the thread about strange patient requests is about seven years old now, so let's start a new one. what is the most inappropriate request a patient has ever made of you?
a patient once asked me to tell his girlfriend that he never wanted to see her again.
"let me get this straight," i said. "you want me to break up with your girlfriend for you?"
"yeah, that's it. i've been getting tired of the (bad word that means female dog) anyway."
and then there was the patient who asked me to toilet his mother, who was visiting. she was in her 80s and the patient was concerned because his wife, who had brought the mother in to visit, "doesn't like to help her out with that." guess what. neither do i, and it's not as if i could leave the icu to go out to the visitor's bathroom and toilet his mother anyway. even had i wanted to.
and then there was the woman who wanted me to babysit her children in the icu room because "granny always watches my kids when i go out to party. i'll just leave them here with her, and you can help her watch 'em."
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
i spent the last two days caring for a 70-ish, demented man. helping him to the bathroom, helping him set up to eat, adjusting room temp when he's cold, ect.
i'm sure you say, "that sounds like typical nursing care". and i would agree, if he were my patient. nope, he's my patient's husband whom the family dropped off because they were to busy to stay with him while she was in the hospital.
sadly, i've seen that a few times, too! one night i had two patients, and was running myself ragged. i'd been off for a week, and was having a hard time getting back into the swing of things. i was on the "b" side of the room ("a" is by the door, "b" is by the window) with the curtain drawn, changing a dressing when i heard a blood curdling shriek from my other patient. i go rushing over there and find a fully dressed octagenerian female leaning over my patient's bed and carefully touching her face while my patient cowered further and further away from her.
"what's going on?" i asked.
"this isn't my husband," said the visitor. "who's your husband?"
"ronnie, dear."
"what's ronnie's last name?"
no answer.
when i suggested we go look for ronnie, she became verbally abusive and combative. the ensuing row brought a number of my colleagues running, one of whom claimed the old lady. "her son dropped her off so she could visit her husband, but he hasn't been back to get her."
"when was that?" i asked, thinking maybe late this afternoon, or worse, this morning.
"last tuesday. and it's getting to be a problem because she wanders around at night and scares all the patients. last night she was in the picu trying to hold a baby and security brought her back."
when asked if anyone had called the son to come get his mother, they said yes, they'd called him. "but he's too busy to come and get her. he lives 200 miles away, and he's a doctor."
it was 0300. i called the son the doctor and told him we'd expect him at 0700 or sooner to pick up his mom. after the usual abuse, cursing and carrying on culminating with "and do you know what time it is?" i told him "it's time to step up and take care of your mother. because if you don't, i'm going to call the police and have her arrested for assaulting my patient, attempting to kidnap a child out of picu last night, and numerous other things we've had complaints about."
given that the situation had been going on for three days, i expected to get reamed out by my manager. she, however, proclaimed innocence of knowledge of the whole affair, and thanked me for taking care of it.
dr. son picked up demented mom about noon. but he did pick her up and take her home!
I must have missed where she said it was men that hit on her.
All women are over-exaggerating gossipmongers.
Aren't stereotypes great?
You make a great point; I did generalize. But I have to say that in 32+ years of nursing I have yet to be propositioned, felt up or flashed by a female patient. However, i have endured more than enough of that behavior from male patients(and doctors). Men have taught me that they're not to be trusted. Sorry, men. I like you well enough, but when you show me your junk or speak to me in a sexual way you just reinforce that core belief. Lucky for me there are plenty of nursing jobs that do NOT require me to work with naked men.
I'm still a nursing student, so it seems like I can never say no, or else I will receive the wrath of my superiors. But I would love to know a nice, tactful way of saying NO, without getting me into trouble. Or at least how you all handle situations like this! Thanks.
"We have a limited supply of ______ and it is for patient use only. I can give you directions to the cafeteria"
.... but when you show me your junk or speak to me in a sexual way you just reinforce that core belief. lucky for me there are plenty of nursing jobs that do not require me to work with naked men.
if ignoring him or telling him that's inappropriate behavior doesn't work, look very matter-of-factly and without disgust or fear (as close as you can come to a nonreacton) and say something like, "about average..." or "is that the best you can do?"
if ignoring him or telling him that's inappropriate behavior doesn't work, look very matter-of-factly and without disgust or fear (as close as you can come to a nonreacton) and say something like, "about average..." or "is that the best you can do?"
