Really disappointed with the reality of nursing.

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Anyone else feel the same?

When I was in nursing school, I was so excited to get finished and get a job. I thought I would enjoy doing nursing tasks all day...meds, IVs, injections, dressing changes, catheters, charting. I was so proud to tell people I was becoming a nurse. I would be making all of this good money. My job would be exciting all day long. I would be helping people. I would get respect...

But 5 years later, ha! What a joke! Don't get me wrong. I am grateful to have a degree. I am grateful to have a job in this bad economy, but nursing sure turned out to be a disappointment. I never thought that I would be worked to death the way nurses are. I never thought I would be talked to like a dog the way I am by patients, their families, people from other departments, and some doctors. I never thought bosses would be so quick to stab you in the back and try to get you in trouble. I thought I would be a valued employee and appreciated for what I did because I am a nurse who truly has a heart, cares about my patients, likes to get along well with others, and work as a team.

Instead, as a nurse you are treated like a peon. You have a team of 6-8 patients and are running like a mad woman to take care of all of them properly while your boss sits on her butt looking for any one tiny thing you might miss (while not offering to lift a finger to help you). Families sit in the room watching you like a hawk assuming you are going to hurt their family member. Griping because you have to turn people with skin issues or check for incontinence. Griping because you have to change an IV. The other day I had a family member sitting there watching me like a hawk as I had to change the patient's IV. Mind you the patient was an obese lady with huge arms and had had to have deep lines in the past. She said to me very rudely, "You get ONE stick, then somebody else is gonna do it." Then proceeded to stand and watch me with her arms folded across her chest. Excuse me, since when does the family dictate my job? :mad: That really burnt me up. Fortunately I got her IV on the first stick, but I have to take crap like that from people or I would probably be written up by my manager. I never thought nursing would be like this. When I visited people in the hospital before I was a nurse I had respect for the medical staff and would never dream of talking to them the way I am talked to.

You are blamed for everything. Doctor comes in late today? Nurse is yelled at about it by family. Doctor changes a medicine and doesn't tell the family about it? Nurse is grilled about it. Lab wakes you up early for blood draw? Nurse is yelled at about it. Doc orders stat MRI at 5 pm on a Friday? Nurse is yelled at about it by Radiology. Assistant doesn't check patient for incontinence while nurse is trying to start an IV in another room? Nurse is yelled at about it by family. Medicine is late from pharmacy? Nurse is yelled at about it. Dietary doesn't send up a food tray for a patient? Nurse is yelled at about it. We can do nothing right. It has really been disheartening. We go into nursing to help people and instead are treated like crap. I can honestly say that nursing is the job I have felt I have been the least respected in of all the jobs I have ever had. It has just been very disappointing. Maybe I am just venting because I have had a bad week, but just wondering if anyone else has felt this way? I WANT to like nursing because I spent all of this time getting this degree and getting licensed but wow. :crying2:

Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
Can someone answer this question... It's related to this thread, but I don't want to make a separate one for it...

I guess the best attitude to approach rude patients, families and physicians is a "serious business, no games" attitude? I know there's good communication but the family can't be respected I guess it would be a good time to put your foot down and cut all the "fluff" out per se and get down to business while maintaining professional conduct... right?

Smile and never let em see you sweat!:lol2: Kill em with kindness!

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Specializes in Case Manager.
Smile and never let em see you sweat!:lol2: Kill em with kindness!

Well of course... I'd never try to disrespect the patient, but can you be kind and extremely serious at the same time? Like conveying the message that "I'm not gonna play your games or bend my back over for you."

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Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
Well of course... I'd never try to disrespect the patient, but can you be kind and extremely serious at the same time? Like conveying the message that "I'm not gonna play your games or bend my back over for you."

I have to admit.......it came with age.........:lol2:

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I'm glad somebody mentioned this. OP, you need to read and re-read the above advice and take it to heart.

