acute care med/surg, LTC, orthopedics.
Thanks for your reply. I would love to just send them all out of the room when I do any procedure but the hospital I work for now I feel doesn't have the nurse's back at all. I could see the family throwing a fit, complaining on me to my manager, and me getting fired over it. That's how much I don't trust the management at my hospital. That's another reason I have been applying at other jobs.
You would be fired for asking family to leave the room?
Would your union not file a wrongful dismissal grievance?
Specializes in Med-surge, hospice, LTC, tele, rehab.
You would be fired for asking family to leave the room?
Would your union not file a wrongful dismissal grievance?
I don't think I would be fired for asking a family to leave the room and they were ok with it. But if I asked them to leave the room even very nicely and they got mad (which really wouldn't surprise me) complained to my manager, or got the patient representative involved, etc., I would probably be written up for it. A few write ups on my job and I'm fired. We don't have a union at my hospital. Not that it would break my heart to leave there, but I can't be fired with no other income at the moment. I don't trust my managers as far as I could throw them. I think at one of my old hospitals, the managers may have had the nurses' backs in cases like this, but at this one, not at all.
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
I knew i had picked the wrong profession my first day of nursing school. The instructors were barracudas who made it seem like being a nurse was rocket science. They were old, unattractive, single,childless, and extremely passive-aggressive. Most of the education focused on care-planning (how many of you even pay attention to the care plans, or even have the time?), science, math, statistics--stuff we rarely use as a nurse. Nursing instructors need to let their students know in the first semester that they will be abused for no reason by doctors, patients, family members, co-workers, ancillary staff, and management, and classes should be aimed at assisting the nurses to deal with the awful realities of this: drug abuse, alcoholism, suicide, depression, and anxiety. There was not a single class on how to deal with difficult patients, family members, co-workers, or management, or how to actually survive in this profession, which is where nursing education really needs to focus. The psychiatric portion of my nursing education was spent teaching us how to convince psyche patients to take their meds. I am not saying science and math are unimportant, just that more attention, or at least some attention, needs to be on interpersonal skills. If nursing education does not address the above issues nursing will always have a high turnover, especially in acute care settings--for example, med-surg/tele (i can't imagine a more horrible place to start out as a nurse). Just look at where travelers are needed the most--med-surg/tele--the absolute worst place to work in a hospital.
I wish I could give you an extended vacation in a tropical climate........
Wow, what kind of hospital/unit are you working in? I am a nurse manager of the step down ICU unit. I do not tolerate rude phycisians or family members and my unit has the highest patient and nurse satisfaction of the (Magnet) hospital,(for the last 2 years in the 90th percentile!). If you have a Unit Council, they should work on your environment.
I wish I were more eloquent with the written word. I've been nursing for 28 years. Bedside staff nursing, some management stuff, floated to almost every conceivable area. I love it. I know I have forgotten the bad nights, but honestly I can't relate to this thread?
When patients or family ask me if I like my job I honestly answer, "I would pay to come to work, I love nursing!"
Maybe you need to transfer to a different unit, ward, area of nursing?
That is what I also like about nursing, you can work in different areas, types of nursing, until you find the best fit for you.
Can someone answer this question... It's related to this thread, but I don't want to make a separate one for it...
I guess the best attitude to approach rude patients, families and physicians is a "serious business, no games" attitude? I know there's good communication but the family can't be respected I guess it would be a good time to put your foot down and cut all the "fluff" out per se and get down to business while maintaining professional conduct... right?
My mother advised me not to be a nurse 15 years ago. Here I am still taking the "abuse" and trying to get certified (i've found my niche in rehab nursing). It's true, everywhere u go you have to put up with the same "BS" from doctors,bosses,co-workers and other ancillary staff. I've learned to react differentlly to the stresses that this job brings. Ex. In my peon days, when a patient wanted to go AMA. i took it personally and cried.Now, i just have clients sign the form and tell them " u leave,insurance may not PAY your bill. It's no skin off my nose. Either way I get paid. I'll go to the next patient who needs my attention. I hate to think that way but it works for me. You will develope the art of difussing some situtations at your work place.I've told many a people to go to hell, and they look forward to the trip. Another tip, nursing has many fields of expertise ( I've tried school nursing, dialysis, been on the float pool etc.) I've finally found my home in rehab. I find the putting back humpty dumpty back together again rewarding. I go home at the end of the day accomplished. Educate your self, i feel empowered i know I've got skills. Lead by example, i don't hesitate to tell my PCA's if i'm runnin around like a nut case, u better be there runnin right behind me!!!!!
