Open confrontation with unit attending-advice?

[All4NursingRN]

So this incident was not really even a comfrontation, more of a bizarre occurence. I was having a one on one discussion with a colleague regarding time off. I was telling her that I wanted to request 4th of July off and that i hadn't requested time off since the beginning of the year . All of a sudden the attending jumps in on my conversation from behind me railing. "If you think you're going to get any time off on a holiday your head must be so far up your rectum" "if your are going to get that holiday off you have to work memorial day or some other holiday" " Ive worked every holiday in here and if i was your manager...on and on he goes...and I'm going to be in a really bad mood because I have to be on call every day next month" Then he goes on to say that he has to take extra call because another attendings family member is sick and how unfortunate that is conversing as if he wasn't just a huge jerk 30 seconds ago?????

I was beyond shocked and blindsided to say the very least. I have never had any conversation with this man at all and even the resident who he was on rounds with looked confused and shocked. Thankfully I didn't react in the manner he came at me with.

I know my co-workers don't like this doctor and now I have experienced why. I work nights so I've never really been around this guy.

I left work more confused, disrespected and shocked as this is someone who has no say in nursing whatsoever. Furthermore my manager will work the schedule to staff needs the best he can even if he can't approve special time off. But again why this attending thought that was any of his business I really don't know.

At first i was going to let it go due to the sheer weirdness and obsurdity of the entire incident but now the day after I feel i shouldnt let it go. That was beyond rude. I've never even had a nurse colleague speak to me like that... No one ever, especially with such language, there was staff and patient family all around. So now I'm wondering what course of action should I take?

Union Rep

HR???

[nutella, MSN, RN]

Was the attending's behavior appropriate? no

Do things like that happen ? yes

Would reporting or complain officially help? perhaps

Apparently he got in on your conversation about your time off - I am not sure why he felt the need to declare to the world that he has to do on call and such.

If you do not have bad experience with that person otherwise, perhaps think about just ignoring it.

Your complaint might have success but perhaps not ...

good luck with whatever you decide

[Boomer MS, RN]

Was the attending's behavior appropriate? no

Do things like that happen ? yes

Would reporting or complain officially help? perhaps

Apparently he got in on your conversation about your time off - I am not sure why he felt the need to declare to the world that he has to do on call and such.

If you do not have bad experience with that person otherwise, perhaps think about just ignoring it.

Your complaint might have success but perhaps not ...

good luck with whatever you decide

Good advice at this point.

[RescueNinjaKy]

It sounds to me that this attending was just trying to make small talk in a very socially awkward manner. Inappropriate? Perhaps, but I don't think it was anything to report based on what you shared, but rather a moment to walk away or say to him that he's making you uncomfortable. A jerk of a doctor once overheard me talking to my co workers about pizza and that night when I came back there was a pizza delivery to my unit. No idea why he bought us pizza but he was still jerky. Turns out some doctors just like listening to our conversations.

[roser13, ASN, RN]

I get that you felt disrespected, but this guy appears to have issues related to his own career/responsibilities. Your conversation just happened to be the spark that lit his fuse. Now this is just me, but it does seem that the attending didn't attack you personally, or your skills as a nursing co-worker. He just apparently went on a rant on a subject that tripped his trigger.

I advise doing your best to move on & ignore.

[dream'n, BSN, RN]

Sounds like the Dr. is extremely burned out right now and I wouldn't take his crazy vent session personally. I'd let it go...not worth my time and aggravation. Then again, my workplace is giving me enough irritation right now that this Dr. would be like a fly in an elephant stampede.

[Here.I.Stand, BSN, RN]

Hmm I think in the moment I might have said something about it not really being his concern...but after the fact? It was bizarre but not abusive or likely to impact pt care, so I'd probably let it go. Just have a quick, non-inflammatory comeback ready for next time.

[Here.I.Stand, BSN, RN]

And I think dream'n hit the nail on the head about him being burnt out

[dishes, BSN, RN]

Sounds like the attending ranted because they were exhausted from being overworked. I think occasional rants from MDs, nurses or other healthcare workers are understanadable. Employer's can and should take steps to decrease occupational hazards like burn out and compassion fatigue.

[OldDude]

A good response...Here's a quarter, call someone who cares.

[Farawyn]

Was this the first person who was ever rude or boorish to you at work? I wanna live in your world.

Master the Withering Stare. Shake it off. Avoid. You have bigger fish to fry.

[KatieMI, BSN, MSN, RN]

I have another big secret for you guys...

- many, many doctors are deadly envious about one thing nursing. Namely, the fact that we really can go home at X time.

For many doctors, it is unthinkable to just simply go and ask about holiday off. It depends on hospital/system, but almost 100% they have to find someone to cover their patients. Counting that you need to trust this covering person literally as yourself, and that there are much less doctors than nurses in any given facility, finding coverage is a problem haunting at least 8 attendings out of 10. Add to this the enormous patient loads many of them need to keep to support their similarly enormous loans, insurance premiums, expensive lifestyle, etc.

What surprises me is how rarely the episodes like the OP described actually happen.

If I have time, I would probably bring that poor man a cup of coffee. I do not say that what he said was appropriate and nice, but I bet he was tired as a dog at that moment.