i'm 20 years old and in 3 year RN school. i am frustrated. my time management is off and it seems even with a nice clinical instructor, i do little things to annoy her. first off i came to clinical with a white shir instead of my uniform, because i didnt hear her instruction that we had to be in uniform. the next time, my professor changed the clinical times, and i thought i heard differently, and so i came TWO HOURS LATE. she was worreid about me, as well as everyone else, calling my cell phone, which was on SILENT, because i keep forgetting to switch silent, back to vibration, back to ringer because it goes off during class, which it has done TWICE already and even interrupted class.
i was never this irresponsible first semester....
i am not an overachiever, but when i do not see my goals going my way, when people start to blame me for things, i feel terrible...............
i get chest pain and feel sick in my stomach. i'm taking headache meds every other day. i feel really sick, really depressed, and the work load isnt that much compared to other students because my professor is the NICE professor. please help me. i feel irresponsible, i feel like i'm letting people down, i feel like even when i do good things, one bad things makes all those good times go unnoticed. the only thing i like about failing or making a fool of myself is that it comforts other people so they dont feel like they're suffering alone. i wish i didnt analyze and get myself so worked up and just be like steel and feel nothing.... but... i'm not. i try to make myself happy by reading things i like.. and watching tv.. but then i get worked over the fact that i'm wasting time and not studying. please help. i dont want to cry, and i dont want this POOR ME attitude, because veryone goes through this.. how do.. i cope? become better?
I agree, get yourself a daily planner and write everything down! This is the first step in getting yourself organized. Next, forget about today and yesterday, and start fresh tomorrow.
A lot of what you are going through is natural. Nursing school can be a lot of stress, and anxiety and depression are not unusual reactions to that stress. I don't mean to be condescending, but one of the disadvantages of being young (and there are a few) is that you probably don't have a lot of experience coping with stress, anxiety, and depression, not to mention simply dealing with adult responsibility. You are making a tough transition in your life, and going to nursing school on top of it.
I'm a big fan of self analysis. I think it's an important skill to learn to critique your own behavior, motivations, strengths and weaknesses. You'll need that skill a lot as a new nurse, because not all of the feedback you'll get from others will be as helpful as it might. But I also think it would be a mistake to try to deal with this situation (or many others you'll encounter) all on your own.
You need to talk this through with people you can trust. Allnurses.com is a good place to start, but not to end. I strongly recommend a good heart-to-heart with your instructor. You are definitely not the first student to go through any of the feelings you're having, and if you have an instructor you relate well with, he or she can help. They've seen it before--they may very well have been right where you are, at some point.
I also think a visit with your physician would be well advised. I find it a little--ironic, I guess--how often my best nursing advice to someone is to see your doctor, but I have to grudgingly admit that they can be a necessary evil. But, seriously, there's a chance some of what you are experiencing could be organic in origin, and even if it's all psychological, a good family doctor can help.
There is probably also a counsellor of some sort at your school. As I said earlier, what you're going through isn't anything new, and they can probably help you with ways to manage stress and study effectively. And, really, a lot of times it helps just to talk about it. Posting on allnurses might suggest that your mind has already figured out that getting this off your chest is a good start. Continuing that course with an actual human who knows what you're going through seems like a next logical step.
Or, you could rely on the coping mechanisms I employed at your age. Beer, girls (or boys if you prefer) and parties can keep your mind off your problems for a time, and flunking out is not the end of the world.
But, I have to admit, each of those "solutions" brings a whole new set of problems, so I can't really recommend that plan.
FireStarterRN, BSN, RN
3,824 Posts
You sound adorable! I like you already. :) What a dear young lady you are, I'd love to have you as a daughter in law!