Jump to content

Nurses on Match.Com

Posted

Specializes in Rehab/Nurse Manager. Has 6 years experience.

As many of you already know, my ex has readily replaced me with another woman and had a baby with her.  Unfortunately, I waited too long to reach out to him after we broke up, so he is no longer an option.  It's frustrating hearing him talk with their new baby as he is clearly a good father.  Regardless, these are the unfortunate circumstances.

Therefore, I was looking at possibly joining Match.com or some other website as an option to see if someone else might be of interest.  

What I am wondering is if there are any professional issues with joining any of these websites? For example, would employers view me as less than desirable for having a profile? Could this hinder my chances of landing another job? 

Anyone have experience with these websites or have been impacted professionally, as a nurse, due to using one? 

HiddencatBSN, BSN

Specializes in Peds ED. Has 10 years experience.

Yes, dating as a nurse is definitely unprofessional. Plus it signals to the employer that you’ll be quitting soon because we all know it’s inappropriate for married women to remain in the workforce.

Delia37, MSN

Specializes in Critical Care. Has 15 years experience.

You might be surprised to find out how many of your single co-workers/people you know are active members of dating sites; it is very convenient and common place, now in days.I don't think your employer would care about your dating life (as long as you are not dating someone with a criminal record) and even then, honestly, it is none of their business.

klone, MSN, RN

Specializes in Women's Health/OB Leadership. Has 15 years experience.

My ex-husband (also a nurse) is on Tinder, and practically every woman he matches with is also in healthcare.

I met my fiancee on Tinder. She's not a nurse, though.

Davey Do

Specializes in around 25 years psych, 10 years medical. Has 42 years experience.

Back in May of '06, I had been estranged from my second wife for about a year, the marriage had been going downhill for years anyway, I am asocial and worked a straight MN shift.

I was depressed and I thought, "This is it. I give up." 

I drew a little picture in my journal of me naked, lying prostrate, something like "What's going to happen is going to happen".  This "giving up" action was my way of allowing The Forces That Be to have their way. 

I knew there was probably no way I would ever be in an involved relationship again.

Then, two weeks later, I met Belinda and my life did a 180. We've been together for nearly 15 years now and I am the happiest I've ever been.

I have said many times, "I didn't have to go out looking, because the  best things in my life found me".

SmilingBluEyes

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis. Has 24 years experience.

Nothing at all wrong with going online to find relationships, career-wise. But I think with everything I have read posted by you,  this is a horrible idea until you get your ex, his current s/o and baby off your radar, get some self-esteem and  realistic perspective. You are in no way ready for any serious relationship from what you say on this site.

20 minutes ago, Davey Do said:

Back in May of '06, I had been estranged from my second wife for about a year, the marriage had been going downhill for years anyway, I am asocial and worked a straight MN shift.

I was depressed and I thought, "This is it. I give up." 

I drew a little picture in my journal of me naked, lying prostrate, something like "What's going to happen is going to happen".  This "giving up" action was my way of allowing The Forces That Be to have their way. 

I knew there was probably no way I would ever be in an involved relationship again.

Then, two weeks later, I met Belinda and my life did a 180. We've been together for nearly 15 years now and I am the happiest I've ever been.

I have said many times, "I didn't have to go out looking, because the  best things in my life found me".

YES YES YES. I was not looking when my husband (of 33 years' now) found ME.

sideshowstarlet, BSN, RN

Specializes in Med-Surg, Developmental Disorders. Has 8 years experience.

I would not recommend Match.com. I would recommend Bumble- the essential features are free (which is not the case for a lot of dating sites. Match, if I remember correctly, is the one that has a person message you and makes you upgrade to a paid account to message them back). Additionally, on Bumble, the women message first, which cuts down on a lot of creeps that are unfortunately a part of many dating sites (OKCupid and PlentyOfFish, looking at you).

Personally, I believe that nobody can be happy in a relationship until they are happy by themselves.

CalicoKitty, BSN, RN

Specializes in Med-Surg, Geriatrics, Wound Care. Has 9 years experience.

I don't think looking for a relationship is where to go. Look for some fun. Expect nothing, and if you get lucky, enjoy. Try a movie or dinner or just his place or yours. Go out and see what your best fit is. And if you find someone that you actually 'like' run with it. Otherwise, just get some practice for the your next catch. 😄

Davey Do

Specializes in around 25 years psych, 10 years medical. Has 42 years experience.

18 hours ago, CalicoKitty said:

I don't think looking for a relationship is where to go.

Belinda and I had a "date" at IHOP about two weeks after we met. I found her to be very interesting, and after talking with her for a couple of hours, I said to her, "I want to at least be your friend".

Things just went from there.