There is NOTHING wrong with sending family out of the room when you have a task to perform for your patient. And I don't mean a sheepish "can you please leave the room while I start your mom's IV?" I mean a firm, assertive "I'm going to start your mom's IV now, so I will ask you to leave the room and will let you know when I'm done." Don't wait for a reply, shut the curtain and go about your task. Yes, the odd family is going to poke their head around and immediately ignore your request, but the majority of time this no-nonsense approach is enough to encourage them to comply. If the family insists on observing and heckling and says "you have one stick then somebody else is going to do it" then you say "If you keep interrupting me, it's going to take me a lot longer and end up causing your mom much more grief." then go about your job. Then tune them out if it continues. Families are often nightmarish to deal with but remember you are there for the patient.

I've seen far too many new nurses believe they are somehow required to be subservient to patients, families, doctors, other interdisciplinary team members. You are nobody's b!tch. You are a self-regulated, fully accountable health professional. Grow some balls, stand up for yourself, yes you need a thick skin to survive in nursing but it isn't about the crap that others throw at you, it's about how you deal with it. It really is all about the approach. Watch how the seasoned nurses do it. Do they let this stuff get to them day in and day out? No, because if we did, we'd all be committed to the psych ward by now. Don't expect to be the best nurse you can be, just be the best nurse the system allows you to be.

This should be told to every single nursing student. It is SO true, it's unfortunate.

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Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
I knew i had picked the wrong profession my first day of nursing school. The instructors were barracudas who made it seem like being a nurse was rocket science. They were old, unattractive, single,childless, and extremely passive-aggressive. Most of the education focused on care-planning (how many of you even pay attention to the care plans, or even have the time?), science, math, statistics--stuff we rarely use as a nurse. Nursing instructors need to let their students know in the first semester that they will be abused for no reason by doctors, patients, family members, co-workers, ancillary staff, and management, and classes should be aimed at assisting the nurses to deal with the awful realities of this: drug abuse, alcoholism, suicide, depression, and anxiety. There was not a single class on how to deal with difficult patients, family members, co-workers, or management, or how to actually survive in this profession, which is where nursing education really needs to focus. The psychiatric portion of my nursing education was spent teaching us how to convince psyche patients to take their meds. I am not saying science and math are unimportant, just that more attention, or at least some attention, needs to be on interpersonal skills. If nursing education does not address the above issues nursing will always have a high turnover, especially in acute care settings--for example, med-surg/tele (i can't imagine a more horrible place to start out as a nurse). Just look at where travelers are needed the most--med-surg/tele--the absolute worst place to work in a hospital.

Wow. I'm single, not exactly a beauty queen, middle aged, and childless. I wonder what you'd have to say about me? :uhoh3:

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I could've very easily written your post myself.:cry: All the frustrations and headaches about hospital nursing is exactly what i go through every time i clock in for my shift at work, and the dread of what's ahead of me for the shift. But dont be discouraged. And dont think it had anything to do with you being a new nurse. Veteran nurses go through the same frustrations and abuse no matter how many years of experience one has under their belts.:banghead: I just miss the good 'ol days when:

1) visiting hours were strictly enforced and when hours were over..visitors had to go!

2) when pts and families actually feared or respected the nurse, the nurse represented the doctor's orders..and "we must follow doctor's orders"!

3)when pts/family didnt give you attitude when u did/performed interventions on the pt(like an iv start) because they werent there at bedside to breathe down your neck and bark orders at u like a doctor!

Nursing today claims to be progressive allowing us more autonomy..i really think our profession has gone backwards. We have lost control, and its all about customer service and almost "retail oriented":sniff:

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You would be fired for asking family to leave the room?

Would your union not file a wrongful dismissal grievance?

I see you are from Canada, which does a better job of protecting workers than any state in the US (save California). Very few facilities in the United States have unionized workforces, and this is not just in nursing. Most states in the US have "at-will" employment. Meaning employees can leave whenever they want to, and also most importantly, employers can let people go for any reason, or no reason at all. If the OP told family members to step out of a room during a procedure and they decided to raise a stink with her manager, at the very least she would be reprimanded and at the worst, fired.

South of the border, the motto is "The customer is always right".

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I understand your frustration. Just don't let it beat you. Nursing is a great profession. Patients, families and doctors look to us to be strong. Take care of yourself the best way you can. Join a gym or buy a dog so you get out every day and run around. Hug your cat, make love to your significant other. Take art lessons. Go to karaoke with friends. Don't feel trapped. Feel free. Bond with other nurses in your environment so you can empower each other.

