Really disappointed with the reality of nursing.

[NurseFrustrated]

Anyone else feel the same?

When I was in nursing school, I was so excited to get finished and get a job. I thought I would enjoy doing nursing tasks all day...meds, IVs, injections, dressing changes, catheters, charting. I was so proud to tell people I was becoming a nurse. I would be making all of this good money. My job would be exciting all day long. I would be helping people. I would get respect...

But 5 years later, ha! What a joke! Don't get me wrong. I am grateful to have a degree. I am grateful to have a job in this bad economy, but nursing sure turned out to be a disappointment. I never thought that I would be worked to death the way nurses are. I never thought I would be talked to like a dog the way I am by patients, their families, people from other departments, and some doctors. I never thought bosses would be so quick to stab you in the back and try to get you in trouble. I thought I would be a valued employee and appreciated for what I did because I am a nurse who truly has a heart, cares about my patients, likes to get along well with others, and work as a team.

Instead, as a nurse you are treated like a peon. You have a team of 6-8 patients and are running like a mad woman to take care of all of them properly while your boss sits on her butt looking for any one tiny thing you might miss (while not offering to lift a finger to help you). Families sit in the room watching you like a hawk assuming you are going to hurt their family member. Griping because you have to turn people with skin issues or check for incontinence. Griping because you have to change an IV. The other day I had a family member sitting there watching me like a hawk as I had to change the patient's IV. Mind you the patient was an obese lady with huge arms and had had to have deep lines in the past. She said to me very rudely, "You get ONE stick, then somebody else is gonna do it." Then proceeded to stand and watch me with her arms folded across her chest. Excuse me, since when does the family dictate my job? That really burnt me up. Fortunately I got her IV on the first stick, but I have to take crap like that from people or I would probably be written up by my manager. I never thought nursing would be like this. When I visited people in the hospital before I was a nurse I had respect for the medical staff and would never dream of talking to them the way I am talked to.

You are blamed for everything. Doctor comes in late today? Nurse is yelled at about it by family. Doctor changes a medicine and doesn't tell the family about it? Nurse is grilled about it. Lab wakes you up early for blood draw? Nurse is yelled at about it. Doc orders stat MRI at 5 pm on a Friday? Nurse is yelled at about it by Radiology. Assistant doesn't check patient for incontinence while nurse is trying to start an IV in another room? Nurse is yelled at about it by family. Medicine is late from pharmacy? Nurse is yelled at about it. Dietary doesn't send up a food tray for a patient? Nurse is yelled at about it. We can do nothing right. It has really been disheartening. We go into nursing to help people and instead are treated like crap. I can honestly say that nursing is the job I have felt I have been the least respected in of all the jobs I have ever had. It has just been very disappointing. Maybe I am just venting because I have had a bad week, but just wondering if anyone else has felt this way? I WANT to like nursing because I spent all of this time getting this degree and getting licensed but wow.

[lashawn04]

OP: Im so sorry to laugh. Its just that you took the words out of my mouth. Your issues are one of the reasons why I made the decision that if I ever, & I mean ever go back as a staff nurse in a hospital it would be for night shift. It can still get crazy but at less intervals. Take care of yourself first. You only have one body. Find a way to unwind & reflect why you became a nurse to begin with. Best wishes. I'll be rooting for you.

[pedicurn, LPN, RN]

Welcome to the wonderful world of nursing (I am not being sarcastic). It is a world of highs with significant periods of lows.....family interferes (have you run into the family that says "don't give mom any pain medicine because she falls asleep and we can't talk to her"); patient lies to family and to nurse so nurse looks like the fool. Somewhere in the middle of the chaos, a bright shining moment of personal achievement slowly shows itself.

Somewhere and somehow, the nurse finds meaning to her work. And then the physician comes in and it's off to the races again.

I especially loved the statement "keep my mom alive until I arrive". Compound the beating you are taking on a daily basis from HR who I believe should have no say whatever in the intensive care unit and the beating you are giving yourself (I should have, maybe I could have.....).