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
I'm glad somebody mentioned this. OP, you need to read and re-read the above advice and take it to heart.
There is NOTHING wrong with sending family out of the room when you have a task to perform for your patient. And I don't mean a sheepish "can you please leave the room while I start your mom's IV?" I mean a firm, assertive "I'm going to start your mom's IV now, so I will ask you to leave the room and will let you know when I'm done." Don't wait for a reply, shut the curtain and go about your task. Yes, the odd family is going to poke their head around and immediately ignore your request, but the majority of time this no-nonsense approach is enough to encourage them to comply. If the family insists on observing and heckling and says "you have one stick then somebody else is going to do it" then you say "If you keep interrupting me, it's going to take me a lot longer and end up causing your mom much more grief." then go about your job. Then tune them out if it continues. Families are often nightmarish to deal with but remember you are there for the patient.
I've seen far too many new nurses believe they are somehow required to be subservient to patients, families, doctors, other interdisciplinary team members. You are nobody's b!tch. You are a self-regulated, fully accountable health professional. Grow some balls, stand up for yourself, yes you need a thick skin to survive in nursing but it isn't about the crap that others throw at you, it's about how you deal with it. It really is all about the approach. Watch how the seasoned nurses do it. Do they let this stuff get to them day in and day out? No, because if we did, we'd all be committed to the psych ward by now. Don't expect to be the best nurse you can be, just be the best nurse the system allows you to be.
You sound a little harsh.........I get it but there are nicer,more effective ways to communicate. When my Dad was sick right before he died and anyone spoke to me like that......you better believe I'll be going to whomever I have to to rectify the issue!
I always ask the family (as long as they aren't tackling me to the ground) to stay if they want to but they must remain in a chair because I will not pick them up off the floor :). They are not allowed to touch me or the patient unless I ask them too. (i give all the rules up front) ro they can go get a cup of coffee and take a walk. I find because I offer for them to stay they feel I have nothing to hide (which I don't) and they go get that coffee or fresh air. In pedi the parents are told it's ok if they can't stay because we want them there but understand if they cannot.
You are right You are a self-regulated, fully accountable health professional and need to act like one. No one is anyone's ***** but if you act like one you maybe treated like one. I believe in acting as a mature experienced professional of 31 years in nursing and expect to be treated like one. I do not tolerate demeaning MD's or other departments and expect everyone around me to conduct themselves in a professional manner....you reap what you sow......and if you are getting angry....excuse yourself and go scream in the bathroom vent to a coworker....... Don't take it out on the patient or the family. Why stoop to their level?
You're right..... don't let this stuff bother me day in day out.
I usually just consider the source.......which is usually not worth the time nor the effort or energy to get upset.
I feel for ya and would just say, "Welcome to nursing buddy!", but you've been in it for 5+ years now. I just graduated an LVN/LPN program (going on to RN now---all pre reqs done), and have been a CNA for over 10 years and an NA on and off since 1986. Anyway.....am reading "Chicken Soup for the Nurses Soul", and it really has re-kindled the fire, if you know what I mean. It might be at your local library (where I got my copy) or just get it on Amazon. Might really help. Hang in there buddy, K? Take care, Dean.
That really burnt me up. Fortunately I got her IV on the first stick, but I have to take crap like that from people or I would probably be written up by my manager. I never thought nursing would be like this. When I visited people in the hospital before I was a nurse I had respect for the medical staff and would never dream of talking to them the way I am talked to. 
oramar
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I have tried to caution people looking into nursing that it is not all it is cracked up to be. Usually I get flamed. It is not for some people, matter of fact it is not for most people. I refused to endorse nursing to my daughter. She got her degrees in IT and IT management. She has a wonderful job where she is appreciated and paid well. I am so glad she is not a nurse. Her and her husband have full time daylight Monday thru Friday jobs with none of the problems that are caused by crazy hours and crazy shifts and working weekends and holidays. On summer weekends they take their camper camping, they have holidays off together. She has no idea what it is like not to be there when the kids open packages on Christmas morning. Why would anyone want to be a nurse?