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:uhoh3::uhoh3:

Anyone else feel the same? med surg nursing is so demanding that most nurses will find a way out from it, you are in a position to fail every day and soon you will find yourself looking for another type of nursing we all do.

When I was in nursing school, I was so excited to get finished and get a job. I thought I would enjoy doing nursing tasks all day...meds, IVs, injections, dressing changes, catheters, charting. I was so proud to tell people I was becoming a nurse. I would be making all of this good money. My job would be exciting all day long. I would be helping people. I would get respect...

But 5 years later, ha! What a joke! Don't get me wrong. I am grateful to have a degree. I am grateful to have a job in this bad economy, but nursing sure turned out to be a disappointment. I never thought that I would be worked to death the way nurses are. I never thought I would be talked to like a dog the way I am by patients, their families, people from other departments, and some doctors. I never thought bosses would be so quick to stab you in the back and try to get you in trouble. I thought I would be a valued employee and appreciated for what I did because I am a nurse who truly has a heart, cares about my patients, likes to get along well with others, and work as a team.

Instead, as a nurse you are treated like a peon. You have a team of 6-8 patients and are running like a mad woman to take care of all of them properly while your boss sits on her butt looking for any one tiny thing you might miss (while not offering to lift a finger to help you). Families sit in the room watching you like a hawk assuming you are going to hurt their family member. Griping because you have to turn people with skin issues or check for incontinence. Griping because you have to change an IV. The other day I had a family member sitting there watching me like a hawk as I had to change the patient's IV. Mind you the patient was an obese lady with huge arms and had had to have deep lines in the past. She said to me very rudely, "You get ONE stick, then somebody else is gonna do it." Then proceeded to stand and watch me with her arms folded across her chest. Excuse me, since when does the family dictate my job? :mad: That really burnt me up. Fortunately I got her IV on the first stick, but I have to take crap like that from people or I would probably be written up by my manager. I never thought nursing would be like this. When I visited people in the hospital before I was a nurse I had respect for the medical staff and would never dream of talking to them the way I am talked to.

You are blamed for everything. Doctor comes in late today? Nurse is yelled at about it by family. Doctor changes a medicine and doesn't tell the family about it? Nurse is grilled about it. Lab wakes you up early for blood draw? Nurse is yelled at about it. Doc orders stat MRI at 5 pm on a Friday? Nurse is yelled at about it by Radiology. Assistant doesn't check patient for incontinence while nurse is trying to start an IV in another room? Nurse is yelled at about it by family. Medicine is late from pharmacy? Nurse is yelled at about it. Dietary doesn't send up a food tray for a patient? Nurse is yelled at about it. We can do nothing right. It has really been disheartening. We go into nursing to help people and instead are treated like crap. I can honestly say that nursing is the job I have felt I have been the least respected in of all the jobs I have ever had. It has just been very disappointing. Maybe I am just venting because I have had a bad week, but just wondering if anyone else has felt this way? I WANT to like nursing because I spent all of this time getting this degree and getting licensed but wow. :crying2:

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Specializes in Emergency Nursing.

My God. I could not have said it better myself (to the OP).

On a side note, the powers at be were asking us what we'd like for nurse appreciation day. Hilariously enough, we all asked to have our own personal care partner for the day (CNA). No flowers, candy, catered meals....we want more staff! I do think we will actually get a shift with our own personal care partner. (usually 1 or two for 28 pts. 6 on our nurse appreciation day! woohooo

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Specializes in Trauma/ED, SANE/FNE, LNC.

I hear ya sistah!! Believe me, nursing has taken a big dive, even in the last 16 yrs since I became an RN. Especially if you are working in a hospital.

Now, on the bright side, there are tons of possibilities for jobs OUTSIDE of the hospital setting. Once you have had enough, I encourage you to check out some of the other areas for nurses. It might save you from burn out.. good luck

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Specializes in ICU, med/surg.

I couldn't agree more! It's really sad. I was so excited to be a nurse, and now I hate it. I cry before I go to work and I feel like my job intereferes with my everday life. Nights, weekends, and holidays are horrible shifts to work. Some people don't mind it, but I can't do this forever. I feel ya...I just don't know what to do about it...

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