kathy
sharpeimom:paw::paw:
sorry, but i don't want to see it or even know about it. and i sure as heck don't want to touch it! i know that sounds terrible and i really am a nice person. i was sexually abused for many years as a young child and i have a lot of trouble dealing with men. i like them fine, as long as everything stays on a professional level. i find it extremely hard to interact with men on an friendship basis, unless they are very careful to keep everything on the level (i am married, however. my dh did a lot of wooing and he gave me lots of time, for which i am very grateful.) i have tried to work through this in therapy, but its a very deep-seated fear and not easily overcome. it has been much easier to just avoid men altogether.
when i suggested we go look for ronnie, she became verbally abusive and combative. the ensuing row brought a number of my colleagues running, one of whom claimed the old lady. "her son dropped her off so she could visit her husband, but he hasn't been back to get her."
"when was that?" i asked, thinking maybe late this afternoon, or worse, this morning.
"last tuesday. and it's getting to be a problem because she wanders around at night and scares all the patients. last night she was in the picu trying to hold a baby and security brought her back."
how could anyone do this!!!!! does it really take all kinds to make the world go round? i would gladly experiment and get rid of certain people!
and, when I first started, I had a young male patient that asked me to change the IV from his hand to his arm, when asked if it was hurting/bothering him, oh, no, it was just in the way when he masterbated!
OMG I hope the IV tubing got caught around it and cut off the circulation :chuckle:chuckle:chuckle
"and, when I first started, I had a young male patient that asked me to change the IV from his hand to his arm, when asked if it was hurting/bothering him, oh, no, it was just in the way when he masterbated!"
Not as good, but I had a 40 year old guy who wanted us to change his IV site because it got in the way when he played his Nintendo DS
I'm still a nursing student, so it seems like I can never say no, or else I will receive the wrath of my superiors. But I would love to know a nice, tactful way of saying NO, without getting me into trouble. Or at least how you all handle situations like this! Thanks.
There are vending machines "enter location here", and our cafeteria, which offers other selections, is located "enter location" and opens at "time"......Smile and be as friendly as possible, that's the best you can do really. This is about the only good outcome of the recession, the freebies have gone to the wayside!
Lucky for me there are plenty of nursing jobs that do NOT require me to work with naked men.
i know that sounds terrible and i really am a nice person. i was sexually abused for many years as a young child and i have a lot of trouble dealing with men. i like them fine, as long as everything stays on a professional level. i find it extremely hard to interact with men on an friendship basis, unless they are very careful to keep everything on the level (i am married, however. my dh did a lot of wooing and he gave me lots of time, for which i am very grateful.) i have tried to work through this in therapy, but its a very deep-seated fear and not easily overcome.
it has been much easier to just avoid men altogether.
Ruby Vee, BSN
17 Articles; 14,051 Posts
sadly, i've seen that a few times, too! one night i had two patients, and was running myself ragged. i'd been off for a week, and was having a hard time getting back into the swing of things. i was on the "b" side of the room ("a" is by the door, "b" is by the window) with the curtain drawn, changing a dressing when i heard a blood curdling shriek from my other patient. i go rushing over there and find a fully dressed octagenerian female leaning over my patient's bed and carefully touching her face while my patient cowered further and further away from her.
"what's going on?" i asked.
"this isn't my husband," said the visitor. "who's your husband?"
"ronnie, dear."
"what's ronnie's last name?"
no answer.
when i suggested we go look for ronnie, she became verbally abusive and combative. the ensuing row brought a number of my colleagues running, one of whom claimed the old lady. "her son dropped her off so she could visit her husband, but he hasn't been back to get her."
"when was that?" i asked, thinking maybe late this afternoon, or worse, this morning.
"last tuesday. and it's getting to be a problem because she wanders around at night and scares all the patients. last night she was in the picu trying to hold a baby and security brought her back."
when asked if anyone had called the son to come get his mother, they said yes, they'd called him. "but he's too busy to come and get her. he lives 200 miles away, and he's a doctor."
it was 0300. i called the son the doctor and told him we'd expect him at 0700 or sooner to pick up his mom. after the usual abuse, cursing and carrying on culminating with "and do you know what time it is?" i told him "it's time to step up and take care of your mother. because if you don't, i'm going to call the police and have her arrested for assaulting my patient, attempting to kidnap a child out of picu last night, and numerous other things we've had complaints about."
given that the situation had been going on for three days, i expected to get reamed out by my manager. she, however, proclaimed innocence of knowledge of the whole affair, and thanked me for taking care of it.
dr. son picked up demented mom about noon. but he did pick her up and take her home!