never been screamed at like this before :(

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I have been working in Rehab unit at LTC facility since June (grad ADN in may). I really love it (other than the 1 hour drive). Until last night. I am a very attentive, on the ball nurse. I am very good at being efficient, proactive; learning what people like (leave me alone, I'll call you, or I want pain meds q 4, wake me up, etc.) I have a pt now that I cannot please!!! For the last 3 nights, I have gone to the room to start 1600 med pass and they have found something wrong. 2nd night it took me too long to get a sleeping pill: I was at room by 1615, but had to go to Pyxis to get the med b/c pharmacy hadn't come yet with narcs-explained the situation exactly and thought there was understanding "I'll be back in a few min, I have to go up front and get med". This person complained that they couldn't believe it was 1625 and hadn't gotten meds yet??????

Last night, at 1830, while I was taking 15 min to scarf down some food and text my husband, I am told that they want a diff pain med that night and sleeping pill later. Okee dokee, got it. Start med pass at the right time. I walk into room and get SCREAMED at for 10 minutes about how I didn't bring pain med @ 1830. I was too busy goofing off, fiddling with my phone. Mind you, CNA had been in room twice and nothing was said about pain. To top it off, I cannot apologize for misunderstanding, etc b/c hearing aide has been taken out and I am just waved off to get out of the room.

Of course it is the weekend and there is no admin or reg supervisor there to help me. I have emailed my DON explaining the situation, but I am so worried that I am going to get in trouble because of how weighty the satisfaction-survey-reimbursement issue is.

I am so demoralized right now. Again, I have never been yelled at like that. I know I am in bad situation (13-17 pts on avg, usually with one CNA) I was hoping to get that magic one year of experience so I could move on. I have been there six months.

Thanks for listening.

I will again make the comment, why is it that the nursing staff is the only group who is being screamed at, and these upset patients never seem to scream at the doctors, RTs, dieticians, etc.

Why is it nursing who is the only group that has to be perfect 100% of the time?

JMHO and my NY $0.02.

Lindarn, RN, BSN, CCRN

Somewhere in the PACNW

You're gonna get cranks like this sometimes. They are probably just used to always being in charge and always cowing people. Just smile, ask if they'd like their med now, and get out of the room. Then go back to your computer and document the patient's unreasonable attitude and expectations -- every time it happens. Believe me, your DON is probably well aware that some people are just miserable. I know everyone lives and dies by the survey numbers these days, but don't let this one patient rattle you or make you think you're less than a great nurse.

Specializes in LTC.
I would not have stood there for 10 minutes while a patient screams at me. By becoming a verbal punching bag for a full 10+ minutes, you're informing the patient that it is acceptable to verbally abuse you.

I probably would have listened for a minute or two at the most before apologizing for the delay, letting them know I hear them, and saying, "I'll return to the room when you are ready to lower your voice."

and other nursing staff members as well.

love this advice.

Specializes in Adult/Ped Emergency and Trauma.

I am so sorry this happened to you, I hope you have a supporting DON to tell you as the previous posters have, you can only do a good job and go home. I know it must be eating at you to be treated that way, after only helping someone(staying on the ball). When someone knocks us off that ball, it hurts, it hurts worse when we're early in nursing trying to find our way- but it's too painful when there's no support from your Management- to tell you it's not your fault, and you are doing a good job. I hope you get that satisfaction soon enough!

The next thing I want to say is just like commuter said, next time remember, if it's an oriented patient or family member that is being excessively loud, verbally abusive, or intimidating you- it is totally acceptable to excuse yourself- and depart. I say this not only for your benefit, but, when the patient is ranting and raving- nothing you can say will calm them except "ending" the encounter. You can teamwork with your colleagues to smooth the situation if you don't have a superior present.

You will meet some real prizes in Nursing: Bullies, intimidators, Manipulators, Gang-Ups, Liars, and more. You will learn to cope soon with each when you know your actions and intentions didn't deserve their unwanted and unwarranted response. They will come from patients and family of Patients.

We have to learn to not internalize our patient's rage, fear/anxiety, frustration, misery, pain, lack of control, and/or anger when you are one of the main ones there to help alleviate the main cause of most of these feelings- being "sick." Most of the time, the ones with any shread of character will apologize or a loose attempt at an apology by explaining the pressure their under, fear, or any other "reason" for their outburst(I know this doesn't help, but at least it's an apology).

I'm again soooooooo sorry, and I hope your able to forget this incident, and get back on that ball without a scar. Don't let one bad apple ruin the bunch for you.

I promise for every knuckle head day- there are usually weeks of non-event days:) I wish I had a dollar for everytime I cried on my way home, and when asked how my day was,...."Fine, how was yours?"

