Things you'd LOVE to be able to tell patients, and get away with it. - page 48

:spin:Just curious as to what you would say. Mine goes something like this: Hi, my name is AngelfireRN, I'll be your nurse tonight. I am not a waitress, nor am I your slave. Yelling... Read More

  1. by   a "too caring" cna
    Quote from Virgo_RN
    If your son doesn't try to pick up nurses, then I don't see how this vent applies to him.
    .........too paranoid to shower, that the water is contamidated,(smelly dirty bum) he don't try to pick up nurses or any women, but yea, he has been so sick that he would be a "dirty bum" if his parents didn't love him unconditionally to help him. But then I can see why people don't understand by not having a teenage son or daughter have this terrible disorder. I'ts been a rough road and still is at times, having two normal children and seeing him struggle with this has torn my family apart at times. It's ok, you haven't walked in my shoes apparently. Or maybe you have.
  2. by   Virgo_RN
    This is obviously a touchy subject for you, but I am certain that every single one of us could find at least one patient in this thread that we could identify with as well. I have friends and family who are alcoholics, who smoke, who have Hep C, who have died of cancer, respiratory failure, renal failure, and acute MI. The thing is, I don't expect the rest of the world to love them the way I do.

    You love your son, as you should. It's wonderful that he has your support. He is very fortunate. Many people who live with mental illness do not have any support, as mental illness has a way of alienating family and friends. It is exhausting to care for someone with such a devastating illness. A significant number of the homeless are homeless because of mental illness. And yes, the stigma of mental illness is very much alive and well in society today.

    My family has been touched by mental illness, when one of my daughter's friends was shot to death by the police in his driveway, while his younger brothers and his parents watched from inside the house. He was only 19 and was newly diagnosed with mental illness. My mother has suffered from depression and social phobia her entire life, and is addicted to benzodiazepines. One of my best friends' husband attempted suicide last year.

    The thing is, a psych nurse was venting about the hardships of her job. Nothing more. There is no way on this earth that I could do psych nursing. The few psych patients I care for exhaust the hell out of me. I have a great deal of admiration for those with more fortitude than I have, and if such a person needs to vent once in a while, I will support that need. To me, venting about a psych patient's behavior is no different than me, a cardiac nurse, venting about the patient who has a heart attack and subsequent stent placement, who insists on going outside to smoke, and whose family members bring them McDonald's to eat. These are frustrations of our jobs as nurses, and we should be safe to vent about our frustrations here, on a forum dedicated to nurses.
    Last edit by Virgo_RN on Jan 24, '09
  3. by   GadgetRN71
    Nurses are human..we need to have an outlet to vent long as we're not saying some of these things to patients. You notice I said "some"...I think many patients(not psych patients) would benefit from a cold hard dose of reality!
  4. by   wisedonkey
  5. by   AngelfireRN
    Quote from a "too caring" cna
    this is kind of sad to me. i have a son with paranoid sz and he doesn't try to pick up women, but he has to be reminded to shower and brush teeth, their cognitive thinking is very weak and need a lot of coaching. my son is genuine and caring, paranoid , yea, sorry you feel that way , if i'd not had a son with this disorder i would of never known how to care as i do for the mentally challenged, they are quite special and gifted. the stigma hurts. a too caring cna.
    this is the op...and while i understand your position and feel for you, please do not come on a vent thread and bash someone for venting. no one directed it at you. this thread has (had, rather) gone 61 pages without a single dissenter in the ranks.

    i'm sorry, but after all we have said on this site about not bashing venters on vent threads, this just fries me. maybe it's because i consider this thread my baby, it has had more activity than any other i ever started. i just think that coming on a vent thread to tell us how we don't know and how we are of a lesser caliber because we vent is the height of discourtesy.

    and i fully agree with the cold, hard dose of reality comment. i also think the slap for a temper fit should be brought back into practice, but then again, i live in the south, where we have it down to an art form.

    had one in clinic the other day that had what she called "full-body panic attacks". i could hear her tuning up while i was setting up a test for her (yet again), and her dh saying "honey, get hold of your nerves...come on, now." then the screaming started. i walked in, and she was banging her fists and kicking her feet against the chair. i'm sorry, that's not a panic attack, that's an attention-seeking temper fit. and hubby's the enabler. so, to her, i'd love to say , and very nearly did,

    "get over yourself. you're sixty-some-odd years old, grow up! quit whining to me about how if you're 'calm' you think you're dying and take the blasted meds. if you truly were having a panic attack, you would not care enough to ask me what i was giving you, what mg it was, and then try to spit it out."

