My 9 year old patient was raped and required surgery

cardiacRN2006, ADN, RN · Dec 23, 2008

Hopefully your assignment is decreased so that you can spend more time with her. If I were in charge I would adjust the assignments to allow this.

I'm just disgusted at the thought of this. How can people be so cruel? I love the idea of you buying her a teddy bear for her to hold. That's a very sweet idea.

ssouthernyankee · Dec 23, 2008

Sexual child abuse is horrendous enough, but the brutal rape of a 9 year old leaves me speachless. How could she ever lead a normal life after this. I hope that monster gets vigilante justice. What a heart breaking story.

It is possible to lead a semi normal life after this I just pray that she gets plenty of help on the way.

wooh, BSN, RN · Dec 23, 2008

At your places of work are there rules about gift giving to patients? I don't even want to ask before I do it because if I'm told no I will end up getting myself in trouble.

Myself? I wouldn't ask, I'd just do. I'm very careful of not blurring boundaries, but I think a soft teddy bear and a journal would be a fabulous idea.

I'd avoid sharing your story with her. I'd be afraid it might be used against her in any testimony she might have to give. The defense could argue you fed her ideas and such. (Yes, I watch too much tv.) But be there for her, let her know she can talk to you. And just listen.

Hugs to you, some cases are just so heartbreaking....

ssouthernyankee · Dec 23, 2008

Hopefully your assignment is decreased so that you can spend more time with her. If I were in charge I would adjust the assignments to allow this.
I'm just disgusted at the thought of this. How can people be so cruel? I love the idea of you buying her a teddy bear for her to hold. That's a very sweet idea.

Thanks I wish I could be allowed to decrease my pt load to be allowed to focus more on her. since no one else seems to want to be involved. I so badly want to just take her home with me. I know can't think like that but I can't help it.

ssouthernyankee · Dec 23, 2008

Ok sitter is here so off to shopping for her I a go go . I will post after I take her the gifts.

Anxious Patient · Dec 23, 2008

I don't know how you nurses do it. After reading so many of your stories, your humanity leaves me humbled. Your patients are indeed blessed. :heartbeat

txspadequeenRN, BSN, RN · Dec 23, 2008

just reading this makes me cry. i get so emotional with children that there would be no way i could focus. someone mentioned a journal and i think that is a great idea. also i would probably ask for a lighter case load so i could concentrate more on this little girl . she needs strong emotional support right now...i feel for her:crying2:

honey75 · Dec 23, 2008

I have an 8 year old daughter and I cant even begin to imagine that little girls pain. Gave my daughter an extra hard bear hug at bed time tonight .

Continue to keep that little girl safe and my thoughts are with you both. Continue to do an outstanding job. xxx

prmenrs, RN · Dec 23, 2008

When we deal w/a situation like this, imho, we need to move around our own righteous anger and sadness in order to help the patient. Focus on her--if you're falling apart, weeping, how does that help her? If there's an incident in our past that this little girl reminds us of, deal w/it, but not in front of her.

Social service, psychiatry, child life team should all be involved to help her express and cope w/her feelings. They can provide the emotional support she needs, and support the nursing staff, too. They can give you ideas of activities for her. She needs play time, learning time--time to do something fun and distracting.

Art supplies are good, hand held games, board games if someone can play w/her. The assignments should be arranged to provide her w/"primaries", a team that she sees consistently.

Best wishes.

VICEDRN, BSN, RN · Dec 23, 2008

I would suggest art supplies as well...

Listen...you know that expression? "Its better to ask for forgiveness than permission."

It works here. You might be using up your one "freebie" but what the the heck?

Best of luck to you!

Debilpn23 · Dec 23, 2008

I Have no words of wisdom.I can't stop crying as I think about that poor little girl. Bless you for taking an interest. She needs you now. I also think the journal and teddy bear are a great idea. Please give her a hug for me.

racing-mom4, BSN, RN · Dec 23, 2008

I hate to be a downer---but i would NOT give the gifts. Give non tangibles--smiles/caring words/gentle touches. baribies and teddy bears are not going to make it any better and it may be putting you in a situation that makes it so you would be able to care for her any more....

Trust me---a doll is not what this kiddo needs. She does need some good consistent care, so dont get too attached that they take you off her assisgnment. If you want to give, give to the Toys for Tots program---I am willing to bet there are some abused and children of need kids in that program.

Also please please please do not tell this child what happened to you. Do not put your burden and grief on this girl---I know you think it will help, but it wont, not at this time when it is so recent.

Talk to a counselor but not this child. Once again let me say it again-----this child needs good consistent care, by some one who can look her into the eye and speak clearly and gently with her. Please dont put your self in a situation that would stop you from being the one to do this for her.