Early in my career my head nurse gave me good advice: make your nursing satisfying to you; do not count on other's opinions of your nursing - keep the good part and let go of the bad.

Wish you luck; sorry I can't make it any more rewarding.

Largely agree ...but why don't we go a few steps further?

Why are so many of us satisfied with a few 'bright shining moments'?

Why should I go a week to get my 'shining moment' fix when suffering abuse meanwhile? I am not a servant and I don't remember signing up to be a nun. We have become Pavlovs dogs on our little treadmill grateful for any little crumbs.

I believe we need to let go of our martyrdom position and demand more before the profession turns full circle back to servant status.

There has been so much progress eg evidence based practice etc ....however I don't feel like a professional anymore.

Back in the 1980's I really thought nursing was a profession ....now firmly believe it is not ...at best it is a highly skilled occupation and the response we receive from families is indicative of that.

[Addeycakes]

Wow.reconsidering nursing. And a huge hug to all of you who do it every day.

[wooh, BSN, RN]

Don't expect to be the best nurse you can be, just be the best nurse the system allows you to be.

Our staffing has been ridiculous lately. I generally do a few days in a row. First day, I can come in, know staffing will suck, tell myself to just get through the day, do what I can do with the 2 hands, 2 feet and 1 brain. I'll go home feeling ok. About halfway through a second day of that, and it really starts to get to me that I can't be the best nurse I can be because the system is failing me. And it frustrates the hedoublehockeysticks out of me. Give me 3 days of it, and I just may have a total breakdown in the med room.

I can handle the ***** families and ***** doctors and ***** management. But each and every time that I go to work, and I feel like I'm failing my patients through no fault of my own, simply because I don't have the staff and equipment I need to do my job well, that is really difficult for me to handle. I'm trying really hard to be more zen and adopt Ottawa's attitude, because I know it will do wonders for my blood pressure, but it really frustrates me that I have to accept going to work and doing a crappy job when I'm capable of so much better.

[SoundofMusic]

I am, too. It's truly at times a position of no respect. And then at times, it's a position of admiration and respect. It just goes both ways. At times, unfortunately, it depends on how well you do your job.

When family members are griping, I now tend not to feel as if they're griping at ME, but just at their situation. I try to think of myself as the "coordinator" of their stay -- the very important coordinator that will double check their meds, etc. But still, I AM the one who is going to have to coordinate everything, from their meals, to their baths, to their discharge ... whatever. It truly is a huge job and I feel it's way larger at times than what docs do ...although docs do drive the thing from another perspective.

Delegation is huge if you are going to survive. Involving and managing techs is one part of it I despise, because I have no power over them. They can be rude, nasty, lazy, and yet it all gets blamed on me ...THAT I can't stand ...I can control myself, but can't control them ....some of my worst days have been related to techs. Many of them are very indolent individuals and I hate being disrespected by them most of all ...here I work my butt off in school to get thsi degree and am disrespected by someone w/ half the education. . . I know it sounds mean, but it's true -- and if the situation was reversed, they'd feel the same way.

[NYnurseatheart]

Hi there NurseFrustrated,

I am not sure where to begin. I have been a nurse for over 17 years now, with 17 years of hospital experience. I have found that the majority of my bad days can be blamed on the fact of who I am working with. If I am working with a group of nurses and aides (and unit/desk clerks) who also give a darn about the patients, and have a teamwork approach to working, then no matter how much the doctors yell, or families complain, I can continue to work and let it roll off my back.

So, then, the opposite is also true. Working with others who could care less, who sit at the nurses desk and gossip, and never answer a call bell, nor bother to help you, even when you ask them, makes a bad shift so much worse. Because then you feel overworked, overwhelmed with your patients demands, and the families demands.

