i need advice. i'm frustrated with how i'm behaving and my attitude

epiphany · Sep 17, 2008

You'll make a great nurse. Why, cos you're self analytical, set high standards for yourself. Now turn energy into positivity, not self pity and over analysis of inconsequential details that may seem so big to you - no one's going to blame you for being human. If they did, they'll see the real you eventually. Forgive yourself for stumbling. Get back on your feet and look forward and set goals for yourself and most importantly, take it ONE STEP AT A TIME and don't let those little glitches be bigger than you.

One way to do this is to write down your goals, even something a seemingly stupid as "switch phone to silent before class starts" and bring that note around with you. It'll all seem more manageable and less overwhelming. You can also talk to your nice instructor and tell her that you've been feeling overwhelmed and what plans to have to fix it. It'll show her that you're mature - she's probably just confused by your actions and may be wondering what the hell is going on with this student - if indeed what you're reading about her reaction is accurate.

Honestly, you've got a lot more important things to be freaking out over than these insignificant snafus. I'm not going to feel sorry for you cos you really seem like you've got big caring heart, which means you'll be OK, but you've got to stop feeling guilty and start being nice to yourself.

This is what I would tell my loved ones, so I'm not being any harsher on you. Good luck.

PiPhi2004 · Sep 17, 2008

I just want you to know I went through something very similar during my last few semesters. It turned out to be major depression. It started during my OB rotation, I found myself forgetting things, doing things wrong, and beating myself up over them. This became a snowball effect to where I lost my self worth because I just couldn't seem to do anything right. I started sleeping most of the time and acting out erratically. I quit calling friends and family and I only studied. My husband (then BF) finally had enough and called a treatment center for me. With medications and therapy I turned around rather quickly and was able to perform very well during my clinicals. I also let my instructors know about what was going on as they didn't always know what was wrong with me. I was scared at first to let them know and thought they would think less of me but they really helped me out and made me comfortable about my illness.

I dont know if you are going through the same things, but if you find yourself exhibiting those types of symptoms dont wait, get help! Secondly, if you don't feel that way and just feel that this is a temporary thing, let your instructor know whats up and be honest. Try to do everything you can to make sure you know where you're supposed to be. If you can't trust yourself to do it, make friends in your clinical group and get one of them to call you and talk often, make sure you compare notes about times as one of you will most likely write it down correctly. Get your instructor's phone number and use it if you need to. If you arent 100% sure of where you are supposed to be and when, call them. Secondly, NEVER put your phone on silent, at least put it on vibrate and always leave it on a hard surface at night (like a nightstand) in case you forget to turn it back up so you can hear that. Ask someone to call you in the morning to make sure you are awake if you need that. Your clinical buddies or instructor will be awake anyway. If you show that you are truly trying to make things better, your instructor will appreciate it and it will reflect in your final grade. Most instructors dont expect perfection, just a good effort. Hope that helps and if you think you are going through something tougher then really try to get help.

RN1982 · Sep 17, 2008

i'm 20 years old and in 3 year RN school. i am frustrated. my time management is off and it seems even with a nice clinical instructor, i do little things to annoy her. first off i came to clinical with a white shir instead of my uniform, because i didnt hear her instruction that we had to be in uniform. the next time, my professor changed the clinical times, and i thought i heard differently, and so i came TWO HOURS LATE. she was worreid about me, as well as everyone else, calling my cell phone, which was on SILENT, because i keep forgetting to switch silent, back to vibration, back to ringer because it goes off during class, which it has done TWICE already and even interrupted class.
i was never this irresponsible first semester....
i am not an overachiever, but when i do not see my goals going my way, when people start to blame me for things, i feel terrible...............
i get chest pain and feel sick in my stomach. i'm taking headache meds every other day. i feel really sick, really depressed, and the work load isnt that much compared to other students because my professor is the NICE professor. please help me. i feel irresponsible, i feel like i'm letting people down, i feel like even when i do good things, one bad things makes all those good times go unnoticed. the only thing i like about failing or making a fool of myself is that it comforts other people so they dont feel like they're suffering alone. i wish i didnt analyze and get myself so worked up and just be like steel and feel nothing.... but... i'm not. i try to make myself happy by reading things i like.. and watching tv.. but then i get worked over the fact that i'm wasting time and not studying. please help. i dont want to cry, and i dont want this POOR ME attitude, because veryone goes through this.. how do.. i cope? become better?

All I can really say is pay attention and if you are unsure of something clarify it with your instructor and stop making excuses like "my instructor changed the clinical times". Actually that's not all I can say....I'm not trying to be mean...but..get it together..Do you want to be a nurse or not? If you do, stop whining about how you waste time and start utilizing your time better i.e. study. You know what you have to do.

