My 9 year old patient was raped and required surgery

[ssouthernyankee]

I currently have a 9 year old girl I am taking care of on unit. She was raped resulting in surgical repair to entire pelvic floor and also needed a colostomy. As I change her sheets and such I just don't know what to do. I cry everytime I walk in there. I just want to hold her. She isn't allowed visitors and she is so scared. My heart is breaking. Any advice?

[twinmommy+2, ADN, BSN, MSN]

Give her hugs, she needs them,

Document, document, document,

Is there anyone who can go to where she lived and get a favorite toy? Or perhaps get a pool of money together and buy her some new toys for Christmas? Make sure she has Christmas this year, she will always remember it.

Can some of the nurses on your unit get together and take turns visiting her? She might like to play games with someone.

[sharpeimom]

She is very vulnerable right now and no one may know quite yet just what atrocities were committed or by whom yet. Family members place great pressure on the victim to say nothing happened, or that the suspected abuser did nothing or even to tell the authorities/social services workers that the child "always" tells lies. I worked with child abuse victims and my youngest rape victim was only 18 month old and her family supported the abuser rather than the victim. It's common for the family to try to coerce

the child into recanting or for the child to be removed and relocated to another family member so the abuser can stay in the home with mom and other kids. I just reread what I'd already typed and realize how cynical I've become. Or is it realism? She needs time to heal physically as well as emotionally before she can cope with dealing with people. If she'll let you hug her, do it. If she pulls away, respect her feelings and don't push it. If she's comfortable enough physically (because she's healed enough) and emotionally together enough, you might rock her as you'd rock a toddler. The stuffed animal suggestion is excellent. She needs to learn how to trust and a stuffed critter is a good start. I wonder to this day where that little redheaded baby is today and how she has recovered. Be one of the nurturers in her life.

sharpeimom:paw::paw:

[ShelleyERgirl, LPN]

I can't even imagine what you are going through right now and the memories that are being dragged up for you. God bless you for what you do. I believe God put you as this little girl's nurse for a reason. I think the stuffed bear is a great idea, she must feel so alone right now. I am not sure about the journal. I understand the reason for it being theraputic and agree, but any chance they could use that as evidence against her? Hugs and prayers to you both.:icon_hug::icon_hug:

[Unique87]

My heart is going out to you as well as that little girl. I will be praying for you both. It seems unthinkable to what other people can do to their own family.

[shoegalRN, RN]

OMG!

This is why I can't be a Peds nurse. God bless you and all the peds nurses out there. I am LIVID reading this! I am in tears. I HATE people who hurt children. I can't offer any advice, just wanted to say God bless you.

[Zana2]

I wish you both strenght. I'm in awe of you for looking after that little girl.

[rph3664]

If you think this is anything new, it isn't.

I collect old medical books and have a gynecology textbook from 1908. 100 years ago. It has a picture, from the autopsy, of the perineal area of an 8-month-old girl who had been raped and died as a result.

:lttang: will not be forgotten.

[gardenpartyy]

When you are faced with situations such as this, give yourself a couple moments of reflection. You said you were faced with an eerily similar situation earlier on in life, perhaps you ended up with this girl as a way to get you to reflect on your own past and see what all you have overcome. Turn this horrible situation into a learning opportunity. I can't imagine what she's going through or what you went through but know that overcoming the hardest moments in our life can lead to the greatest rewards.

Much love,

Sadie

[1styearsucks]

Oh my god bless you and this child. Morally I would have to hug her and tell her it is not her fault.it is not her fault whoever did this to her does not respect other human beings. I went into nursing because I have strong morals but I have learned that at times we have to go against our morals for administrative and corporate purposes. I can not advice you as to what you should do but I would hug here.

[ghillbert, MSN, NP]

The poor little darling. I am another one crying as I read this and type. I don't think I could deal with that as a nurse. It's unfathomable to think of someone inflicting that on a child.

Be careful that your emotions are about her and not about you, but it sounds like you're doing an outstanding job.

She's in my prayers, as are you.

[K os]

I agree with those who have suggested that a team approach to her care would be best. I would consult with a SANE nurse as well as social worker/therapist/psychiatrist who are experienced and trained to work with children who have suffered similar circumstances.

I agree that for your own care that you consult with someone about your past issues. There is a time and place for therapeutic sharing of self, but I don't think that this is it. You know too little about what she actually experienced. At this point attempting a hug could frighten her and may be misinterpreted. I would use caution and not touch her outside of the care that you provide.

Document everything. Your consistency will help her slowly adjust. Give her your heartfelt smile and your gentle voice. Let her guide you. She may have little to no experience with caring adults.

[love2barn]

That poor little girl! She should be dreaming about Christmas right now. It sickens me that someone could hurt an innocent child like that. God bless you for helping her!