About the same time, I met a Nurse, Susie,  at the gym. She seemed pleasant enough, and we set up a "date" to go bicycling down the River Road. I bicycled the six miles to her house to her house, we put our bikes in the back of her truck, and drove down to the River Road.

We bicycled about eleven miles to a harbor restaurant and had lunch. When we got back to where she had parked her truck, I said, "I think I'll just bicycle back home from here".  Susie said, with a somewhat surprising tone in her voice, "It's another twelve miles back to your house! I don't mind giving you a lift". I declined, saying that I felt like biking some more.

I guess Susie got the message that I wanted the relationship to go no further, and avoided me at the gym thereafter. Ironically, sometime much later, she got a med surg position at Wrongway and worked with Belinda. I had told Belinda of mine and Susie's date shortly after it happened, and Susie never brought it up to Belinda.

To his day, I'll still see Susie at in public, and she ignores me. Nothing was ever said in our conversation on that date that could have been taken as negative. I just knew from some things she said that I didn't want the relationship to evolve.

"Good thing", Belinda once said. "Susie's crazy."

Davey Do

Specializes in around 25 years psych, 10 years medical. Has 42 years experience.

match.png.094e10f29a93a8ebc1d51566943cf817.png

Oh SilverBells.  I think match.com would be absolutely perfect for you.  You could meet the right partner that would support your Pepsi and peanut butter cup habit, and could also contribute to that luxury home you need. 
 

Seeing as how you really need two incomes to achieve your goals.  

Tweety, BSN, RN

Specializes in Med-Surg, Trauma, Ortho, Neuro, Cardiac. Has 28 years experience.

It's 2020 and online dating is a fact of life.  It's not like you're going to put it on your resume, so don't worry about it.

I met my best friend on Match.com but no relationship.  

I would just make you over your ex and don't bring that baggage with you on dates.  If you need more time take it.

I envy people that "as soon as I quit looking he/she appeared".  That hasn't worked for me and I quit looking years ago.  LOL

SilverBells, BSN

Specializes in Rehab/Nurse Manager. Has 6 years experience.

On 4/5/2021 at 3:09 AM, HiddencatBSN said:

Yes, dating as a nurse is definitely unprofessional. Plus it signals to the employer that you’ll be quitting soon because we all know it’s inappropriate for married women to remain in the workforce.

Wasn’t talking about dating in general. Was more so thinking of the professional implications that could result from using an online dating site

23 hours ago, CalicoKitty said:

I don't think looking for a relationship is where to go. Look for some fun. Expect nothing, and if you get lucky, enjoy. Try a movie or dinner or just his place or yours. Go out and see what your best fit is. And if you find someone that you actually 'like' run with it. Otherwise, just get some practice for the your next catch. 😄

Few expectations might be best.  At this point, I might just need people I enjoy being with over a serious relationship 

SilverBells, BSN

Specializes in Rehab/Nurse Manager. Has 6 years experience.

3 hours ago, LovingLife123 said:

Oh SilverBells.  I think match.com would be absolutely perfect for you.  You could meet the right partner that would support your Pepsi and peanut butter cup habit, and could also contribute to that luxury home you need. 
 

Seeing as how you really need two incomes to achieve your goals.  

LOL. Thanks for the laugh 😆 

SilverBells, BSN

Specializes in Rehab/Nurse Manager. Has 6 years experience.

1 hour ago, Tweety said:

It's 2020 and online dating is a fact of life.  It's not like you're going to put it on your resume, so don't worry about it.

I met my best friend on Match.com but no relationship.  

I would just make you over your ex and don't bring that baggage with you on dates.  If you need more time take it.

I envy people that "as soon as I quit looking he/she appeared".  That hasn't worked for me and I quit looking years ago.  LOL

I feel like the “I quit looking” mentality never really works for me either. I think it’s because I never actually quit looking? In other words, I expect something when I least expect it.  Kind of hard to explain really.  
 

But yeah,I agree with not bringing any baggage into any relationship.  No new match wants to hear about any ex relationships

vintagegal, BSN, RN

Specializes in Geriatrics. Has 2 years experience.

You can’t look to others to make you happy, it comes from within. The minute you stop looking is the minute someone fantastic will come into your life. Take this time for you! 

sleepwalker, MSN, NP

Specializes in Occupational Health. Has 17 years experience.

1 hour ago, vintagegal said:

You can’t look to others to make you happy, it comes from within. The minute you stop looking is the minute someone fantastic will come into your life. Take this time for you! 

Well not that fantastic...I'm already spoken for....just sayin'😋

Silver_Rik, ASN, RN

Specializes in Perioperative / RN Circulator. Has 1 years experience.

I don’t think any employer cares that you have a profile on a dating site.