I think we were all starry eyed coming in to the nursing profession, and quickly lost our innocence when we actually worked in a hospital setting. I am not sure what area of the country you are in, but nurses with a few years of experience don't seem to have a hard time getting a job (at least in upstate NY). Perhaps it is time for a change for you. I have heard that labor and delivery is particularly uplifting (for those who like it) because birth is generally a happy experience and the patients are much more gracious and grateful.

Personally, I have tried many specialties in nursing, ICU, telemetry, Peds, Ortho, Med Surg, Oncology, and currently in the ER. I even did some home care and perdiem work for an MRI company (inserting IV's for patients who needed contrast). I loved working as a traveler, even though some places thought that being a traveler means you can and should dump all the time consuming, frequent flier, pain in the butt patients on.

I am loving my job, and I can tell you why: I went to another hospital (because I was tired of the management and short staffing where I was before) where I knew the manager of the ER - had worked with her as my boss before, and knew she was competent, fair, and approachable. The other half of my job satisfaction is that the majority of the people I work with are team players. Of course the patients complain (as well as their families), and give me attitude. I have heard more than once "if you can't get the IV in the first time you better go get your best nurse". I never bother to tell them that I am usually the one everyone comes to get if they can't get an IV in someone... I just smile and tell them I have been doing this for more than 15 years, and to relax.

Maybe you need a class in assertiveness, or in how to deal with difficult people. Nursing can be so rewarding when you finally find the place where you feel management is not out to get you, and where your co-workers want to help, not just collect a paycheck. So few patients take the time to say thankyou, but the ones who do make putting up with all the bs worthwhile. Sometimes you have to remember that even if the patient doesn't know it, you made a difference.

I hope you find your inner peace again.

[NurseFrustrated]

Hi there NurseFrustrated,

I am not sure where to begin. I have been a nurse for over 17 years now, with 17 years of hospital experience. I have found that the majority of my bad days can be blamed on the fact of who I am working with. If I am working with a group of nurses and aides (and unit/desk clerks) who also give a darn about the patients, and have a teamwork approach to working, then no matter how much the doctors yell, or families complain, I can continue to work and let it roll off my back.

So, then, the opposite is also true. Working with others who could care less, who sit at the nurses desk and gossip, and never answer a call bell, nor bother to help you, even when you ask them, makes a bad shift so much worse. Because then you feel overworked, overwhelmed with your patients demands, and the families demands.

I think we were all starry eyed coming in to the nursing profession, and quickly lost our innocence when we actually worked in a hospital setting. I am not sure what area of the country you are in, but nurses with a few years of experience don't seem to have a hard time getting a job (at least in upstate NY). Perhaps it is time for a change for you. I have heard that labor and delivery is particularly uplifting (for those who like it) because birth is generally a happy experience and the patients are much more gracious and grateful.

Personally, I have tried many specialties in nursing, ICU, telemetry, Peds, Ortho, Med Surg, Oncology, and currently in the ER. I even did some home care and perdiem work for an MRI company (inserting IV's for patients who needed contrast). I loved working as a traveler, even though some places thought that being a traveler means you can and should dump all the time consuming, frequent flier, pain in the butt patients on.

I am loving my job, and I can tell you why: I went to another hospital (because I was tired of the management and short staffing where I was before) where I knew the manager of the ER - had worked with her as my boss before, and knew she was competent, fair, and approachable. The other half of my job satisfaction is that the majority of the people I work with are team players. Of course the patients complain (as well as their families), and give me attitude. I have heard more than once "if you can't get the IV in the first time you better go get your best nurse". I never bother to tell them that I am usually the one everyone comes to get if they can't get an IV in someone... I just smile and tell them I have been doing this for more than 15 years, and to relax.

Maybe you need a class in assertiveness, or in how to deal with difficult people. Nursing can be so rewarding when you finally find the place where you feel management is not out to get you, and where your co-workers want to help, not just collect a paycheck. So few patients take the time to say thankyou, but the ones who do make putting up with all the bs worthwhile. Sometimes you have to remember that even if the patient doesn't know it, you made a difference.

I hope you find your inner peace again.