DA314 · Sep 17, 2008

A few things that might be helpful:

You keep saying you misheard or forgot things. Maybe if you write things down in a planner and double check after class with your instructor about what to wear and when clinicals are. That way the instructors will know you do care.

Also, try to get into the habit of turning your phone on after class. Put a reminder note on your steering wheel or something. That way you'll develop a habit of it, and that won't be a problem.

Hang in there, it is early in the semester. I'm sure you'll get into the swing of things. Just sounds like you're in a funk right now.

Jules A, MSN · Sep 17, 2008

I'm wondering if you are having doubts about being a nurse?

If you are there isn't any shame in that because this can be a tough profession especially for someone very young, imo. To me, nursing is like motherhood, unless you really, really want it I would take a pass because it is just too hard to grin and bear it. Take some time to reflect on what is in your heart and if you do want to be a nurse you know how to get back on track. Wishing you the best with whatever you decide.

SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN · Sep 17, 2008

I think that you are incredibly stressed and should talk to your PCP. It sounds as if you make have some underlying depression and anxiety and a talk with the doc might be able to help clarify what you're going through.

Hang in there. And quit beating yourself up over every little thing.

Lorie P. · Sep 17, 2008

Nursing school is so stressful! Tlak to someone, get help and make a list of things you need to do.

Keep your to do list with you and add or mark out as you go along!

Hang in there!

chevyv, BSN, RN · Sep 17, 2008

Do you think you may have some depression going on? The reason I ask is that you seem to be feeling a bit down, your time line is definately off (might be stress though), and your general disinterest. You state that you feel really sick. I would advise you to see your physician as soon as you can.

This is also the time of year that seasons change and many people begin the decent into SAD (seasonal affective disorder).

I can relate to your post 100%. I've been feeling off most of this semester so far. I'm hanging on, but I don't know how. I saw my doctor and was totally honest about everything going on and how I'm feeling. I also filled out the paperwork to meet with a psychologist. I have some major stress going on right now and not just school. I passed my pn boards in August and am in my last year of ns for rn. Still, I feel unimpressed by own accomplishments. Your not alone, but please make an appointment to see your doc. If anything, they can rule out anything physically going on. I wish you the best.

aprilr · Sep 17, 2008

I am going to school for my BSN and currently working as an LPN. My best advice, like others have mentioned, is a daily planner. Write down EVERYTHING. No matter how small it may be or if you are positive that you will remember it, write it down. Most of my classes are online and it is really tough to keep my assignments, tests, plus my work schedule straight. It may be hard and overwhelming at times, but it will get better! Hang in there!!! Best wishes.

nursej22, MSN, RN · Sep 18, 2008

I just finished graduate school and found myself having similar feelings off and on during the last 2 years. I even broke out in shingles once! Here are some strategies that helped me:

1)Absolutely write everything down! And if you forget something once and while don't beat yourself up, but try to devise a creative way to remember next time! Sticky notes on the steering wheel, bathroom mirror, coffee pot, etc. Call your self and leave a text or voice message. Write on your hand, tie a string on a digit.

2) Examine your time commitments and re-prioritize prn. I cut down on work and transferred to a less stressful department. My hubby did his own laundry and if he looked a little wrinkly, well at least my assignments were done on time.

3) Don't be afraid to ask for help--from your instructors, classmates, family and friends. They all want you to succeed as much as you do!:kiss

4) Have some fun once in a while and blow off steam--laughing, getting some vigorous exercise, or a deep massage will lift your spirits and clear your mind. :jester:

I am not discounting professional help in anyway, but I have had some in the past and these were some of the tricks I took away from that.

I am guessing your a feeling overwhelmed, but it looks like you are over half way through! Hang in there, it will be worth it.:grad:

vampiregirl, BSN, RN · Sep 18, 2008

I agree with nursej22's suggestions, and have found a couple more things that have helped me. My situation is a little different, because I am a distance education student, but I work 2 jobs.

Sleep - I've found I feel better, and my brain works a lot better if I get adequate sleep.

Eating well - This can be tough in school, but there are lots of nutritional snacks that are portable. If you don't cook much, there are some reasonably priced, fairly nutritious frozen entrees. Add a salad or some frozen vegies. Personally, I do even better if I make sure I get enough protein (and chocolate too:))

Exercise - I'm quite fluffy, but I still try to take walks. Not only is it good for my body, but my brain as well.

As for the time management, everyone has their own way of learning this. There are lots of different resources - observe people that have time management skills you admire, books, internet, your school may even have some type of resources. Maybe just pick one thing at a time that you want to improve - start with something small. Once you get that figured out, move on to something else. If I try to fix lots of things at once, I tend to get overwhelmed and get stressed or give up.

Good luck!