Alas, If your doing that too, STOP:) talk to someone about stressful days, and let that "crap" out so you can enjoy the balance of your free time- I know by reading this it's bothering you "of the clock." If I just can't let something go from work- a movie, a good book, or visiting a friend are wonderful decompressors!!! Hope you feel better soon, we've all been right there with you;)

Patients will yell at you, you cant make everyone happy! your doing your best.. some patients need to be taken with a grain of salt.. some times you just gotta nod your head and say "yes sir,yes sir uh huh, yes sir" and move on :)

Gotta set limits....

My nasty patients get seen last, get their pain meds last and get their call lights answered last....

They quickly learn the result of being a jerk....

I dont tolerate it.....

That being said, 99.9 percent of my peeps are wonderful people....very rare to get a rude one.....

Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

My first thought when I read your post, mmc was that it is a prime example of the absurdity (speaking generally) of having the nurse tell the patient that "I have the time", when you don't have the time. It's never fun to get yelled at by an irrational person - but it happens. And it's most emphatically not you. Having management foster unrealistic expectations on the part of the patients just results in yet another way nurses get dumped on.

I definetely agree with the "plan" scenario. When you go into the patient, say something along the lines of "we need to have conversation regarding your plan of care. I want you to be as proactive in this process as you can be, however, as your nurse I need to work in guidelines and orders. So, you are due for pain meds at 1600, I will be back then to assess your pain, and give them to you should you feel your pain is not well controlled. I will be in every 4 hours to assess your pain." (Document that you assessed, gave, and re assessed when you do.) "You can have something for sleep, however, what is your ideal timing for that? 8pm or 9pm?"

When the CNA's have their next staff meeting, I would bring up how teamwork is essential. Nurses get lunch breaks too, (well, sometimes--LOL) and please use something along the lines of " Nurse xyz will be in shortly to see to your needs." If the patient is out of control pain, we all need to be sure that we report off to another nurse. Let that nurse know, and she will assess. Please do not use any sort of personal and inappropriate commentary with patients regarding other CNA's or nurses. It is unprofessional, causes undue distress to the patients, and will reflect on your yearly evaluation if you are someone who is partaking in this form of inappropriate communication, as it affects patient care.

There will be pts that you will NEVER please. Document every bad behavior and never stand there for 10 minutes and listen to the verbal assault. That is NOT acceptable in any circumstance, ever.

Make sure your DON or ADON is aware of this pt and behavior, and CYA by documenting.

You sound like a competent and compassionate nurse, but no matter what you do, it will not be enough for some people. It has no reflection on you as a nurse.

Specializes in Psych ICU, addictions.

Sometimes frustrated patients need to vent, so I'll give them a chance. Usually ranting for a few seconds gets it out and calms them down. But if the tirade goes past 30 seconds and/or starts into verbal abuse, I tell them that I will return to talk to them when they have calmed down, then I leave the room, document the behavior, and let me charge nurse/supe know.

Everyone's right: there's always going to be some patient that no matter what you will never be able to please. That's OK and is no slur upon you and your performance. But that doesn't mean that you have to stand there with a smile and be a punching bag.

Specializes in Psych ICU, addictions.
Please do not use any sort of personal and inappropriate commentary with patients regarding other CNA's or nurses. It is unprofessional, causes undue distress to the patients, and will reflect on your yearly evaluation if you are someone who is partaking in this form of inappropriate communication, as it affects patient care.

I agree. Even if truly was the CNA/LVN/another RN's fault that you weren't notified about something, that is not an issue to be discussed with or in front of the patient...nor should you complain about other staff to patients. It's not professional and makes you look worse than you think, plus it implies to the patient that certain staff are "good" or "bad."

Staff issues should always be resolved outside of patient areas.

I had a pt (allergy office, pts in q week/q 2 weeks/q month for shots) who got mad at me because I mispronounced her name the first time I called her--it's got more letters than the alphabet and I only got one syllable wrong. I apologized and made a note of how to pronounce it correctly. I did as I do with all my shots, once it's ready to go, I pinch and say "ready" right before I inject. She flinched and snapped at me to warn her next time. On her next shot, I pinched and said "READY" in a louder voice and injected. She whirled around and said "I told you to warn me!" I apologized, pinched for her third shot, and said "Ready--here we go" and she jumped and told me I didn't warn her. The next time she came in, I called her back and she walked into the shot area, huffed, and demanded another nurse. I said they were with other pts and the doc in the back, she said she'd rather wait. Every time she came in and saw me, she'd immediately roll her eyes and huff and demand someone else. Our manager told her that we couldn't guarantee a different nurse every time and pt said she'd rather sit and wait or come back another day. Now, keep in mind that I was the one most people usually requested to do their shot, or they'd tell me they liked my method better because I don't hurt like the others do--especially kids. This one person, who I nicknamed the President of my fan club, refused to have anything to do with me. I even returned a call to her and she wanted to speak with another nurse. Can't win them all!

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