Hi all. Im going to explain the situation which is confusing. Not likely to be outright discrimination but I didn't know how else to word the title.
First of all, I look really young I know that's something i will appreciate as I get older. Im 22. I've always been told I look Younger. Im very small stature, short and very petite, I have a young face and a young voice, but I've never been questioned in my abilities. When I was 19 I used to model for a pre-teen magazine so I get that I could pass as almost a decade younger and been teased about it but never got under my skin til now
Long story short I am not allowed to take care of one of my patients as per family request because I am "a 12 year old."
My DON spoke to the family after they complained about me being too young to know what I am doing. The pt's daughter asked her for my age, where I went to school, if I have a valid license. She asked them if my performance demonstrated anything and the daughter couldnt give her any examples of any shortcomings or issues on my part- just that I look and sound like I have not even passed high school and she was uncomfortable because her elderly confused father kept calling me, "cutie pie"
btw I never encouraged him to call me that and I always just laughed and said my name is, "-----" to be professional.
My boss assured her that I am fully competent to do my job, very sweet and caring and not nearly as young as I look. That I just have "a baby face" but she also complained about my voice! My boss decided that since the daughter is completely irrational, that we'd just take me off her fathers care and things would he ok.
I guess I understand that she was just looking out for her dad. That's not a problem and if it stopped there I would not be so concerned.
I work noc shift and don't interact with this pt much. It wasn't a big deal. When I work as floor nurse my charge takes the patient for direct care, and when I am weekend charge I don't go in his room at all. The the family told another patients family member that I am still in high school and lied about my work ethic and capabilities as a nurse and that I must have not been background checked. I have a clean record and nothing against me, professionally or legally! I've had no other complaints at all! I feel that this borderlines some type of harassment or some legal issue. but I'm not sure. I am glad to not be a part of the patients care and never argued, complained, just went with whatever the family wanted! But she is coming off like she is trying to jeopardize my rapport with other patients and families!
Imagine if this patient didn't want a black person providing his care. Would you get defensive over his preferences? Age is just another barrier to a patient's comfort (or in this case, the family).
2 options thst I can see. If this pt is going to be discharged in the next few days just suck it up. If he is going to be there longer you need to talk to your DON again and a meeting with you, the DON and patient liasion need to meet. Family members have to abide by certain behavior, this woman is slandering you, she needs to pull her neck in.
Family members have to abide by certain behavior, this woman is slandering you, she needs to pull her neck in.
Exactly!!
She can say all she wants and refuse care for her father , but what freaking business is it of her to be telling other patients that you " have no license???"
But until management tells this jerk to cut it out ( which wont happen) nothing is going to change. This broad will continue with her BS.
This is what I meant by management not standing up for anyone. The person needs to be told to stop it. But management would never tell a " customer" to do anything. Customer can do whatever they please.
Im sorry OP. Maybe time will tell , and this vicious woman will stop the slandering, or you might end up having to look to work somewhere else.
Since you are finishing your BSN anyhow, I'd get out of there anyway.
Good luck to you. I'm sorry you are being treated this way. It's not fair at all.
Too bad you couldn't sue for slander/libel or something
I also looked younger than I was. (Would that I still did!) I was 24 when I graduated nursing school, and could have easily passed for a high school student (or younger). My patients often referred to me as "that sweet little student nurse" ... but when I told them that I was a nurse, and in my mid-twenties, they believed me.
This patient's daughter takes it MUCH further. Management needs to have another talk with her, this time telling her to mind her own business, and stop interfering where she doesn't know the score. As another writer has said, she can be escorted out.
Probably not. Sounds like you are handling yourself professionally. Sounds like management could be more supportive, but is hoping the problem will just go away.
It would be awesome if they said: " XYZ is an excellent nurse, and I am sorry you can't see that because of your own prejudice. As long as it does not interfere with the care of other patients, or your father, we will try and minimize her interaction with your family. We will do this out of consideration for her, as we would like her to continue working here and providing top notch care. If you find this facility unable to meet your needs, please let us know where you would like your father transferred, and we will facilitate that for you. Please do not denigrate her, or any other staff while talking to others- if you ever have any legitimate issue with any care given by her, or any other employee, please come directly to me and I will personally guarantee the issue will be dealt with."
Yup, that would be awesome. Right up there with world peace, reversal of global warming, and nurses getting regular lunch breaks.
That would happen to me too right out of nursing school (not so much now that I'm 30 and with a little more wear-n-tear :). Patients would refuse to work with me, claiming I was still a student or in highschool.