Thank you nynurseatheart for your understanding. You hit the nail on the head exactly. The problem I believe is where I work.

I honestly can say that I think my problem right now is the people I work with and the unit I am on and poor management, just at you mentioned. I don't hate being a nurse. It would be a great profession in the right environment. Our floor has zero teamwork and has management that looks for anything and everything to get you in trouble for(out to get you as you said). You can be completely buried and our charge nurse will sit and read the newspaper.

We get zero appreciation for busting our butts and it's disheartening. I don't think I've received a compliment since I have been there (over a year) and I have never worked so hard in my life.

At the moment I am looking for another job. I have been sending in applications and have had an interview at another hospital that seems promising. I think the right environment makes all the difference in the world. I hope that I get this new job and that we work together well as a team and has decent management. I don't mind the hard work of nursing. I just need a little bit of appreciation and team work.

I think that being so unhappy in my job and having so little support from my coworkers and management makes all the complaints from patients and families grate on my nerves that much worse than if I were in a job that I was happy in and believed in. As it is at the moment, I have lost all faith in my organization, have lost respect for them, and have no desire to be there or work for them anymore. Wish me luck everyone that I can make a change to a more positive nursing career. I know it won't be a bed of roses anywhere, but I am at least hoping it won't be a toxic environment.

[pippylockstocking]

NurseFrustrated, You don't work at my hospital do you? LOL. The things you say and how you describe it sounds scarily similar to my hospital.

[Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN]

This is a very inspirational poem from an R.N. named Melodie Chenevert.

This poem beautifully portrays what nursing means to me and maybe should be on the application to nursing school!

Being a NURSE means..........

You will NEVER be bored.

You will ALWAYS be frustrated.

You will be surrounded by CHALLENGES,

.........SO MUCH TO DO AND SO LITTLE TIME.

You will carry IMMENSE responsibility and VERY LITTLE authority.

You will step into people's lives and YOU WILL make a DIFFERENCE.

Some will BLESS you, some will CURSE you.

You will see people at their WORST and at their BEST.

You will never cease to be AMAZED at peoples capacity for LOVE, COURAGE and ENDURANCE.

You will see life BEGIN and you will see it END.

You will experience resounding TRIMUPHS and devastating FAILURES.

You will CRY a lot.

You will LAUGH a lot.

You will know what it is to be HUMAN and to be HUMANE.

Nursing is not everyones cup of tea........I do think there is a lot of reality shock when nurses graduate and enter the real world. The shock I blame on shcools for not preparing the grads on what it is really like out there. IMHO I believe nursing instructors should have bedside experience to better portray the realities of nursing. It's a great profession don't give up too easily. We all hate our jobs one time or another but there are good aspects as well as bad in any position. The best thing for me has always been the patients............I have met such amazing people.....living history.

To repeat myself........I think this should be on the school applications.......I'll just leave this here

[JennySweets]

I just read this to my husband. Just the other day we were talking about whether I should go into nursing. My mother was a nurse, and a darn good one too. But I saw the piles of poop she had to deal with from patients to staff, families, doctors. She was an extremely intelligent, caring, competent woman. In the end, she went into administration because she just couldn't emotionally take it anymore.

I would love to be a nurse for all the reasons you listed, as to why you did it. But I can't take all of that. I wonder, is it any better if you go straight for your RN?

[Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN]

I just read this to my husband. Just the other day we were talking about whether I should go into nursing. My mother was a nurse, and a darn good one too. But I saw the piles of poop she had to deal with from patients to staff, families, doctors. She was an extremely intelligent, caring, competent woman. In the end, she went into administration because she just couldn't emotionally take it anymore.

I would love to be a nurse for all the reasons you listed, as to why you did it. But I can't take all of that. I wonder, is it any better if you go straight for your RN?

I went straight to nursing school right out of high school.......31 years ago...

[NurseBanana]

When you're dealing with horrible family members, does it ever help to "kill 'em with kindness?" I just figure if you make them feel like a big jerk maybe they will shut the hell up and let you do your job.