    to the hubby, "now is the time for tough love, dear heart...what she needs is a good smack, not patronizing. all you're doing is feeding it."

    let the flames begin.

    btw, doc called the other clinic to tell them about the "floor show", it was that bad. usually she's so laid back and nothing gets her, so i know that this must have been something to more than just me. oh , and pt already sees a psych, and is on a-z meds, before anyone thinks i did not try to give her something to help, long-term. if what she's on ain't getting it, nothing will. it is sad in a way, but when you know that they are just putting on, it'll make you mad as a hornet, too.
  6. by   talaxandra
    "Saying 'I don't want to be a nuisance' and 'I think you're a lovely nurse' doesn't make up for you being painful and demanding, and calling out plaintively for a nurse when your bell isn't answered 0.3 seconds after you press it endears you to no-one, particularly the poor patient trying to sleep in the bed next door."
  7. by   Caffeine_IV
    -No, I don't know how much longer your mother will live but she can't go peacefully if you are hovering over her like a gnat.

    -Oh you vomitted again..surprise, surprise. That is why I specifically told you not to eat that dinner tray and I would bring your nausea medication.

    -No I don't know the results of your CT scan, you just arrived on the floor 30 seconds ago.

    -Yes your IV site will hurt if you continue to smack at it, yes I saw you doing it from the doorway.

    -You don't know why your blood sugar is >400 tonight. So it's not that Big gulp and debbie cake that your girlfriend brought you from the corner store?

    -Yes we are turning your dad every two hours and much better than you were at home since he came in with a stage 3 decub to his sacrum.

    You are right. The doctor has made you NPO b/c you need to drop a few pounds. In fact, he might suction out some adipose tissue during your lap choly in the morning.
  8. by   BubbysMa
    How can you sit in front of me crunched over in a ball and complain about diarrhea, vomiting, and stomach pains while being triaged, and then go eat a pack of chips, cookies, pepsi, and go outside to smoke?
    Why have you came into the hospital 5 times this week still telling me you are going to kill yourself? Then tell me you are going to go outside and stand in front of a bus, but then walk back in.....again?
    If I have had gastritis and can wipe my own butt, so can you.
    You are a piece of . . . . parent, and don't deserve to keep your 7 children, or have any more.
    You are a piece of ...... child, and your parent shouldn't leave you jack .... when they die.
    How can you let so and so have 15 pressure ulcers, see and smell necrotic tissue....and know what pus is, and think they are ok? WHAT ARE YOU SMOKING?
    Nurses should have a tip box
  9. by   wisedonkey
    To Nurse Managers: Why don't you try stepping out of your role for a week, take assignments, work as a RN that you used to be...then maybe you will understand why we are tired and getting intolerate of patient's and/or their families disrespectful, ungracious attitudes, as well as their sense of entitlement! I think to be a nurse manager, if you are in that position for >one year, it should be a job requirement that one must be a staff RN for one month for CEU's and courses in empathy towards their staff. Maybe then one would understand what nurses are experiencing as a nurse! I also would like to say I personally have had it up to my ears about patients being customers. The last time I looked, I wasn't in Bloomingdale's working. Yes, I know in the literal sense one may look upon patients as customers. But since this effect took place, I think the disrespect and the verbal abuse against nurses has increased. Patients and/or their families are constantly treating nurses as less than human. Where have all the nice people gone?
  10. by   wisedonkey
    I apologize ahead of time if this was not the thread I should have placed this!!! I just got carried away:{:selfbonk:
  11. by   helicoptergal
    This is such a great thread!!! My husband is a Paramedic and believes Blow dart Ativan/Versed should be allowed. And we should replace the bathroom air fresheners that are set @ a specific time with Paxil or __________ insert your med of choice. We would have such a happy helpful pt population, .
  12. by   Seishiro
    "Because I said so! That's why!"
  13. by   talaxandra
    Quote from helicoptergal
    This is such a great thread!!! My husband is a Paramedic and believes Blow dart Ativan/Versed should be allowed.
    I'm a big believer in aerosol Valium, myself.

    Patient: "I'm very sensitive to offense"
    What I said: "UH-huh. Thanks for letting me know"
    What I wanted to say: "Well, that's really more your problem than mine"

    A friend has four responses that cover every parenting eventuality, ans I think that (with a little modification) they work for nursing, too:

    - thanks for letting me know
    - we'll see
    - what do you think?
    - because I'm the mummy (because the doctor said so?)