I worked on an inpatient psych floor, and many times it would just be me and another nurse for 22 patients... so sometimes they didn't have much of a choice when it got busy. Ethical or not, if the patient was in an urgent situation (asthma attack, for one), I prefaced my encounters with "The nurse wants you to do this..." Most times it worked. Fortunately, because it was nights, I never had the family there to question my competence.
On the other hand, I have had patients refuse my care because I was white. Again, it's an inpatient psych floor in an inner city... Gotta have thick skin.
If they, the patient or family, really don't want to work with you, you probably don't want to work with them either. It would be an uphill struggle on EVERYTHING.
It is questionable that what is going on can be legally qualified as "discrimination". The family doesn't want OP, it is stupid all right, but it is their wish. The DON, therefore, removed OP from the assignment, without any other restrictions. It is not written anywhere "no (such and such) nurses near Mr. X", which was the key feature of the mentioned case in Flint. Should it happened, it would be discrimination all right.
What family is doing, on the other hand, is named "slander". If they also wrote anything anywhere (any filled paperwork, any social media posts, etc), it also becomes "libel". Both are misdemeanors in most, if not all, states.
As far as I get it, it is LTC, so it is unlikely that patient will be sent out soon. I would make appointment with the DON and clinical liason (and somebody else presenting, preferably legal counsel) and kindly let them know that, while it is family's right to want or not some particular staff member near patient, spreading false rumors about the said staff member and her rights to practice is a crime, and by doing nothing about it they perpetuate criminal actions. If nothing is done after that, think hard about finding better place with better boss.
I was in similar situations more than once because of my accent and put up with that for years, being conditioned into thinking that "things are what they are" and such other junk. But once I had it, and the guy who had audacity to call Immigration and Customs Enforcement hotline was slapped with lawsuit of the level "Mr. X against The USA", as he was stupid enough to yell not on some lowly BSN but on a clerk in Immigration office. It did not end good for the guy. After that, I had to drag my family lawyer in my work place once more, and his mere presence did the trick.
Sounds like your manager needs to tell this daughter that you do in fact have a nursing license and she is to stop telling other residents that you don't. If your facility is private property, management could have her escorted off property if her antics are really that bad. Point blank, she is trying to damage your name for whatever reason and management needs to step in and not just ignore it.
It is questionable that what is going on can be legally qualified as "discrimination". The family doesn't want OP, it is stupid all right, but it is their wish. The DON, therefore, removed OP from the assignment, without any other restrictions. It is not written anywhere "no (such and such) nurses near Mr. X", which was the key feature of the mentioned case in Flint. Should it happened, it would be discrimination all right.
What family is doing, on the other hand, is named "slander". If they also wrote anything anywhere (any filled paperwork, any social media posts, etc), it also becomes "libel". Both are misdemeanors in most, if not all, states.
As far as I get it, it is LTC, so it is unlikely that patient will be sent out soon. I would make appointment with the DON and clinical liason (and somebody else presenting, preferably legal counsel) and kindly let them know that, while it is family's right to want or not some particular staff member near patient, spreading false rumors about the said staff member and her rights to practice is a crime, and by doing nothing about it they perpetuate criminal actions.
^^ This.
And, although I am usually the last person to suggest contacting a lawyer, if your administration won't support you and you have hard evidence that this woman is actually slandering you, I would consider getting a lawyer to write her a letter advising her that she can end up in actual legal trouble if she doesn't stop.
Another option, if the father remains at the facility and the daughter continues to engage in this activity, is to contact OSHA. They have rules about how your employer is required to protect you from "hostile work environments." I wonder if this woman's activities would constitute a "hostile work environment" per OSHA, which your employer is legally required to address. I would think it would be worth making a few telephone calls to find out.
Had she stopped at firing you, I'd agree with most of the posts saying to be glad this resident is no longer your problem.
She didn't. What she is doing is called slander -- she is accusing you of breaking the law by practicing nursing w/o a valid license, accusing you of being a liar, and interfering with your livelihood by telling this to other families. You absolutely need to advise your DON of what is going on (include the needs to reassure other families that yes you are caring for them legally), that the behavior WILL be stopped YESTERDAY, or that you will be taking legal action.
Actually I would think the facility would have an interest in this woman's behavior. She is telling people that they are hiring a unlicensed non-HS-graduate and passing her off as a nurse. She is interfering with THEIR livelihood.
The patient's families are just being jerks. I'm sad to say this is not the first time you will have to deal with jerks as a nurse. Some families just have to stir the turd every day over something, it's what they do.
NewMurse1014
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Nurse sues after hospital grants dad's racial request